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Soul Mate, Lover, Friend and Perfect

Updated on December 30, 2014

The soul mate I didn't think possible

Do you believe in soulmates?. In love at first site? Lucky for me I didn't have to - someone else did!

On August 18th, 2012, I sat down to my Facebook page. As I always did at that time, I went through my "Friend Requests" and, as long as there was some sort of affiliation to my business (making body jewelry) I would accept them. It didn't faze me that anyone from a piercing or tattoo shop ever asked - it was par for the course as I'd been working in the industry for nearly a decade and most of my "friends" came from there.

Imagine my surprise when I then sat down to a message from one of them that wasn't asking about one of their orders.

"We met once or twice when I was collecting jewelry for Cody @ Creative. I was wondering if you wanted to get together for a beer some time."

In a quite agreeable business frame of mind regarding customers, I "Accepted" this task, responding with a perfectly perky "That could be fun! Im terribly shy around new people, I must warn."

As soon as I hit the "enter" key, I wanted to take it back. I wanted to tell him I wasn't able to follow through because guys didn't ask me out. They just didn't. What if he didn't fancy the way I looked? What if I said the wrong thing? What if he thought I was someone else?

In an absolute panic I ran to my roommate:

"A guy just asked me out and I said yes but I can't because I can't date and I don't date and I don't date, because I can't and whatamIgonnado?!"

Guys don't ask girls that look akin to me out on dates.

All Photos by Gina Blanchard, All Rights Reserved.

Shy, panicked, unknowing
Shy, panicked, unknowing

The beginning

August 19th, he asked me out officially. He tried to call, but I didn't answer. He got my number off of Facebook. I never answer if I don't recognize the number and I was too shy to start there.

Then, the text came in....

(Note: the Following is word-for-word from the texts we sent each other that yes, I kept)

"Hey, I'm going to 99 bottles at 9:30 ish tonight. Want to meet there? :-)"

For an eternity, those words hung there on my iPhone, waiting for me to respond with something, anything at all. For thirty minutes I let that happen while I drank straight from the bottle of courage and panicked out-loud to that ever-patient roommate.

I didn't know what to say or what to do or where to go. I wanted so bad to just be one of those normal human beings who could walk down to 99 Bottles (it's half a mile from my house) and meet this guy, just to see what could happen. I wasn't one of those people. I'm still not. I'm socially anxious and shy as all get out, let me tell you.

"No- too drunk tonight and have work tomorrow."

Now now, I wasn't lying so much as I'd spent the last 30 minutes making the fact true. I wasn't drinking to avoid him, either, but was trying to drink some sense into myself, which didn't happen, by the way.

"Boo. I'm off. What are you doing tomorrow after work?"

He was a persistent one if nothing else (which will come in handy later).

"Haha. Dunno 'til I'm off."

You could hear the shy in the writing. Ha-ha.... I can feel it now as a physical reminder when I think back, just as warm on my cheeks now as it was then.

"Well, if you want to meet up hit me up. :-)"

Oh, if I could have put what I was thinking...

Yes, yes! Yes, I want to know all about you! I want to know why you are curious about me!

... I'm just too shy to walk through an already opened door.

August 22

This is not to say that he and I did not have interaction in between, because we did, but that it looked a lot like the aforementioned discussion and I did not feel the need for repeating. .

"Okay, so here's the deal- I'm finally drunk enough to tell you I'm not disinterested- just shy to the point of dysfunctional. I'm not a basket case - just awkward and prone to anxiety attacks when confronted with new faces, however that sounds. Ha.Ha."

His phone only receives about three lines but I couldn't discern that at the time. He responds as if he received it all. To this day I still don't grasp fully what all he read. Obviously it was not enough to deter, for whatever reason.

"No worries. I'm at 99 now. Just breathe deep come out or pick a place and time you feel comfy with. Is there anything I could do or say to make the shyness go away? I'm cool if you want to talk to me or text if that helps."

You can't make up this kind of patience. Remember, we haven't gone out yet and clearly I'm not one of the most psychologically stable women in Santa Cruz.

"Maybe! It's embarrassing for me that I'm so awkward - so I'm mostly a hermit. Haha."

Every shy ends in "Haha" doesn't it? I expected him to pick up the "Hermit" part of this statement.

"Awkward how? Like clumsy or do you scream inappropriate things?"

How does one even respond to that question?

He texted me every day

telling me where he'd be

for almost two weeks

TWO WEEKS

before I gave in.

