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to be married or not to marry

Updated on March 25, 2013

to be married or not to marry

Why would someone want to be married? Why would someone want to go through living with someone who may die before them? Do you know what it's like to loss a loved one? Someone who's close to you? I do! I lost my son. That changed me inside-out in more ways then I could have ever imagined. It gave me more compassion for those who hurt. (1 peter 3:8 Finally, all of you, be like-minded, be sympathetic, love one another, be compassionate and humble.) I have a friend who lost her husband and I feel deep sadness not only for her, for their children as well. So why would anybody want to even think of getting married, when you have to go through such hell. Paul wrote in the scriptures blessed is he who is single. (In all you do, I want you to be free from worry. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord's work and thinking how to please him. But a married man can't do that so well; he has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. His interests are divided. It is the same with a girl who marries. She faces the same problem. A girl who is not married is anxious to please the Lord in all she is and does. But a married woman must consider other things such as housekeeping and the likes and dislikes of her husband. I am saying this to help you, not to try to keep you from marrying. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few other things as possible to distract your attention from my opinion she will be happier if she doesn't marry again.1 Corinthians 7:32-35,40 , LVB). For me, that would be the most wonderful experience. To live a pure life dedicated to Jesus and his cause. Why not-you wouldn't have to hurt if a loved one dies. You'd be free to do what you want, when you want, without having to ask for permission. Go on mission trips, volunteer, work whatever hours you wanted, without having to get home to a warm cozy embrace. That is if your lucky to be married to such a person, who gives embraces as such. I'm not so lucky BUT I do have to answer to others, cook and clean up after others. I can't just get up and leave when ever I want to go on a mission trip or volunteer. I do get to rush home to get those warm embraces. Why? I have 3 wonderful children living with me and I have one big one that I used to worry about like heck :) (Luke 12:25 Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to your life?) I wouldn't trade it for anything though. I love what I do, what I've been called to do. Children are a blessing sent striaght from God. (Mark 9:37 “Whoever receives one of these little children in My name receives Me; and whoever receives Me, receives not Me but Him who sent Me.”) What I would trade is the fact that my son died at 18, he left us two wonderful gifts, my grand babies. So my question is, why would I or anybody want to be married? Single life is great!! Being a single parent is wonderful at times and of course challenging at the worst of times. All people with children have challenges whether your married or not.

If your married to a wonderful husband with or without kids, who loves you as God loves the church (Eph 25 Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, 26 that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word), who embraces every moment with you and his family, whom you have common ground and goals with-then it's Good!! "It's the way it's suppose to be" as one lady said to me. You gain yourself a help mate (Genesis 2:18 And the LORD God said, “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.”), one who stands by your side stronger then a three corded strand. (Ecclesiastes 4:12 Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken). One who only has eyes for you and loves your sweet kiss'. One who speaks highly of you to his friends and co-workers and when you have a problem stands by your side through it all with listening ears and an open heart to let you heal in your own way and time. (Ecclesiastes 3:4 there's a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance) To laugh and rejoice together over the little things in life. That's why one would want to be marry.

Of course the down fall is that you risk and what they say about risk is true. "If you don't take a risk then you risk to fail". Getting married and having children is risky. You risk losing them to death, for all will die and see the Creator (1 Corinthians 15:22 For as in Adam all die, so in Christ all will be made alive). If you don't marry then you also fail to embrace the fullness of love. The only kind of love that can be experienced between a man and women, a parent and her/his child. You risk losing out on really great and fun moments. You risk losing out on hearing your grandchildren laugh and giggle as they play, well you rest in peace, knowing you can send them home.

Really, it's a huge risk staying single or getting married, either choice we all die in the end. For me, one day I want to take that risk. Find someone who God breathes into my life, that one special person that brings joy to my day when I say his name. Who, when I hug, I can feel that warm embrace, no matter what kind of mood I'm in. One that I can worship, pray and study with. One day, I will find that someone special that I'm willing to work with, to make a wonderful home together. One that my Heavenly Father approves of.

Yes, one of us will die before the other knowing that we will see each other again, face to face in the kingdom of Heaven. The survivor will go through hell and yet lean on Jesus for their strength and joy. Knowing that God promises to be the father to the fatherless and the companion to the widow's (Psalm 68:5 A father of the fatherless, a defender of widows,Is God in His holy habitation) (Isaiah 54:5 For your Maker is your husband, the LORD Almighty is his name the Holy One of Israel is your Redeemer; he is called the God of all the earth. To turn our mourning into Joy and give us a hope and a future for all eternity (Jeremiah 31:13 Then young women will dance and be glad, young men and old as well. I will turn their mourning into gladness; I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow) (Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.)

To be married or not to marry is a choice everyone will have to take. Risk it wisely!!


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    • Nastasia profile image


      7 years ago

      I love your hub. Awesome! Be sure to stop by read some of mine and follow me.


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