Why Am I Hiding My Christianity

It's nothing new to be a Christian who struggles to share their faith with others, but I want to question why I am afraid to and what can be done to change that.

I moved to Los Angeles with my wife 2 years ago. We had been dating since high school and were married within weeks of graduating college. A month later we were on a plane and moving to California, leaving friends, family and all of our ties behind. I had established a tight-knit group of Christian friends that I could confide in and who helped me in my walk. But once we moved out to California it was a totally different story, we both found ourselves with no Christian friends and no tie to fellowship or a church community.

At first we tried, we went to various churches, even joined a small group and a bible study, but for one reason or another we stopped going. I was working every sunday morning and my wife was working most week nights, it was difficult to make it week after week. With no one walking beside us, we quickly fell away, and now, rarely are we going to church or spending time in the bible.

I work in the entertainment business, the music business, where religion is discouraged and Christianity is scorned. And I have felt it since walking in the door. Even in college I was never an "in your face" Christian, I went to weekly fellowship groups and led a bible study or two, but the secular population of the university did its thing and I did mine. I didn't feel like going to church was discouraged. But now, on a weekly basis, I hear people all around me with hatred and distrust for Christians. And that is a scary and challenging place to be, but part of me agrees with them...

The modern Christian has become a symbol of hypocrisy. Every where we look, there is another news story about a preist or a Christian celebrity doing something 'un-godly'. But this is not the example we should be showing the unbelieving world... which is why I, and many like me, have chosen not to share our beliefs or associate ourselves with "Christianity".

It is sad that the church has made the biggest issues our of abortion and gay marriage, to the point where the Christian body is spurned to hatred and bigotry. I am not saying that I condone abortion or homosexual acts, but I also don't believe in condemning those who do. The Bible teaches us to love everyone unconditionally. Why are the LGBT and women's rights activists excluded from that?

As a young believer, I have had many gay friends and known people who have gotten abortions. I don't think it is right to close ourselves off to them, they need God's grace as much as I do... But since "Christianity" has chosen to fight instead of love. I find it hard to identify myself as a "Christian".

As I work through these thoughts, I realize that its not being a believer I am ashamed of, and I am ashamed, it's being called a "Christian". I have become a 'Closet Christian' no one around me knows that I believe that Jesus died for my sins, but if someone asked I would tell them just that.

Right now, I cannot call myself a "Christian" without being embarrassed by the actions of other "Christians" and so I will stay what I am "A Believer".