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Starting Over After 40

Updated on December 6, 2012

Finding The Courage To Start Over

Starting over at any age can be really scary, whether it's starting a new career, going back to school, getting divorced or even getting married. Major life changes often blindside us and turn our World upside down, so we all know how hard it can be to get through life's unexpected ups and downs. Making the choice to initiate a major life change ourselves can be terrifying.

Just the thought of having to start over from scratch after the age of 40 can be absolutely paralyzing. I have unfortunately had to start over in my life countless times, and contrary to what one might think, it never gets any easier. My name is Bambi and this is my story about starting over again after 40.

Sometimes Love Just Isn't Enough

My Story

Recently, after 16 years of being with my husband, I finally found the courage to walk away from our rough & rocky 15 year marriage. People often ask, why I stayed so long if I was so unhappy. It's a valid if naïve question. At first, it's all about love, you tell yourself that it will get better. Then your spouse promises to change if you'll just stay. You want to believe the little lies, you tell yourself that marriage is for better or worse, so you keep hanging on hoping the better part will eventually begin.

In the mean time, years go by and life happens. There are good times as well as bad times, you desperately cling to the good, hoping it will last. In my particular case, during the first five years of my marriage my husband struggled with alcohol addiction & mental health issues. He finally got sober after a short stay in jail & the ultimatum of not being able to come home unless he went to treatment & sobered up. The sobriety stuck, unfortunately the mental health issues that were causing the excessive drinking were never dealt with. He did try to deal with his bi-polar disorder at first, but missed the extreme highs that went away with the medication. He quit taking his meds and soon I was heading for the door.

Then fate intervened, tragedy occurred. He was in a flash fire explosion and burned over 85% of his body. His family pretty much left him for dead, but I didn't. I'm just not the kind of person who kicks someone when they're down. I stood by him, nursed him back to health, and for a while his accident brought us back together. For the next few years, while he needed me to take care of him, things were pretty good. He took his meds and together we survived, but it didn't last.

Eventually, as he became more independent, he quit taking his meds and the downward spiral began again. Then when I lost my job and joined the millions of unemployed Americans, and he lost the lifestyle he had become accustomed to, things quickly went from bad to worse. Rather than step up to the plate and help out, he developed an expensive drug habit, and became increasingly paranoid, anti-social and angry at the World.

Stormy Weather

Picking Up The Pieces

There just comes a point sometimes when you ask yourself, do I really want to keep living like this, always in the path of the storm? Walking away from a bad situation can be really hard to do, especially if you've invested a lot of time, energy and your heart into it. I don't hate my my former spouse, he will always have a place in my heart. When all is said and done, he's not a bad person. After all, I did spend 16 years with him. Yes, he was controlling, verbally & mentally abusive, negative & has mental health & substance abuse issues...But, he was also a good father to my kids, has a fun sense of humor & I believe he did the best he could considering his own personal demons.

It just came to a point where my kids were all grown up and moved out with families of there own, and I realized I had just spent the last 16 plus years of my life taking care of everyone but me. That even though my kids had grown up, my husband never had & never would. That if I ever wanted to pursue my dreams, travel, have fun and find happiness, I was going to have to do it on my own because that just wasn't what he wanted for his future.

He was perfectly content letting me take care of him. He had no interest in traveling or even actually leaving the house if he didn't have to. He could care less what I was doing as long as I fed him when he was hungry and didn't try to change his TV channel. He would have actually preferred if I lived elsewhere & just came over to feed him. He had become more like a pet, or child than a husband.

Still, it wasn't easy to leave. Change is scary, I had been there for 16 years, I wasn't the young adventurous woman I had once been. Then there was the guilt factor, he had become disabled in his accident, and even though I knew that he was perfectly capable of taking care of himself, what would people think? Also, I knew that he would fight me leaving. That the only way I could get away would be to basically run away, leaving just about everything behind and never look back.

When I finally did get up the courage to go, it was even harder than I had anticipated. I did have to leave everything behind other than what I could fit in my Jeep and my cat. Friends and even family reacted to the split even worse, and he fed the fire. I was the bad guy that had deserted him, the poor helpless disabled guy. People were angry with me and let me know it, even my two youngest sons.