Between this text and August 31st, he sent a myriad of his daily activities, always telling me what time he was going to be at 99 that night and wondering if I'd swing by. There was one time when we were literally across the street from one another and all I could do was look towards that other building and wonder.

He made jokes and called me his pen-pal. He even swung by my work once; this time I was actually busy and didn't have time for visitors, though I'd wager if I weren't busy I'd still not have been able to face him. At this point, my roommate sat him down and explained I wasn't a crazy girl, or something.

He wasn't lying per-say.

Winning on a Blue Moon by Chance

Would I have just gone out with him at any point in time, if not for the universe lining up in a perfect place, a perfect time?

Some backstory: I was in a relationship for five years before this and had been out of it for a year. When we had broken up, I swore to myself I wasn't going to date anyone else for two years. Do the math = I was only in the middle of my promise. I also liked to work ALLTHETIME and couldn't imagine how I could find a way to fit another human into my schedule and still do what I needed to do with my life - or what I thought I needed to do with my life.

August 31st, 2012

Every two or three years the calendar lines up so that two full moons line up in a month; This is called a Blue Moon and is often used to indicate something that is done less often.

"You at the Rush?"

I was exactly there when the text came in; The Rush Inn (when you tell people about it, a lot of them think it's 'The Russian' for a considerable amount of time) is in the heart of Santa Cruz, near to the clock tower. It is a nice dive-bar with serious local appeal.

Normally I might have avoided this question, perhaps even left, but I told myself:

"Self, you gotta do this. It's once in a Blue Moon."

and to my surprise my self finally conceded.

I shot a glass of whiskey or two (or four) and grabbed a beer before my groundbreaking moment:

"Yes!"

Just that.

"Now we know each others hangouts. I feel like a stalker."

With that single text, I knew there was no going back - he was going to come there and I was going to have to face the proverbial music. I could not avoid him anymore! Between drinking as quickly as possible and sinking my head into a game of pool, I tried to distract my thoughts to keep me from running away.

"Don't think I'd know what you looked like if you walked in."

I did actually - he'd sent me a picture and I'd already totally virtual stalked him up and down Facebook,.

"Soooo you did only check out my body in that photo. Busted."

...........

"Maybe. Haha...ha."

It was too soon to tell him I was doing lots of that, too.

"Mohawk, 6'1", biomech left arm incomplete. Head hunter tiki gods right leg incomplete."

Every word, every description was more terrifying than the last. This stranger was becoming something, someone more solid... I was anxious, near-breathless, quickly headed towards more tha a strong buzz.... waiting...waiting... waiting...

"Hey, I think your friend is already here." It was my bestie Jeff who said it while the two of us played pool.

You see, my pen-pal had already tip-toed his way to the bar to order a drink and had been watching me play pool.

"Oh. Hey... Nice to actually meet you..."

What else was there to say? At some point as the hours began to peel by my friend believed me safe and excused himself from our scenario. I turned towards Ross and let my knee touch his while I clung to every word. I remember thinking I wish he would kiss me... just kiss me... and wondering all the while if he was even truly still interested.

At 2am when we were practically shoved outside he offered to walk me back to my place. I wasn't ready to let him go, to end the night, to start tomorrow without our already mutual laughter.

The next thing you know we were kissing on the couch like a couple of teenagers if you know what I mean. With whatever I could muster in myself I peeled myself away from him and literally pushed him out the door.

"I want to see you again!"

From my hallway while I dreamily wondered if he'd call after he left. It caught me by surprise.

YesYesYesYesYes!

"What? Umm.. Okay...Sure."

"Go hiking with me."

I hate hiking.

"Heh .. hehheh.. That sounds fun."

I didn't even have time to think about what I was agreeing to because then he smiled so big my very soul wanted to jump free and dance with his from that moment. I kissed him once more and closed the door, then put myself against it and wondered if he was still there on the other side. I clutched my hand to my heart and knew to my core that I needed that to happen again and again.

As it turns out I do like hiking.

Some Things From Along My Ways

Large Genuine Leather Photo Album with Gift Box - Scrapbook Style Pages - Holds 400 4x6" or 200 5x7" Photos
Large Genuine Leather Photo Album with Gift Box - Scrapbook Style Pages - Holds 400 4x6" or 200 5x7" Photos

I made him a scrapbook full of reasons I love him - it doesn't get much more ooey gooey than that, does it? There's not enough room it in for all the reasons.

 
ross and gina sittin in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g
ross and gina sittin in a tree k-i-s-s-i-n-g

The End....

