- Gender and Relationships
Who is a true friend? He is a treasure!
The manna of your life!
‘A true friend is someone who is there for you when he'd rather be anywhere else.’ – Len Wein
Whom do you feel easy to confide in?
Is it your parents or friends?
Most of you would say that it is your friends. Why do you feel that you can share all your thoughts with your friends? With your parents, you fear about their reaction which you sometimes dislike. But with your friends you need not have any such reservations. You can say anything you feel and be relaxed in their company as they always support you.
What are the hallmarks of a good friend?
- He should always support you.
- He should be encouraging.
- He should be frank with you.
- He must guard your secrets.
- He must be happy for your success.
- He must be unhappy for your defeat.
You have identical wavelength with your friends and so find it easy and a pleasure to be with them. Friends are very necessary in life for sharing your inner most feelings and thoughts. You can talk anything with your friends and you can be your true self with them. A good friend is a gift, a treasure and a good companion.
He should be there in your times of need and also extend his hands in helping support. He should be absolutely trustworthy and dependable. He should have ears when you confess and not open his mouth with others to make your secret an open one. The hallmark of a true friend is always sympathetic ears to listen to you and clamped mouth to keep your secrets within him.
When you are down with depression, he should pep you up by being encouraging. When you are venturing into something new he should be enthusiastic. When you are facing problems, he must be in your side and when you have success he should share it with happiness.
He should give good advice.
He should be straight forward with you and have your well being in his mind. He should call a spade a spade and make you understand your mistakes and should have the capacity to turn you to the right path. He should have the courage to reprimand you when you deviate from your duties and bring you to your sense.
There is one category of friends who are actually your enemies with the cloak of friendship shrouding their true identity. These so called friends take you to the wrong path of destruction and make you take to drugs and alcohol. When you refuse they would not let you go and insist that you try it out. You are forced into destructive habits because of these so called friends and you slowly drown your life in their vicious company.
Know the true face of your friends.
There are some friends who pull the rug right from your feet and you should be wary of such friends. He is with you as a friend, but he is sneaky enough to steal your opportunities and smart enough to keep a calm facade so that you do not realize his true nature.
Another group of friends cling to you in your times of success and fame and disappear like a whiff of air once you taste defeat. These people are a shame to the concept of friendship. You should completely sever ties with such people and you will not be a loser in any way.
Who is a true friend?
A true friend is someone who is beside you in your defeat and victory. You can rely on him to keep your secrets and he has your welfare in mind when he gives you advice. When you fall, he is there to lift you up morally and gives you confidence that you will win.
‘A true friend freely, advises justly, assists readily, adventures boldly, takes all patiently, defends courageously, and continues a friend unchangeably.’ William Penn.
When you are successful, your friend should be happy and not jealous. When you are defeated he should feel a pang in his heart and not inwardly gloat at your rout. He should be like a mirror to reflect your feelings and like a guide to make you better. You should consider yourself a lucky person if you find such a person.
He should know his limits.
He might be your close friend, but he too has his limits. If you are married, he should know that you are a family man and so you have to spend your time with your family. If he calls you and barges into your family time, your spouse is going to resent him. He should give enough space for you to be with your family and also give you the impression that he will always be there when you need him.
If he gossips about his other friends, you can be sure he will gossip about you also. You should not trust such gossip mongers. Does he give you full attention when you are talking with him? If so he is truly interested in your well being. But if he half listens and looks elsewhere, or checks his mobile often, he is a pretending friend. You do not need such friends. they add to the number of friends you have, nothing more.
He should act as a bridge.
Friendship should be like a bridge which helps you to cross over to safety. You might be drowning in the rough sea of defeat and your friend should act as a bridge to take you to the other side of victory.
© 2011 mathira