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My New Home

Choosing To Live Full-Time In An RV

I've always wanted to travel once the kids were all grown up and moved out. When I first married my former husband, we shared this dream, but after the kids moved out he made every excuse possible not to make it a reality. The big one was that we can't afford it, but maybe by next summer. After two years, and lots of research on my part that indicated that an RV lifestyle would be much more affordable than the money pit house we were in, I finally realized that he really just didn't want to do it.

When I finally found the courage to leave my husband & start over, I thought that my dream of living and traveling in an RV was lost with the marriage. I couldn't possibly do it alone, could I?

Then as I started reviewing my finances and searched for an affordable place to live, I came to realize that adopting a full-time RV lifestyle would actually work better for me than anything else. My monthly income just wasn't enough to afford the high Minnesota apartment rental costs. I could possibly afford to rent a room in a shared house or apartment, but I really didn't want to move in with a complete stranger and hope for the best. Plus I had a cat, which limited my apartment and roommate options.

After reviewing my finances, I had enough money to purchase a nice used motor home, insurance, roadside assistance and all the things I would need to live in it full-time. I also knew from two years of researching RV living that it would be much cheaper for me to afford RV park fees & gas, than rent and utilities in an apartment. In fact the monthly costs of living in an RV was almost half of what it would cost me to live in an apartment.

So, the only thing that was stopping me from living my dream was my own fear of traveling alone. So, I started researching and found out that lots of single women were out there doing just what I wanted to do, they even had an RV club with thousands of members. A lot of them were even much older than me, in their 60's & even 70's. So, the only thing stopping me from living my dream, was me.

Thinking About Living In An RV? - Here Are Some Helpful Books

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Starting A New Life

Getting Ready For Life On The Road

Since I left my marriage with basically just my clothes & a couple of boxes of stuff I couldn't live without, like my laptop, I really was starting over from scratch. This was another factor that helped me decide on becoming a full-time RVer. Motor-homes are basically already furnished, which would save me a ton of money on furniture. I was also lucky enough to find an older model RV that was in excellent shape. An older couple had purchased it to live in while they built a new house, and had refurbished everything in it from the refrigerator to the engine to the water heater.

Still, I wanted to make sure I would be completely comfortable with my new lifestyle before actually hitting the open road. My class C motor-home is considered a mini-motor-home even though it is 26 feet long. First I wanted to be sure I would be comfortable driving such a large vehicle across the Country. Also I wanted to be sure I would be comfortable living in a relatively small confined space.

So, before hitting the open road, I decided to take a couple of short local road trips and then spend a month in a local RV park. This also gave me a chance to become comfortable with the ins & outs of RV living. Time to learn how to empty the sewage tank, hook up the electricity, water & sewer, and how to refill the LP gas, work the generator and other RV maintenance I would need on the road.

Exploring America

Ready To Hit The Open Road

After living in my RV for over a month, I was ready to hit the open road and start exploring America. Having spent most of the last 40 plus years in the sub-zero ice and snow, I was really looking forward to spending the winter somewhere that wasn't sub-zero for most of the winter.

With no real plan, I started driving South and West. Being on the road was a lot of fun and I learned a lot about traveling alone. I also learned pretty fast that I needed to get better at budgeting my money. Constantly traveling can get really expensive really fast, so I started looking for somewhere to settle down for a few months & enjoy my first warm winter in years.

New Mexico
New Mexico

I Love New Mexico

Land of Enchantment

After wandering for a little while, I landed in the middle of nowhere New Mexico and fell in love. New Mexico is beautiful. Almost every day I have been here has been around 70 degrees and sunny. The RV park I'm staying at is walking distance from the Rio Grande river and at the foot of the Caballo Mountains.

Sunsets here are amazing and the people I've met have been wonderful, especially during my first holiday season away from my family. I'm not sure if I'll come back to New Mexico next winter, but I've enjoyed it this year. I think I'll choose to go East and South next year though so I can experience a different travel adventure.