The end is the beginning for the two of us. Since that fateful night we have been inseparable.

Of course we kissed that night, and it was as amazing as you'd like to imagine it was.

I wanted him to stay.

I sent him home

He came back and our next date was out hiking.

We held hands.

He still makes me shy from time to time.

There are no dreams I dream up that he doesn't believe I can accomplish.

He always understands what to say and when to say it.

We talk about marriage and babies and all of the things we want together.

Even though he hates (read: HATES) hospitals, he held my hand when I was there.

He is good to his mother and father (who are still together).

Every day, he tells me I'm beautiful.

I was flipping through one of my journals recently and I found this:

"May 6th, 2012

Once again all is well in my personal self. My soul feels clean and lost in a sense of peace. I don't realize yet how to explain this other than I now feel like everything will be okay. The air smells like spring and my heart is relaxed and anticipatory for a new awakening. Last night I thought if I could just open my heart... today it is open. I'm getting a clearer picture of my future and the baby with little toes and giggles. I can see someone holding that baby and holding me"

I think some may think it's ridiculous, but I think I knew he was coming a long time before he was there. Maybe the power of attraction (see below for more on that) or just a fated recognition.

I asked him that Blue Moon night how he had met me before and I hadn't met him.

He said I walked by him in the office and turned to smile at him just before I left the room, and he hadn't forgotten that smile since.

That's the **** dreams are made of, girls and boys, and let me tell you, it's real.

To say we fell in love would be an understatement...

To Love Forever Would Be A Great Adventure
To Love Forever Would Be A Great Adventure

My Everything

As they say,

there are no words

for love like ours

because the most important words

lie between us,

electrical currents

in the air

unspoken

It is what you feel it in your chest

physically

overwhelming yet calming

tight yet comfortable

promising

exciting

amazing

like a hug from very

center

of myself

It is between parted lips and

open mouths

velvety kisses

entwined fingers

gentle caresses

deep laughter

great adventures

It's being able to be apart

with a preference

of together

and being able to be

together

when we are apart

It is waking up beside you

tangled in your arms

chest to chest

but never quite close enough

even if your breath

is on my skin

It is standing somewhere away

in the middle of my schedule

catching a whiff of your scent

and feeling my heart speed up

in anticipation

of your closeness

once again

It is wanting to open my heart

so I can show you

what I'm certain

is a raging fire

that you set there

and stoked

It is how every day

I love you

so much more than the day before

I may not know if I'll love you more

tomorrow

but I know

I'll never love you

less than today

Love is not always kind

it is ever-learning,

evolving

it is tears of joy

overriding tears of pain

We are not perfect,

you and I

but we are never irreparable

and all I can promise

no matter what happens,

is to always choose

fighting for you

over

fighting with you

These are the reasons I know

that what we have

is untouchable

unbreakable

I love you

Forever

-Gina (That's Me!)

What do you think?

Do you believe in soul mates?

Gina Kisses for Ross
Gina Kisses for Ross

I love you, Ross, because

You make my heart singand skip and my toes curl and my stomach get butterflies

You call me your Butterfly

You give me hope in myself.

... in our future

...for a life I am certain you can give me, because you already do

I love you for understanding how to LET me be sad and how to tell me everything is going to be okay when I don't think it is.

Even when you don't actually say it

I am a better, happier, smarter, more whole woman as a result of you .

I will always seek to improve upon myself and who I am and who I want to be simply because you love me and I love you.

You never ask for anything.

When I was a smoker and you were not you never once asked me to stop

You are sexy, beautiful and more important than anyone to me.

I want to wake up next to you every morning for the rest of our lives and then some.

I am afraid of the end of forever; It isn't long enough to be with you.

My soul is in love with your soul

You don't have to buy me things ( sparkly gel pens or pretty jewelry ) or take me on adventures and you still do.

You encourage my dreams and tell me they're all brilliant even though in hindsight maybe they aren't so great.

You make me want to be a better person . You make me feel I already am.

For once in my life I am 100% certain about something, and that something is you.

Gina's FAVORITE love stories of all time

I'm that girl who will watch these movies over and over until you want to vomit.

The Notebook (2004)
The Notebook (2004)

"I am nothing special, of this I am sure. I am a common man with common thoughts and I've led a common life. There are no monuments dedicated to me and my name will soon be forgotten, but I've loved another with all my heart and soul, and to me, this has always been enough..."- Nicholas Sparks, The NotebookThat's what my love has been like from the get-go. That's what my love is like now. I know if we were separated, he would find a way to get back to my arms; Always.

