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How to Plan a Romantic Valentine's Date for Your Wife or Girlfriend

Updated on October 27, 2015

It Goes Both Ways

Just as a man can put his woman's needs before his own in order to make a memorable Valentine's Day, so can a woman put her own needs aside for her man when planning a date. Nothing says that a woman can't plan a date for her man!

Planning a Valentine's Date that your woman will love will make her fall in love with you (or fall in love with you all over again)! The trick to making this a romantic holiday for your wife is to do something you know she'll enjoy. Pay attention to the things that she likes and put yourself aside if for only this one day every year. Find an activity that your wife or girlfriend enjoys doing and set about to make it special for her. She will appreciate your eagerness to find something she likes to do, especially if you put your own feelings of discomfort aside to make this special for her.

Women love self-sacrifice, and many women sacrifice themselves continually in their relationships with the men that they love. When you put yourself aside to show her a good time you're showing her how much you appreciate everything that she does for you and you're giving her some comfort. Therefore, the most important thing when planning a Valentine's date for your wife or girlfriend is to plan a date you know she'll enjoy, even if it's not your "thing." It's better, of course, if you can find something that you can enjoy together, but even if you're taking her on a date to do something you don't personally like, be eager to do it, and show her that you're having fun, even if you aren't.

Border by Becki Rizzuti for this hub.
Border by Becki Rizzuti for this hub. | Source
  • Activity - Usually before the dinner portion of the date. This part of your date isn't necessary, but it makes a date fun. Remember to choose an activity that she enjoys! Not recommended for first or even second dates.
  • Meal - Probably dinner but possibly lunch, you should make sure to feed your date. You may choose to take her out or to feed her at home. If you feed her at home, make sure to set your Valentine's table!
  • Passivity - Generally after the meal that you're planning for your date, you should plan some kind of passivity. Movies are great for this, especially if you choose a romantic movie for Valentine's day.

Three Phases of a Great Date

When you're hoping to plan a really incredible date, you'll want to consider that a date comes in three main phases (five if you include meeting/picking up and parting/dropping off). Each of these three phases of your Valentine's Date should be planned carefully if you want it to be a special occasion for your wife or girlfriend! You'll need to look at these components individually as well as exploring the ways in which they work together. The date needs to have a sense of continuity, but you also want to make every phase of the date stand out on its own for the best possible results.

Choosing a theme for your date might be helpful when brainstorming your ideas. For example, you might choose a Country Themed Valentine's Dathe, an Outdoor Valentine's Date, something geared around music and dancing, an at-home Valentine's Date or other ideas. The sky's the limit! But choosing a theme will help you to keep everything continuous and bonded together by a common idea. Activity, food and after-dinner downtime should come together to build a symphony for the woman in your life. Make sure that all the notes work together, and you'll have an amazing Valentine's Date for your wife or girlfriend.

Don't forget to pick up flowers for your sweetie before your date starts!
Don't forget to pick up flowers for your sweetie before your date starts! | Source

Tips for Greeting Your Valentine for a Date

  • Dress nicely, even for a casual date.
  • Be on time! Make sure that you aren't late for your date (even if she is).
  • Bring her flowers. Red roses are traditional for Valentine's Day (but pink is another good option).
  • Compliment her appearance.
  • Tell her how excited you are for your date.

The Valentine's Pickup -- Don't Forget the Flowers!

The three main parts of a date listed above don't include the pickup and the drop-off, in part because if you're dating your wife, you might not be picking her up from anywhere. Regardless, the pickup is an important part of the date because it's where you make an impression on your date and set the tone for the rest of your afternoon or evening together. Even if you're starting your evening at home with your wife, you'll be greeting her, so make this a memorable moment by preparing for the evening separately and meeting her at the door in time to leave. This is a wonderful opportunity to show her some romance.

To the right you'll find some tips for making an impression when you greet your date for Valentine's Day. Your most important goal this evening is to make her feel special, and whatever else you'll be doing during this time, start your date out on the right foot by making sure that she knows how beautiful she is and how eager you are to take her out on a romantic date she'll enjoy on a personal level. In addition to the tips at the right, make sure that you're focusing on her. Keep your mind on your wife or girlfriend and not on what your plans are for the end of the evening or what you had for breakfast. Your attention should be completely on her.

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The Valentine's Activity -- Choose Something Romantic She'll Love

Women want to feel that their husbands and boyfriends love them. When you choose an activity for your date that you know your wife or girlfriend will enjoy, putting her preferences and needs before your own, you're showing her love that she'll feel. In general, women will respond to this feeling of being loved by treating you with more appreciation and respect. Even if for selfish reasons, show her as much love as you can on Valentine's Day and you'll both have a date that you enjoy. Don't look at this as manipulation: Look at it as the same psychology she uses on you when she wants something.

The activity part of your date should actually be active. Make sure to do something that involves participation, whether you choose to go ice skating or bowling, or elect skydiving or scuba diving (where the climate is right). Even a nice, long walk outdoors with your partner counts as an activity. Show her how well you know her by choosing something you know she's always wanted to do. It's a very nice touch to take your date somewhere she's never been before (but would like to go) or to do something with her she's always wanted to do (but has never done). In this way you'll create a truly memorable experience.

Nobody can give you ideas for this kind of date: It's simply too personal. You can either talk to your valentine about what she'd like to do for Valentine's Day this year or you can plan something based on things you've heard her say she'd like to do and keep it as a surprise for her for Valentine's night.