I love My Toaster Oven - An Excellent Investment For The Full-Time RVer

My New Mexico Photo Album

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Thanks For Visiting! - Please Take A Moment To Say Hello

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    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Hello, I read your article and can relate, im a guy whos thinking of getting a used sailboat to live on because mainstream life seems out of reach and getting further by the day, i have a dog whom im not parting with, she needs me and i need her:), Its funny how life turns out sometimes, i wish you the best of luck

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Awww, i love black kitties. Adorable. So, I found your lens encouraging after searching Google for anything titled starting over after 40. I admire your courage and adventurous spirit. Thank you for sharing a piece of yourself and Happy Holidays to you for 2012!!!

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      I will love to share my testimony to all the people in the forum cos i never thought i will have my girlfriend back and she means so much to me..The man i want to get marry to left me 4 weeks to our wedding for another woman..,When i called him, he never picked my calls,he deleted me on his facebook and he changed his facebook status from married to Single...when i went to him to his place of work he told his boss he never want to see me..I lost my job as a result of this cos i can't get myself anymore,my life was upside down and everything did not go smooth with my life...I tried all i could do to have him back to all did not work out until i met a Man when i Travel to Africa to execute some business have been developing some years back..I told him my problem and all have passed through in getting him back and how i lost my job...he told me he gonna help me...i don't believe that in the first place.but he swore he will help me out and he told me the reason why my boyfriend left me and also told me some hidden secrets.i was amazed when i heard that from him..he said he will cast a spell for me and i will see the results in the next couple of days..then i travel back to US the following day and i called him when i got home and he said he's busy casting those spells and he has bought all the materials needed for the spells,he said am gonna see positive results in the next 2 days that is Thursday...My boyfriend called me at exactly 12:35pm on Thursday and apologies for all he had done thanks be to DR SAMBOL contact him on his email drsambolspelltemple@gmail.com

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Really enjoyed visiting. You are so brave and I wish you all the best in your new adventure. Will keep you in my prayers. Have fun and be safe!

    • SMW1962 LM profile image

      SMW1962 LM 5 years ago

      Thanks for the inspiration!

    • Joan Haines profile image

      Joan Haines 5 years ago

      You are such a resilient woman. Cheers to you for starting over.

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Nice Lens! Starting over at 40 can be tough

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      That was very encouraging, I'd like you to hear my experience and see what you think in relation to getting up on onward, my email is kelrunner321@yahoo.co.uk

      Peace

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      That was very encouraging, I'd like you to hear my experience and see what you think in relation to getting up on onward, my email is kelrunner321@yahoo.co.uk

      Peace

    • profile image

      anonymous 5 years ago

      Aging gracefully with a good health is not just a task. Many people go into depression in this phase of life. Thanks for this sharing.

      - Protein shakes - http://www.permalean.com/

    • sandyjunep lm profile image

      sandyjunep lm 6 years ago

      Love your lens. I think it is great that people are starting over at 40. i did and now I am 50 and doing it again. Life is wonderful

    • profile image

      anonymous 6 years ago

      Wow, I came across this because I am turning 40 left my husband and packing just my clothes and starting a new life in Italy. After 18 years of marriage I finally said enough. I admire you and you have given me extra courage to go ahead with my plan. Thank You and good luck.

    • pimbels lm profile image

      pimbels lm 6 years ago

      Very inspiring. I wish you all the best. Great lens, thank you.

    • Mayapearl profile image

      Mayapearl 6 years ago

      What an amazing woman you are! I do think your RV is super cool and I hope you have the best of fun.

    • profile image

      anonymous 6 years ago

      Love reading about the change I am thinking about hitting the road as an rv'er full time. I plan to rent one and take some long weekend trips before I make the final decision. I am 62 and I figure I will never do it any younger.

    • profile image

      nabiel_mansour 6 years ago

      good live

    • profile image

      ambrking 6 years ago

      I wish you luck. Have a great life, we only get to live once.

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      ohcaroline 6 years ago

      Dropped back by to leave a blessing. Happy Valentine's Day.

