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Romantic Instinct: How to Determine If Your Relationship is the Real Deal

Updated on December 22, 2019
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Heather has a Bachelor's Degree in English from Moravian College and has been freelance writing for more than 15 years.

Can you look into your partner's eyes and see love, or the exit sign?
Can you look into your partner's eyes and see love, or the exit sign?

Love is never having to say you're sorry or being a cliche. Well, that's my ideal interpretation of love based on the movie Love Story and personal experience. Being in love is based on each particular person and how they view life. I personally have not experienced anything as intense as love. I've been close but not quite. My potential suitors have not met my requirements to earn a serious interest. Knowing when you're in love is relative to your comfort levels and the strength of your current relationship. Being in love isn't on a time table but is freeing feeling you get when you confess your heart's desire.

My idea of being in love with someone is knowing you can trust them completely and they have your best interests at heart. You can confide in your partner openly and they won't judge you. Love is also having to compromise with your mate. You go to the places they want to go even when you'd be bored to tears. Allow them to trust you all their important goals and secrets. Support them through professional and personal setbacks. I want a partner I can trust to challenge me and allow me to be myself without laughing in my face. My partner needs to give me the space to be comfortable with the relationship before writing me off completely. Unfortunately, I've been written off too many times by suitors who didn't trust me enough to go the distance.

Saying the words "I love you" has never been my strong suit in a relationship. I've never been comfortable enough to say them to any partner. There have been times where dates blurted out the words without any hesitation. I said it back with one guy because he was the type to have taken offense if I didn't respond right away. Of course, I didn't mean anything I said. I was at an age where real love was a foreign concept. I wasn't ready to trust it or him. Soon after the relationship came undone just as quickly as he uttered thos words.

When the time is right, I'll say the three magic words to my special someone on my time table. I'm longer going to be pressured into doing or saying anything I don't mean or want to. Honesty is the best policy when it comes to love or a lack thereof. If I end up alone, it's better to be truthful than stuck in a loveless relationship. Hopefully, I'll find love on my own time and without the pressure to settle with someone less than suitable for me.


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