Whatever activity you choose to do for Valentine's Day, make sure that it's something that she'll enjoy and remember!
Whatever activity you choose to do for Valentine's Day, make sure that it's something that she'll enjoy and remember! | Source
Whether you choose to eat out or eat at home, make sure that your Valentine's Dinner is memorable.
Whether you choose to eat out or eat at home, make sure that your Valentine's Dinner is memorable. | Source

The Valentine's Meal -- Time to Romance Her!

Whether you choose to have your passivity or your activity first, the meal should always be sandwiched in between. If you're hoping to be active after the meal, make sure that you're leaving time to digest your food before moving on to the activity portion of your date (one of the reasons that the activity is recommended for before the meal!). Don't allow the meal to take the place of the passivity. An excellent Valentine's Date will include all three of these components, along with the pick-up and the drop-off. Skimping out on one of them will give the impression of being lazy, and this is not a day to be lazy!

When planning the meal for Valentine's Day, you have a choice between eating in or eating out. The same goes for most dates, though during other times, a date out is often more remarkable than an at-home meal for a date. The rules change on Valentine's Day because this particular date stands out among any others you'll take your wife or girlfriend on throughout the year, and planning a special meal at home may be more romantic than eating in a crowded restaurant when everybody else is doing exactly the same thing.

As with activities, choose something that she likes. For obvious reasons, you should make sure that whatever you're eating is something that you'll enjoy as well (or that you can order something from the restaurant's menu if eating out), but make her preferences the most important part of your decision. This isn't the time to experiment (unless your wife or girlfriend is partial to experimentation), so choose a restaurant that's familiar but special for her. If you eat out once or twice a week, choose somewhere you don't go to regularly, but which you know she enjoys. Make sure your budget covers her favorite place!

Alternatively you can romance her at home by cooking a meal for your girlfriend or wife. Particularly if she's usually the one who does the cooking, this is a nice touch to your Valentine's celebration, as it puts her before yourself and takes the pressure off of her to do the cooking. If she eats meat, steak or seafood make a great dinner choice for Valentine's Day.

Something She Enjoys
Dinner Out
Something She'd Like to Try
Dinner at Home
Something that Keeps You Moving
Picnic Lunch
Sports Game

Sample Passivities

  • Movies
  • Sports Games
  • Concerts
  • Listening to Music Together

After the Meal -- The Passive Part of Valentine's Day

After you've eaten your meal, you should plan on spending some time relaxing with your wife or girlfriend. This not only gives your bodies a chance to settle from the meal, but it is a tremendous opportunity for bonding time with your loved one. This is what this article refers to as a "passivity" and it makes a good opportunity for you to relax and bond with one another. Whether you're in a long-term relationship with someone or you're in a new relationship, connecting with your sweetheart is an important way to keep the romance alive.

Movies are, perhaps, the most obvious way to enjoy a passivity with your valentine this February 14th. Choosing a romantic movie for Valentine's Day may open the door for more activity later in the evening (after your movie) and it certainly gives you the opportunity to snuggle with your wife or girlfriend (either in a movie theater or in the comfort of your own home). Try to pick something that you know that she will enjoy. Whether you select a film that she's seen before or something new to her is entirely up to you and depends on her taste and sense of adventure, but you should make sure that it fits her tastes. For example, if she's not into romance movies, an action movie might be better!

Saying goodnight may be the hardest part of your date!
Saying goodnight may be the hardest part of your date! | Source

The Valentine's Date Drop-Off - Saying Goodnight

Saying goodnight to your valentine may be the hardest part of the evening. Parting can always be difficult, but knowing how to end the evening on a high note will help you to make sure that it goes off without a hitch and leaves your girlfriend wanting more. Hopefully by this time in the evening you've had a wonderful time and all that's left is to make sure that you know how much you appreciate her.

As with the beginning of your date, you want to make sure that your mind is focused entirely on her. Make her remember the evening for a long time, because when she looks back on this evening, she should feel loved and in tune with you. I you choose to focus your attention on her when you part, you'll help her to focus on you because this is a heartfelt expression of love for your partner.

Look at her when you say goodnight. Keep your eyes on her. Tell her (again) how beautiful she is, and how much she means to you. Let her know that you had an amazing time during your date (even if you didn't!) and make sure that she knows that you'll miss her while the two of you are apart (even if you're just going to bed for the night beside your wife).

Following Up on Your Valentine's Date

Make sure that you follow up on your date with your valentine this year! Call her the next day and repeat how much you enjoyed your date together. Make sure that you always cement this in your memory as a great time that the two of you had together so that you can look back on this day together in the future and smile. Particularly if your relationship is young, it's good to know that on the rainy days when you struggle with one another, you can pull these memories out of your file and enjoy remembering the fun you had on Valentine's Day!

More Valentine's Day from Becki's Gift Guides

If you've enjoyed this article and are looking for more ways to romance your wife or girlfriend, look no further! Becki has provided you with other ideas for making the Valentine's Holiday special and memorable for the two of you. Here are some more tips for guys.

Why not try writing your woman a love letter for Valentine's Day? This is a no-cost option for an excellent Valentine's gift that you know she'll appreciate for years to come.

Don't forget to get your wife or girlfriend a Valentine's gift this year! Sending her a teddy bear for Valentine's Day makes a great gift!

© 2014 Becki Rizzuti


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