    • mekon1971 profile image

      mekon1971 6 years ago

      Awesome life choice, good to not be bound to a mortgage! Enjoy your freedom!

    • justholidays profile image

      justholidays 6 years ago

      Wow! I'm amazed by your new life, Bambi, and wish you to be as happy as you deserve with your new way of life. Starting over after 40 isn't easy, I know... but I'm sure you'll realize your dreams.

    • profile image

      miaponzo 6 years ago

      Scary but you can do it.. I have!!!! :)

    • Luminosity LM profile image

      Luminosity LM 6 years ago

      I went to new mexico to see the view and I was not disappointed.

    • Retro Loco profile image

      Vicki 6 years ago from USA

      Hi Bambi, I admire your devotion to your former husband and your brevity for letting go and branching out on your own! I lived alone for 15 years, so I know what it's like out there! It can be really tough. I wish you, Scrapper & Boo~Boo kitty the very best in life & loads of happiness! Have fun in your travels and be safe. I enjoyed reading your lens....the good and the bad. ~Vicki~

    • EuroSquid LM profile image

      EuroSquid LM 6 years ago

      Great lens. Blessed!

    • HeatherTodd1 profile image

      HeatherTodd1 6 years ago

      Great lens ..God bless u

    • Hairdresser007 profile image

      James Jordan 6 years ago from Burbank, CA

      good luck to you a very positive viewpoint

    • surfer1969 lm profile image

      surfer1969 lm 6 years ago

      I always wanted to lived that kind of life.But to many people need me here right now like my dad.I'm hoping that once I start to make some money on the web that I'll be able to helped him and myself out too.

    • Philippians468 profile image

      Philippians468 6 years ago

      your courage inspires me! thank you for such a wonderful lens! God bless you! cheers

    • profile image

      vickeylynn 6 years ago

      I admire your courage... You took a bad situation and turned it around for you... This is a great story... Good Luck...

    • profile image

      CarolMerc 6 years ago

      Hi Mystic Mama :-)

      first of all congratulations on being able to leave your husband. Then, I admire the currage people have to have to start over, especially in certain age...

      This is an excellent topic to open and encourage other people by your own example.

      All the best,

      Carol at razor e300

    • darciefrench lm profile image

      darciefrench lm 6 years ago

      Adding to Dear Squidoo under starting over on Squidoo (one way or another). Many blessings to you in your new life.

    • profile image

      anonymous 6 years ago

      Ever since I first read this lens, I had it in my mind that as soon as I became an Angel it would get a blessing. So.....Blessed by an Angel

    • venitalynn profile image

      venitalynn 6 years ago

      Ohh thanks so much for sharing your story! It's refreshing to find such honesty on the Web. I have to say - RV living looks way more appealing to me now!

    • PizmoBeach LM profile image

      PizmoBeach LM 6 years ago

      I was very moved and inspired by your story.

    • Laniann profile image

      Laniann 6 years ago

      Bambi, wishing you all the best in your new adventure. You will meet new friends as you travel and I hope you find someone special to share your new life with.

    • Dianne Loomos profile image

      Dianne Loomos 6 years ago

      I hope you will keep us updated as to how you are adjusting to RV life. Best of luck to you.

    • Kiwisoutback profile image

      Kiwisoutback 6 years ago from Massachusetts

      This must be a painful yet exciting time for you. Look ahead to the future - I've road tripped down south a few times and it was a blast every single time - though I was in a passenger car in the summer, so I didn't have all of the amenities while on the road. Enjoy it!

    • profile image

      anonymous 6 years ago

      I admire your courage to go out on your own and be true to yourself. I think living in an RV may be a good thing, because you have to have less and this is good. We tend to fill our homes with too much. Of course, you do need a computer :) I wish you well.

    • profile image

      anonymous 6 years ago

      Anyone that thinks or says leaving a marriage is easy was never fully vested in their marriage. It is extremely painful, hopes are forever dashed, the life you envisioned is over, and it is just plain scary! Then of course is the guilt! You did all you could, and it didn't work. This is not a reflection upon you - it just happens sometimes. Marriage is too easy to get into, and people don't realise that we change as we age, and our plans for the future often have to change too, and then one day you wake up and realise you are both on different paths. I applaud your courage and conviction, and trust that you are on the road to a better life and all the happiness in the world. Thank you so much for sharing this story!

