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How to NOT Spend the Holidays After the Break Up

Updated on November 21, 2011

It's not easy dealing with the holidays after a break up. The holidays can be downright depressing if you are no longer a twosome with your ex. Most people don't want to spend the holidays alone but could find themselves in that exact situation. To make things easier on you and the loved one's around you, here are a few tips on what you need to avoid doing around the holidays.

Don’t Pine and Reminisce

This only brings on tears and a snotty nose during the holidays. Sure you'll want to cry your eyes out but spending your holidays surrounded by a cloud of used tissues isn't an ideal way to spend it. If you think you can survive being amongst the living surround yourself with those that will boost you up and put a smile on your face. It will only do you some good to forget about your previous relationship. There is no sense in sitting around remembering all the previous holidays you spent with him/her. It only leaves you feeling sorry for yourself and ready to commit suicide.

Shut Down the Lines of Communication

This means no communication whatsoever with your former. No texting, emailing, twittering, facebooking, Wii-ing or talking to them in any form or fashion. This only makes you think of them and the other memorable holidays that you spent with them. Don’t even call their family to wish them a happy holiday. I know, you didn’t break up with them so what’s the big deal. Well first of all, if you call their house, your ex could answer the phone and it would be Aaaakward! Or speaking with his parents could lead to them talking about their son/daughter with whom you are no longer with. And if they liked you well enough before the break up, chances are high they will try to coax you into giving things another try. They might even go as far as to make up things he said to try to get you to come over. Anything to make you a member of the family. Then that starts a whole ‘nother level of issues.

Stay at home

If you feel that you can not pep yourself up and be the person that everyone knows and loves because your negativity is getting in the way, then stay at home. I know this is harsh but nobody wants to be bored and brought down by your sob stories of how it used to be with your ex. Keep up that type of talk and you will soon find yourself sitting at a table of 10 alone.

Don’t Let the Alcohol Speak for You

Don’t let your sharp tongue cut those around you just because you’ve had a sip too much. Drinking while sulking about your new singledom can only end in a drunken fiasco. Getting plastered is not the solution to getting through the holidays. Yes, you’ve had your feelings hurt but there’s no sense in downing everyone that is happy and having a good time because you want to drink yourself numb. Slipping up and saying something hurtful during your drunkenness because you are really in pain doesn’t answer any problem that you have. It only leaves your loved ones wanting to do physical harm to you. So curb your drinking a bit if you think things could end in disaster. Remember, your family and friends only want you to have a good time. Taking any anger you feel out on them is not fair to them.

Step Away from the 3 Buckets of Oreo Cookies ‘n Cream

Don’t have a pork fest and stress eat your way through the holidays. Don’t let them win. You gain nothing by doing this except for an extra 10 lbs. It’s not worth destroying your body over. You are single now, get out and celebrate. Spend time with your family and friends. Better yet, find yourself a date and forget about your ex for a moment. Ask one of your friends to fix you up with somebody if you don’t have any prospects. I’m not telling you to marry them but losing yourself in someone else for a while might help give you the push you need to move on.

The holidays can be tough if you’re used to spending them with an ex. No one is saying it’s easy to get over them in the first place but during the holidays it can be extra hard. Memories you shared flood into your mind, leaving you down in the dumps and ready to do away with holidays all together. But by keeping your mind occupied and surrounding yourself with those that love you, you can survive through it and get to the next holiday just a little bit easier.


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    • NiaG profile image

      NiaG 6 years ago from Louisville, KY

      You're probably right Ercolano. If I can only reach one. Ha! Thanks for dropping in a comment. Have a crackin day!

    • Ercolano profile image

      Sam Walker 6 years ago

      And don't cut your long hair short and dye it red either, thinking it will reinvent you! Unfortunately methinks that despite this good advice here, these are exactly the kinds of things people will do anyway. Maybe a necessary evil to get back on the horse? LOL.

    • clara kish@yahoo. profile image

      Clara Kish 6 years ago from Mt. Perry. Ohio

      NiaG the doggie tale can wait , get some rest and take care of your self , there will be time for hubs later when you are not so tired . take care!clara

    • NiaG profile image

      NiaG 6 years ago from Louisville, KY

      You're great clara! No apologies needed here. 48 years, wow! That was a long time. I'm sorry you lost him. I imagine it wasn't easy. After that long, they are an extension of you. And when they're gone it's as if you've lost part of yourself.

      I don't know how I managed to put the break up hub out. I'm so exhausted. The doggie tale is coming. :-)

    • clara kish@yahoo. profile image

      Clara Kish 6 years ago from Mt. Perry. Ohio

      Hi NiaG, It sounds like a lot of good advice. I don't need it,but at one time I might have needed it but that would have been many years ago.I lost my husband last Dec'1st.after almost 48 years of marriage.At my age I am not looking for another man , I have my dog and my youngest son here with me most of the time , I just like to read about other peoples experience sometimes Most of my time is spent on the computer , sorry ,I didn't mean to go on so . still looking for the doggie story. clara