 
P.S. I Love You (2007)
P.S. I Love You (2007)

From beginning to end, I sob like a fricking baby every single time I see this. It is sad - VERY SAD.

 

A Year of Fun

Click thumbnail to view full-size
He holds me when I'm sadHe holds me when I'm happyWe hike togetherWe hunt together - for treasures, that is.  Though I'd hunt with him too!We hug trees together.He climbs them more...... I climb them less...This is one of my favorites.  I was crying though its hard to tell - he was comforting.This one was taken while Lens-making-adventuring!"To Forever."Sleeping me!  Dax usually forces his way in.  Photobomb!In 2012 he won me a pink elephant cause I "had to have one" and in 2013 I showed up to the fair and said "I dunno, find me a Panda." Of course he did.He holds my hand for dentist appointments.  All of them.He participates in all of my lenses!
He holds me when I'm sad
He holds me when I'm sad
He holds me when I'm happy
He holds me when I'm happy
We hike together
We hike together
We hunt together - for treasures, that is.  Though I'd hunt with him too!
We hunt together - for treasures, that is. Though I'd hunt with him too!
We hug trees together.
We hug trees together.
He climbs them more...
He climbs them more...
... I climb them less...
... I climb them less...
This is one of my favorites.  I was crying though its hard to tell - he was comforting.
This is one of my favorites. I was crying though its hard to tell - he was comforting.
This one was taken while Lens-making-adventuring!
This one was taken while Lens-making-adventuring!
"To Forever."
"To Forever."
Sleeping me!  Dax usually forces his way in.  Photobomb!
Sleeping me! Dax usually forces his way in. Photobomb!
In 2012 he won me a pink elephant cause I "had to have one" and in 2013 I showed up to the fair and said "I dunno, find me a Panda." Of course he did.
In 2012 he won me a pink elephant cause I "had to have one" and in 2013 I showed up to the fair and said "I dunno, find me a Panda." Of course he did.
He holds my hand for dentist appointments.  All of them.
He holds my hand for dentist appointments. All of them.
He participates in all of my lenses!
He participates in all of my lenses!

The Beginning

He asked me to marry him
He asked me to marry him

Why, you might ask, is the beginning at the end?

The story you've been reading is unfolding before your eyes - ever changing, ever evolving.

What was told before was the story of a woman and a man seeing each other for the first time; a story of a blossoming love and all that surrounds it.

Now it's a story of a woman and a man on their way towards marriage; On January 14th 2014 Ross dropped to one knee and asked me to be his wife; his forever; his eternal love.

Stay tuned for our wedding planning right here and thanks for your inclusion in my life :)

Noah Asks Allie Out

Would you have waited that long? Been that patient?

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    • Bill Armstrong profile image

      Bill Armstrong 3 years ago from Valencia, California

      Great story, thanks for sharing with us...now all I have to do is find my sole mate :( Still looking

    • clevergirlname profile image
      Author

      clevergirlname 3 years ago

      @flycatcherrr: Thanks :) So far, so good!

    • flycatcherrr profile image

      flycatcherrr 3 years ago

      Wow. I am so not a mushy person, but you had me hanging on every word. And that line, "As it turns out I do like hiking" - ? Perfect. You two are an adorable couple, and I wish you every happiness together.

    • Brite-Ideas profile image

      Barbara Tremblay Cipak 3 years ago from Toronto, Canada

      I forgot to say CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! yeahhhhhhh!!!!

    • Brite-Ideas profile image

      Barbara Tremblay Cipak 3 years ago from Toronto, Canada

      A beautiful page and when you said he texted you for weeks to get you to go out - I stood my husband up 3 times! before I went out with him - 30+ years later and 4 sons :) now

    • clevergirlname profile image
      Author

      clevergirlname 4 years ago

      @silla lm: Thanks for reading :) We'll be falling in love more every day!

    • silla lm profile image

      silla lm 4 years ago

      What a sweet story, thanks for sharing :)

    • peterb6001 profile image

      Peter Badham 4 years ago from England

      Wow, I feel like I have just spied on you. Very personal and interesting. Hahaha (added for you)

    • GirlUHeardItFrm profile image

      GirlUHeardItFrm 4 years ago

      What a lovely love story! Filled my heart.

    • OhMe profile image

      Nancy Tate Hellams 4 years ago from Pendleton, SC

      Beautiful story. Thanks for sharing.