    • CCGAL profile image

      CCGAL 6 years ago

      I did not know this about you - we have more in common than I realized. Anyway, wanted to let you know that I've featured this on some of my lenses that pertain to RV living. Plus I'm adding it to my list of lenses I want to bless next time I'm an angel on Squidoo.

    • LoKackl profile image

      LoKackl 7 years ago

      An RV! Now there's an idea. I may see you on the road, Bambi! Wonderful talent you have for telling your story and for including da reader in your journey. I'd say your RV is tied to a star! As per usual, I think of a Dickinson poem: "Much madness is divinest sense/Much sense the starkest madness...."

    • RuthCoffee profile image

      RuthCoffee 7 years ago

      You're a brave woman. Leaving had to be really, really difficult, but I'm thrilled that you're living your dream. I hope to keep up with your adventures!

    • ElizabethSheppard profile image

      Elizabeth Sheppard 7 years ago from Bowling Green, Kentucky

      It was awesome reading this lens. Thank you for sharing about your life. You sound like a brave and strong person. I am proud to know you here on Squidoo.

    • OhMe profile image

      Nancy Tate Hellams 7 years ago from Pendleton, SC

      Thank you for sharing your story. You are very brave and I wish you much happiness in your new venture.

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      TWOnline2 7 years ago

      good for you

    • profile image

      Allie8020 7 years ago

      Hi Bambi! Thank you for sharing your amazing story. It's tough to be perceived as the "bad guy" when you've given your ex-husband plenty of chances to make better choices. Please check out the book "Eat, Pray, Love" -- it was written by Elizabeth Gilbert when she was going through her divorce -- and it might help you deal with some of the issues your going through. I thought it was so inspirational. Hang in there!

      Allie

    • Lady Lorelei profile image

      Lorelei Cohen 7 years ago from Canada

      Thank you for sharing this...you are an amazing person. Through your internet writings you have made so many online friends that no matter where you are you will never be alone. Wishing you a very Merry Christmas and a happy and prosperous New year.

    • profile image

      ohcaroline 7 years ago

      I'm so proud of you. You will make it, no doubt. Go fulfill your dreams, have a blast, and live life to the fullest. You deserve it.

    • RaintreeAnnie profile image

      RaintreeAnnie 7 years ago from UK

      You are a very strong, and brave woman and you told your story with integrity and courage. Wishing you a wonderful future. Hugs

    • profile image

      AllyVuitton 7 years ago

      I really admire ones like you, who feel confident enough to tell your rocky story to the whole world! (Applause).

    • EditPhotos profile image

      Edit Photos 7 years ago from Earth

      I guess you get Internet access in an RV these days! Great lens - great courage

    • jptanabe profile image

      Jennifer P Tanabe 7 years ago from Red Hook, NY

      Thanks for sharing this stage in your voyage! I remember reading some of your earlier lenses, and this one is just as honest and in a way more inspiring. Hope you have a great time in your RV, and remember to return to Minnesota when spring comes!

    • puerdycat lm profile image

      puerdycat lm 7 years ago

      Good for you. Keep looking on the sunny side. Happy RVing, sweetie.

    • LizMac60 profile image

      Liz Mackay 7 years ago from United Kingdom

      You are one brave lady. I've experienced two late divorces and now live on my own and love it. All power to your elbow. Blessed by a squid angel.

    • MargoPArrowsmith profile image

      MargoPArrowsmith 7 years ago

      You are amazing. I lensrolled this to 60 new 40 and will keep it there, but this is much more profound

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      ShafaqMehndiArt 7 years ago

      Best of luck.

