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How to select the Right Life Partner

Updated on December 15, 2013

Beauty can never replace ethics. Throughout our life, we need to make really decisive decisions. One of those vital decisions is selection of the right person whom we spend the entire life with. That is to say, marriage can both make and destroy your life. Marriage can gift you both unlimited joys and unlimited sorrows. Let us discusses some fundamental issues of how and why people choose their spouse. There are a number of reasons for which people select their life partner. People have different choices while finding and selecting their life partner. That is to say, choices of selecting life partner differ and are subjective. But still there are some major qualities for which people seek while choosing their partner. What are those characteristics? There are four major criteria that people look after to select their spouse.

The very first criterion is the wealth. It is more commonplace, especially in third world countries. People select their life partner who are rich and are wealthy. If he or she has factories, land, property, luxurious cars and great bank balance, people promptly try to select him or her their life partner. This means people who lead a luxurious life are supposed to be chosen as life partner. However, I strongly disagree with this idea. If you select your spouse only for her or his wealth, then they will treat you like his/her wealth and will seldom give you the sense of life partner which will lead you to troubles. Secondly, wealth is to disappear and consume fully one day. So, when his or her wealth is gone, then your reason of selecting that person is finished. Also, capital is not going to stay throughout the life, so selecting someone as your spouse only on the basis of wealth is not a wise idea.

The second standard people seek while selecting their spouse is the beauty. If people find out or meet someone beautiful, then they try to marry her. They fall in love with such beautiful and charming girls such as Katrina Kaif. People are captured by their natural beauties and finally they make their decision to marry her. They admire her candid eyes, straight nose, slim body, pink lips, while cheeks, pearl like teeth and many more unique beauties. After realizing and observing these beauties, people fall in love with them and finally marry such girls. In short, beauty and looking good is another characteristic on the basis of which people select their spouse.

The third criterion that people consider while finding out their life partner is the high profile people. If someone belongs to an upper class family with good status in the society, then most of the people struggle to marry him or her. People with good fame mostly draw the attention of others which is why people try to get married with such famous people in the society. In summary, people are more likely to marry someone with good fame.

The last but not the least principle that people consider while choosing their spouse is the ethics/morality. Albert Einstein says,Whoever is careless with the truth in small matters cannot be trusted with important matters”. So, people who have good moral values really attract people around them. Their words really attract others and their attitude allures people. They make friends anywhere they live, stay or visit. People enjoy and enjoy being with such polite people. Every one respects such well behaved people. People notice their existence and miss their absenteeism. Their friends really like to stay with such people. Slowly and gradually, slowly and gradually people are fully captured with great moral principles of such people and finally intend to marry her or him for his or her unique quality which is ethics and morality.

The Conclusion

As discussed above, there are four major criteria people seek while selecting their spouse. Those principles are wealth, physical appearance, good status and ethics. The luckiest people are those who marry someone with four qualities. They would enjoy each and every phase of the life as they have married someone so special in the world. If you marry someone with these qualities, then you, in fact, find gold. You are still lucky if you marry someone who is polite and wealthy or high profile. But the most important quality that we must consider and never compromise is the ethics of someone whom we want to marry. No matter how much beautiful she is even like Katrina Kaif, one day her beauty is to be lost as it is one of the realities of life. Also no matter how much wealthy he or she is, one day the wealth is to be lost. Cash, property and other assets never accompany human beings forever. Either today or tomorrow the capital of that person will disappear. Wealthy and beauty are the qualities that do not accompany us but for some short period of life. So, selecting your life partner for beauty and wealth are not a wise idea. The best quality that we must be careful of is, of course, his or her code of conduct or morality. We should be careful that he or she will be not only our husband or wife but also our children’s father or mother. If they are wealthy or beautiful or handsome, still we can compromise as these qualities don’t put us in troubles. However, if they are not moral people, then what will happen to our life after the marriage? According to Bukhtari and Muslim Hadith, a woman may be married for four reasons: for her property, for her rank, for her beauty, and for her religion (and character). So marry the one who is best in the religion and character and prosper. To conclude, people consider beauty, wealth, good status and ethics while seeking their life partner. And what I also believe is that morality/character must be the first and top priority while choosing our spouse because it is ethics that can ensure a sound, simple, prosperous and peaceful life.


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    • Mansoor Mukhtari profile imageAUTHOR

      Sayed Mansoor Shah 

      5 years ago from Kabul, Afghanistan

      It is my pleasure, Mr. Gregor.

    • profile image

      Anne Gregor 

      5 years ago

      Thank you for a very profound article. If I may add, another consideration in selecting a lifetime partner is making sure that you both have the same belief and spirituality. It will help the couple understand each other, which is a very important factor in human relationship.

      Anne Gregor

    • Mansoor Mukhtari profile imageAUTHOR

      Sayed Mansoor Shah 

      6 years ago from Kabul, Afghanistan

      I do agree with the points you mentioned. Yes, you are right. Good words and good ideas on the same topic. That is interesting. You added up more to my article. So, thanks for your realistic comment.

    • dashingscorpio profile image


      6 years ago from Chicago

      Life is a personal journey.

      Each of us chooses our own friends, lovers, and spouse. An ideal mate for one person may not be an ideal mate for another person. This is why it is so important to take some time to do some serious "introspective thinking" to figure out who you are, what you want/need in a mate for life. This takes time!

      A very common mistake people make is getting married too young or before they figured out their wants and needs as well as developed "realistic expectations". Most of us (fail our way to success) when it comes to relationships. We date, fall in love, breakup, (learn) something about ourselves, date, fall in love, breakup, (learn something new), and so on until we come up with our own life philosophy regarding what is good for (us) with regard to relationships. What was "good" for one person may not be "suitable" for you. Only (you) can determine what makes (you) happy!

      Know yourself, love yourself, and trust yourself!

      The goal is to find someone who shares your same values, wants the same things for the relationship as you do, (naturally agrees) with you on how to obtain those things, and last but not least have a (mutual) depth of love and desire for one another.

      There are only two ways to experience joy and peace of mind in relationships: we either get what we want or we learn to be happy with what we have.

      "Never love anyone who treats you like you're ordinary."

      - Oscar Wilde


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