Is Celibacy Possible?

If I could start with defining the term celibacy; it is a gift of choice that that makes someone restrain from engaging in sexual relations and in the issue of marriage. Typically, and more often celibacy has been related to religious reasons, in that people choose chastity for sacred religious reasons like priesthood and such like things. Making a choice of chastity for whatever reasons other than religious convictions can be a way of practicing celibacy.

Kenya’s population consist of an 85% number of youths in a population of over forty million people. Out of this 85% more than a half are between the ages brackets of (15-50) years. This age bracket consists of people who are highly active in every aspect of life. Most of these people are youths in colleges and universities who have fallen for college life as an option. The upper age group consists of people who are ideally perceived to be into relationships which is not obviously the case. This brings me to my topic of interest; is celibacy achievable?

There are a number of facts about college life and one of them is the issue of dating. Students in college are in a status of curiosity and adventure, a state of exploring to find who they are and what they are capable of doing. There is a lot of socialism and interaction among students that make them ride in a certain direction and dating is one of them. Students are worried about finding life partners who are complete and perfect according to their standards. This is where sexual relations come in, youths and most students use this as one of the measures to determine the kind of people they want in their life.

Apart from college students, there are a considerable number of people who are yet to be married but are not celibate. There are others who are from a broken relationship and are celibate, and others want to break into and out of celibacy. These are people from different aspects of culture, religion, and beliefs and these three standpoints determine their basic convictions about celibacy.

Religion is largely one of the most dominant foundations of celibacy among many people. Many people will tell you that their descriptions to abstain was influenced by their religion which of course is strongly based on spirituality. Religion sternly requires abstinence before marriage. And from this principles people have developed different attitudes and perceptions about being celibate and consequently their descriptions.

Culture plays a role in abstinence and celibacy. Hollywood culture, for instance, has been in existence for many decades and agreeably it has a massive influence on the behaviors of people around the world. A case in point is the trends that Hollywood defines itself, tends that range from fashion, language character, and other extremities. People who give much attention to Hollywood will likely have to obsessively shadow these trends. That is exactly what happens with celibacy. People follow the character and develop an attitude of celibacy by the influence of Hollywood via their idols- as they say.

The scope of celibacy can be based on personal beliefs that are largely dependent on the state of mind that people think all celibacy should be about. There are people who have beliefs that celibacy defines their success. Some other people think that celibacy is a powerful tool of empowerment as it gives a sense of control and purpose. Others think celibacy is a way to avoid transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies. Most of all these beliefs are true to some and to others they are not.

The answer is yes. There are many ways one can use to achieve and practice celibacy without considering their present lifestyle and what they do. Some ways are founded on motivation and rewards. Others have a foundation of purpose and religion. Achieving celibacy depends on the individual and their environment and largely their personal beliefs and instincts about celibacy

The mind works in a way that it receives and stores information for future reference. The kind of information we feed our mind especially the explicit ones determines how we react, feel and think about things around us. In this way, we also develop attitudes and perceptions.

The first way to achieve a perfect celibate life and culture is to manage your mind and thoughts .having a mindset of a reason why you are into celibacy will mean that you will have to filter what information you feed your mind. Acts are incepted in the mind before the brain releases a command of physical inaction that is driven by our instincts. Getting the right information will enable development of positive instincts that lead to perfect celibacy

Finding a purpose for life is another way to achieve celibacy. Purpose comes with self-realization, defining who you are and what you want and what the challenges and constraints could be. For this case, sexual relations could be a challenge that impairs your way to achieve your purpose. People can achieve their purpose by taking celibacy as a challenge and a ladder to purpose. Confronting celibacy is easy if a person defines and knows their purpose.

As I said earlier, religion is one of the most dominant foundations of celibacy. A person can achieve celibacy on Christian grounds of purity and whole fullness. Many of the religions I know live by the commandment of no sex before marriage. This is what they teach their generations and fortunately, many followers abide by this. Certainly, there are rewards of chastity that religion promises and one promise are a success. The Bible gives a story of Joseph who chooses abstinence and chastity. He did this because he was raised in a pure religion. He became the next powerful person in Egypt after Pharaoh and full filled God’s will of freeing Israelites. There is always a reward for chastity that is based on religion and pure religious believes. The rewards are there to motivate a person to be celibate.

Celibacy, chastity, and abstinence may be interchangeably used to mean the same thing. Celibacy is based on vows to be unmarried, chastity emphasizes on purity and abstinence stresses on restraining .but the end objective of the three is to avoid sexual relationships before the right time and for the right reasons.

All these three things should not be based on fear or influenced by methodologies and what the general people think about it. They should be based on personal levels and convictions. People should have a pure and clean reason for practicing celibacy and they should not be judged for whatever reason.

Celibacy does not have to be forever. Some people practice celibacy so that they can find their purpose, others do it out of a broken relationship and others do it for health reasons. However, celibacy should never be a link to the next relationship as it will mean a person will value most the act rather than the people and the relationship they are in.