    • retta719 profile image

      Loretta 7 years ago from United States

      I think the In A flash lens was the first lens I read of yours on Squidoo way back quite awhile ago when I first starting to really get into Squidoo and building lenses. I think it's great that you're leaving those lenses in place because they offer such an amazing story, but I'm also glad that you're moving on and doing it in such a beautiful and bold way. You rock :)

    • CozyKitty profile image

      CozyKitty 7 years ago

      Your story, and the way you told it, was so touching. Always remember how strong you are, and enjoy your new beginnings. Wishing you a fantastic journey!

      ;-)

    • Dawn Michael PhD profile image

      Dawn Michael 7 years ago from Thousand Oaks

      Great story thanks for sharing. I am a marriage counselor and I for the most part help my clients stay together but then there are time when I also help my clients separate. when a marriage is toxic and it sounds like yours was then it is time to leave. I applaud you, because it sounds like you really tried and made the best of a very bad situation and now you have a second chance to live and start a new life. Live your life with excitement and joy on your new journey. Best of luck!!!

    • profile image

      scar4 7 years ago

      Your story makes me feel ashamed of mine. I lacked the courage to start over a new life, but now I believe it's easy to carry out. May God Bless You!

    • darciefrench lm profile image

      darciefrench lm 7 years ago

      This is really cool that you're starting a new life- and in an RV too. We lived in one for a month a couple years ago- was going to move the hubby and kid to arizona to start over. I wondered if you'd left your husband- one could see the pain you were going through trying to make it work. I can also see now where your comments on caring for mystics may have come from- having just experienced such mental health dysfunction in a marriage. I am angel blessing and featuring on November Blessings under personal stories- sometimes, we just have to leave for our own sanity, there's no other way. Much love and many blessings to you.

    • Addy Bell profile image

      Addy Bell 7 years ago

      Thanks for having the courage to share this. Congratulations on getting out of your bad situation, and on having the strength to take care of yourself after caring for so many others for so many years.

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      ZazzleEnchante 7 years ago

      Exceptional, is how I'll put it, describing this lens...blessed by a SquidAngel

    • profile image

      magicalstrollingreg 7 years ago

      RVing sounds like boatloads of fun so long as you can support yourself and pay your bills. I love to travel, so it sounds appealing. Thanks for visiting my lens mysticmama.

    • sheriangell profile image

      sheriangell 7 years ago

      Wishing you so much peace and happiness in this new chapter of your life. It takes incredible courage to change, particularly big life changes like yours. God bless you.

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      anonymous 7 years ago

      Reading your story makes me more courageous and strengthens the point that there is always hope at the end of the tunnel. Not everyone is brave enough to take hard decisions in life, your lens inspires and motivated to take that one bold step.....

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      IonaMoon 7 years ago

      Hi there. I am new here and have just read the incredible, and incredible told, story of your ex-husband's accident and your efforts to save him, and now the story of your seeking the light and a new life for yourself. Your experiences are extreme, and much more than most of us ever see (thank God!) I appreciate you have documented them and continue to share them as a whole. Thank you.

      Also, on a more morbid note, the ad for the toaster oven gave me the willies after reading about the injury...

      Best of luck to you in whatever you tackle next. It would appear you already know you have no limits!

    • Virginia Allain profile image

      Virginia Allain 7 years ago from Central Florida

      Thanks for sharing the hard decisions you had to face in starting over. I look forward to seeing how your new life evolves. Keep us posted.

      This should provide useful information to others facing such a situation.

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      editionh 7 years ago

      Best of luck on the roads and elsewhere!

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      anonymous 7 years ago

      Incredibly nice to meet you! I am inspired! Starting over in this new career at 43! Best to you always.........

    • teamlane profile image

      teamlane 7 years ago

      Wow, an incredible story Bambi! We have a trailer we tow and take long vacations in it. It's a lot of fun to travel with your house on you back!

    • SusanDeppner profile image

      Susan Deppner 7 years ago from Arkansas USA

      Your story is definitely inspiring and I wish you the very best of everything in your new lifestyle. Being able to move everything easily and head south for the winter then north for the summer sounds like a fabulous way to live! And I mean REALLY live.

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      seegreen 7 years ago

      Very few have the courage to do what you have done, I just want to give you a huge hug right now. I wish that I was still living in the US so you could visit! I've driven cross country in the US several times and I've met a lot of people in campgrounds, mostly retired, absolutely loving the RV lifestyle. I really hope you write some lenses on the places that you visit.