    • shellys-space profile image

      Shelly Sellers 4 years ago from Midwest U.S.A.

      How romantic! Thanks for sharing your love story :)

    • profile image

      DebMartin 4 years ago

      Sweet.

    • DeeRight profile image

      DeeRight 4 years ago

      I enjoyed reading your lens. It was a wonderful and delighting story. You are a lucky girl and he is a lucky guy. Your story is amazing!

    • Skin-Health profile image

      Skin-Health 4 years ago

      What a beautiful story, and so well written. I couldn't stop reading.

    • EpicEra profile image

      EpicEra 4 years ago

      You bet, I was thirty when I met my hubby/soul mate :)

    • diegocomercio profile image

      diegocomercio 4 years ago

      wow, nice and interesting reading. it was so interesting that i couldn't stop 'till the end. you have some great writing skills. keep it up.

    • amosvee profile image

      amosvee 4 years ago

      Yes, I would. Sweet story, very personal lens.

    • Rosetta Slone profile image

      Rosetta Slone 4 years ago from Under a coconut tree

      What a touching story. I do believe in soulmates, but I also think most people feel their partner is their soulmate after less than a year of being together. It's such an exciting, intense time. My husband and I got married only a few months after meeting, we were so sure about each other. But it's only after several years, living in different countries, and having a child that the strength of our bond has been really proven.

    • profile image

      RoSelou 4 years ago

      The title caught me thinking....'nah, I don't believe soul mate stuff' but then I read. To my surprise, I enjoyed it! Thanks for this beautifully written and inspiring lens! great work!

    • smine27 profile image

      Shinichi Mine 4 years ago from Tokyo, Japan

      I thoroughly enjoyed reading your story. Sweet, truthful and beautiful.

    • sharadkgupta lm profile image

      sharadkgupta lm 4 years ago

      very good lens . Nice story and good representation.

    • sharadkgupta lm profile image

      sharadkgupta lm 4 years ago

      very good lens . Nice story and good representation.

    • profile image

      SamanthaSays 4 years ago

      this is too cute!!!

    • profile image

      prakash-mishra-9212 4 years ago

      Interesting story. Good luck & Best wishes.

    • DANCING COWGIRL profile image

      Dancing Cowgirl Design 4 years ago from Texas

      Awwww so sweet. It is nice to hear a love story come to life the way you told it. Best Wishes to you BOTH!!

    • shewins profile image

      shewins 4 years ago

      Wow, that's quite a story. I'm so happy that you finally got together.

    • profile image

      todalmighty 4 years ago

      Knowing you both and seeing this all happen has been a wonderful experience. <3

    • clevergirlname profile image
      Author

      clevergirlname 4 years ago

      @marktplaatsshop: Thank you :)

    • marktplaatsshop profile image

      marktplaatsshop 4 years ago

      the romance is coming out of my laptop screen, thanks for liking my lens on samsung chromebook and visiting it

    • clevergirlname profile image
      Author

      clevergirlname 4 years ago

      @Magda2012: Thank you for taking the time to read and comment :)

    • clevergirlname profile image
      Author

      clevergirlname 4 years ago

      @NightMagic: Thank you so much! Very sweet to say!

    • clevergirlname profile image
      Author

      clevergirlname 4 years ago

      @knit1tat2: Haha - no uncles! It'll happen and you'll forget about the one that didn't work out so well!

    • clevergirlname profile image
      Author

      clevergirlname 4 years ago

      @takkhisa: Thanks for reading :)

    • clevergirlname profile image
      Author

      clevergirlname 4 years ago

      @techsavvy123: Thank you! I do not take it for granted for sure!

    • WriterJanis2 profile image

      WriterJanis2 4 years ago

      This is all so romantic!

    • NightMagic profile image

      NightMagic 4 years ago

      What a terrific story. It's not to often I read things from start to finish. I've never heard of the Blue Moon until now. Welcome to Squidoo.

    • Magda2012 profile image

      Magda2012 4 years ago

      Romantic love story :) thanks for sharing with us.

    • knit1tat2 profile image

      knit1tat2 4 years ago

      well, hope to find someone again myself, the first didn't work out quite so nicely. But oh my, does he have a lonely Uncle? You do have a winner, and thanks for sharing your story!

    • takkhisa profile image

      Takkhis 4 years ago

      Thanks for sharing your personal story here with us! It is a beautiful story :)

    • profile image

      techsavvy123 4 years ago

      Wonderful! To your success:-)