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A question of morality and suspicion

Updated on May 17, 2012

You read ur partners texts & found out he/she is cheating. Do you have the moral ground to confront? asked by Lady_E 4 hours ago

The "termites" in a defective marriage vow
The "termites" in a defective marriage vow

Before anything else, let me say that this subject matter of the question is very serious for me, so you can expect a lengthy answer.

In the first place, the fact that I checked on his text messages secretly only shows that I had been suspicious of his integrity and that I should have already discussed with him my suspicions and all the reasons surrounding it, in which in turn, he should have already denied vehemently too and have had tried to prove as groundless and untrue...yet my suspicions persist hurts just to be suspicious.

The discovery of his infidelity only confirms my suspicion. I cannot tolerate pathological liars and traitors especially in a marriage vows where each of the couple is expected not only to love and but also to reciprocate and respect each others' needs ; for me cheaters are pests, they are loathsome termites that invade the foundation of my husband should be the first to know how I deal with disloyalty; he should be the first to know my decisiveness when my trust is abused; he should be the first to know that I burn bridges the minute I discover its foundation as "termite-infested".

Confrontation is irrelevant in this situation, I won't need explanations and my ordeal of spending sleepless nights and having this disturbing feelings and flow of thinking that are based on distrust had come to an end...I am fully convinced that I had been right all the way and this is all that I needed; he lied and he has no right to expect me to be true to him even if I am always naturally straightforward under normal situations...our "journey together", I mean our marriage is done... I won't even tell him that I read his text messages...let him suspect to death or ask me if I knew something, anything; I won't give him the benefit of the doubt and to let him know what I had discovered... I will just leave him or kick him out from my life in my own terms; I cannot live one minute more under one roof with a cheating husband, with a "clan of termites in his dark soul" that consume a structure's foundation as quickly as a wink... Confrontation is irrelevant in this situation; I would tell him that my suspicions are eating my soul like cancer...that I don't want to spend one minute more of my life wallowing in the stinking mud of suspicions. I would kick him out from my life in the grounds of suspicions, take it or leave it, but I cannot listen anymore...let alone stay with my heart bursting and spewing the coals of hell under this den of .morbid marriage hell with this marriage! Yes, I will curse marriage if all the men that is left in this planet are cheaters. I will find happiness and redefine it in my own terms...excluding men.


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