    • Sylvestermouse profile image

      Cynthia Sylvestermouse 7 years ago from United States

      Oh, Bambi, two major changes at once! Bless your heart! I sincerely hope you get to realize many, many of your dreams and that you will find complete happiness. Happy travels to you!

    • Mrmakingusmile LM profile image

      Mrmakingusmile LM 7 years ago

      You make excellent points. Thanks for making me smile.

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      anonymous 7 years ago

      Your courage and optimism inspire me. Starting over after 40 can be daunting to say the least. Prayers for you in your travels and new adventures.

    • Grasmere Sue profile image

      Sue Dixon 7 years ago from Grasmere, Cumbria, UK

      Wishing you all the best with your brave new life .Hugs.

    • ChemKnitsBlog2 profile image

      ChemKnitsBlog2 7 years ago

      You have some real inner strength to share your experiences like this. I'm glad that you're not deleting lenses about things that happened earlier in your life! Good luck.

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      Light-in-me 7 years ago

      I am so glad to see you back. I had wondered what had happened and checked your profile several times to see if you were around. I admire your courage and honesty and wish you happiness. Take care of yourself, I hope for the very best for you!

      Robin :)

    • ICanCook profile image

      ICanCook 7 years ago

      I would so love to live in an RV. Also, it takes more courage to leave a relationship that is not working than it does to stay. Good luck to you.

    • ajgodinho profile image

      Anthony Godinho 7 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      Wishing you much love, happiness and peace, Bambi. Life can be tough, but I think it only makes us stronger. Being out of one's comfort zone is a good thing, at least that's the way I look at things. It helps me trust in the Lord more and exercise faith that otherwise I probably wouldn't. If you're ever in the GTA, Ontario, Canada give me a shout...peace!

    • LisaAuch1 profile image

      Lisa Auch 7 years ago from Scotland

      Well I am honoured to meet you, I love the fact YOU have done exactly what YOU want to do for YOU! I am completley jealous of you and your lifestyl! it is a dream of mine to be able to do exactly what you have done, i had to unplug the laptop so i could keep reading this whilst putting on the dinner. I am glad I can also sprinkle a little Angel Dust over this lens May you be happy on your journey and if you ever come to Scotland the kettle is always on! ~Blessed by a passing Angel~

    • JenOfChicago LM profile image

      JenOfChicago LM 7 years ago

      Glad to see you back - and I can't wait to read more about your adventures!

    • Wendy L Henderson profile image

      Wendy Henderson 7 years ago from PA

      What a cool thing you are doing. If you happen to be in Maryland let me know and I'll have you over for dinner! Welcome back to Squidoo!

    • luvmyludwig lm profile image

      luvmyludwig lm 7 years ago

      It's great to see you back here, Mega love to you.

    • poptastic profile image

      Cynthia Arre 7 years ago from Quezon City

      I admire your courage Bambi and I want to thank you for sharing your story with us. I read the lens you made about the burn accident many months ago (and I remember blessing it then). I'm sorry that the marriage didn't work out but it seems like you have a very exciting adventure up ahead and I look forward to reading all about it soon. ~Blessed~

    • Wednesday-Elf profile image

      Wednesday-Elf 7 years ago from Savannah, Georgia

      Major lifestyle changes are hard, but you have found what you needed to find - a life of your own following your dream. I've just made a major change myself, leaving the warm South after 17 years to return to the Midwest, so I understand a bit about upheaval and change. Wishing you the best of everything in your new RV lifestyle adventures.

      ~~Blessed by a SquidAngel~~

    • KarenHC profile image

      Karen 7 years ago from U.S.

      I remember reading the lens about your husband's accident, and being mesmerized by it. I'm sorry there wasn't a completely happy ending after that lens, but I think you made the right decision, and now you have this wonderful adventure ahead of you. You can live for yourself now, after taking care of others for so long. I look forward to hearing more about your life on the road.

