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Finally, the secret was revealed: men really love (but once in a lifetime)

Updated on January 18, 2013

Men are sensitive creatures!

At first, there was a rumor, saying that men are able to be over head and ears in love, exactly like women. Then, life experience taught me that this phenomenon happens only once, in their adolescence or in early youth. After this period, men seem to close their emotional sphere, moving away from women and from the feminine side of their own personality.

One way or another, men (or the beautiful part of their soul) seem to remain anchored in these early feelings from early adulthood. Only then a man loves from the bottom of his heart, he is shy and bold in the same time, charming naïve, unexpectedly romantic (24 hours a day!), careful, warm, sweet, protective, surprising, able to offer flowers all the time, chocolates, sweet kisses and hugs under the moon light. His vocabulary is rich, full of courteous phrases, he is able to play an instrument or sing, being a minstrel for the lady of his heart. More than that, he is able to make promises and dream of a future perfect life, full of pink love and a lot of candies. No wonder that he thinks he can move mountains or make the impossible possible if his lover asks for it. Thus, the most surprising gestures are done. Well…no wonder that literature or music are full of these beautiful characters. Cupid, Don Juan, Prince Charming could be any real man, but only in that very special phase of his early life. They are ideal, they are simply beautiful!

But, there is a bad news too in this story

Unfortunately, most of these loves don’t last forever. Not because the partners don’t love each other enough, but because life is more complicated than this and most of the time love (no matter how great) cannot solve all the problems. Lack of experience is a serious minus and only few of them are wise enough to understand that a relationship is more than love, it’s about compromises, maturity, desire to maintain the feelings.

It seems that after this first beautiful discovery experience, women and men evolve differently. Men are not able to repeat their first emotional experience. Most of them are judging women in the same way, no matter the fact that each human being is unique. They forget to be sweet, talkative, surprising, protective and romantic. They prefer to talk less and feel comfortable being alone or with other men. Sometimes they will never enjoy the same emotional involvement, the same dedication. It’s like they feel intuitively that they will never get the same quality of love so they stop dream about it. And after a while they forget about it for the rest of their life.

Women are different. They have sufficient emotional resources to be fully involved every time they fall in love with another man. Their love experiences are new every time, no matter how serious they have been injured before. For them, every new man is special. Every new love is forever. And they really want him to be the last, hoping that he feels the same. Women know that love cannot support itself, it’s based on two people and their desire and wisdom to be together during this life adventure.

Maybe psychologists are right. Female behavior is not emotional instability. It’s about their capacity to renew their hopes and feelings and dreams. This is why women need to remain beautiful and young. They offer themselves more time to find the One. Sometimes this doesn’t happen.

Men must be taught the power of love to heal, to restore, to make us happier. They must be encouraged to express their feelings no matter what, and involve more in the relationships.

Dear wonderful men, just give Love a chance, live and love again and again, because you can do this.

Stress in the sexes - Dr. John Grey

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