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      anonymous 7 years ago

      Congratulations on taking the steps to a happy and free life Bambi. I know what its like to be married to someone like you describe. At some point self preservation has to be taken seriously. I wish you all the best, and maybe some day I'll join you on the open road and see parts of this wonderful country I'd like to see. You did good, some times we have to make a mess in order to clean one up. ~ Awesome! XOs

    • Charlino99 profile image

      Tonie Cook 7 years ago from USA

      It is so good to see and hear from you again. I haven't met a person yet who has not gone through life without experiencing a myriad of trials and tribulations. Your taking the time to share your experience with others will, no doubt, inspire courage and perseverance for those who find themselves in similar situations. May all your adventure roads be a safe and happy ones.

    • kimmie1967 profile image

      kimmie1967 7 years ago

      I want to echo a lot of what has been said here, I am very glad you are back. I know the kind of courage it takes to leave a situation, even if it is bad it is what you know, so good for you. You deserve to be happy. I have always wanted to get an RV but don't know that I could live in one or do it alone, not sure I could drive the darn thing. If you ever make it to western Colorado I would love it if we could meet.

      Lots of well wishes and good thoughts are coming your way from me.

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      Sojourn 7 years ago

      I'm glad you didn't come back as someone else. The inspiration you have provided here for others would have been hidden and what a waste that would have been! Starting over doesn't mean getting rid of all of "you" - it means shaking off the layers that didn't belong so the best of you can shine through. When I saw your name in the forum I came only to say hi and kick over a few monster points...little did I know! Congratulations on following your dream no matter how hard it had to be. Revel in your strength! You can't buy that... ;)

    • profile image

      anonymous 7 years ago

      Courageous. Kudos. Nice lens. I love how you are open and honest.

    • VarietyWriter2 profile image

      VarietyWriter2 7 years ago

      Happy Trails Bambi. Hit me up if you ever travel to sunny Cali. I'd love to meet you! Best of luck and wishing you much happiness.

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      GrowWear 7 years ago

      So good to see you back, Bambi! Your new lifestyle sounds wonderful. Much admiration for you and your strength to fulfill your dreams.

    • Paula Atwell profile image

      Paula Atwell 7 years ago from Cleveland, OH

      I wish you the best in your new career of being well, you. :) I think we all take a look back and reassess around the age of 40, I did as well, with different types of changes, but it put me on the road that I am now.

      I travel with you in heart, because I would love to do what you are doing, and am sending lots of positive thoughts your way. I am excited for you, and know that you will be finding some really cool adventures on the road to your new path.

    • profile image

      anonymous 7 years ago

      Oh Bambi I am so pleased to see you back on Squidoo and that you are manging to sort things out and live the life YOU want for yourself. I too started over, I split up with my first husband and spent 5 very lonely years trying to make a decent life for my children. And my 40th birthday was when I truly started over with a man who is the rock of my life.

      My one disappointment is that I doubt you will be travelling over to the UK in your RV......

      Thank you for being so brave and for sharing your story with us - as Kathy says, many of us will be able to identify with parts of your story. I am inspired by you and I am sure others will be too :)

    • KathyMcGraw2 profile image

      Kathy McGraw 7 years ago from California

      Many of us can identify with different parts of your story. It is indeed hard to leave and make those kinds of decisions, but as you see once you make them it becomes easier. Before I lost my house to foreclosure I was thinking of doing the same thing...it just didn't work out for me, but so glad it did for you. Happy Trails and I have a very long driveway in So Cal a few hours over the border from Arizona...anytime you're around would love to meet. Blessing this lens :)

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      grannysage 7 years ago

      Wow, what a powerful story. I applaud your new empowerment and have a knowing that this move is great for you. I don't like the words, "what will people think?" I heard that a lot from my ex. I hope we can meet up when we get our RV. By then you will know all the tricks.

    • Heather426 profile image

      Heather Burns 7 years ago from Wexford, Ireland

      Yay for you Bambi, what a great lens about starting over. You can do it girl! I did it too, just not in an RV. Drama free is the only way to live. Good luck, and California is warm all year, at least Southern California is....