An Initiation into Energetic Matters and the Unseen
A very personal recount of how I came to discover 'energy'. It was perhaps my path and destiny: life did not let me 'rest' until I fully accepted the unseen
Everyone has a purpose in life…a unique gift or special talent to give others. And when we blend this unique talent with service to others, we experience the ecstasy and exultation of our own spirit, which is the ultimate goal of all goals.
When you work you are a flute through whose heart the whispering of the hours turns to music.
…and what is it to weave the cloth with threads drawn from your heart, even as if your beloved were to wear that cloth…
-Kahil Gibran, the Prophet
Like most of us, I grew up in an environment that was typically devoid of any reference/awareness of the workings and existence of ‘energy’. I went through a phase where I stammered as a child, and I was affected by mild dyslexia (I used to read and write numbers and letters the other way around); I was also able to ‘sense’ people, although I didn’t know not everyone can do that. This saved my life at least on one occasion, and prevented harm many other times. I cannot be classed as a psychic I guess, but I had a few life-changing spiritual experiences that did determine, I believe, the course of my life. I can isolate two that were probably the most important.
The first occurred when I was about ten years old. We lived in a town that had a serious problem with drug addiction. There was a particular square which was the designated spot for these poor souls: every day I passed by that spot, to and from school. You can imagine the worry of parents of young children, given this situation: there was a lot of talking about the problem in families and in schools. One day, walking back home, I noticed a purple sachet sticking from the beak of one of the marble eagles in the square. I knew it was the standard ‘packaging’ for drugs, and a sense of curiosity held me: should I take it? Should I see what was in there? At that precise moment, an image came into my mind: I could see myself in a deep dark pit, trying to claw my way out, and then these words came into my mind: ‘If you fall into that pit, you never come back’. I run home, suddenly aware of what was in front of me, and aware of what that simple message had communicated to me. I know that what happened that afternoon was guidance given to me. There is a profound truth in the fact that if one abuses the primary tool (the body) creating a strong chemical imbalance, it’s very difficult to ever re-establish normal energy pathways, as the memory of the ‘trauma’ is forever in the body. Whatever addiction one develops, one will always have to live with that experience: it’s indeed possible to overcome addiction, but the ‘energetic memory’ will always be there.
My first ‘initiation’ into energy matters happened when I was about fourteen. Let me tell you that by that age, already, the young child I had been had largely been forgotten, under layers of conditioning, fear, and manipulation; it’s the story of many of us. We lived then in the countryside, and it was the day my much-awaited-for horse arrived: I had been waiting for years for this! And it was an incredibly disappointing moment: the animal I had been given really didn’t reflect the youthful, beautiful palomino of my imagination. While he was grazing peacefully, probably happy the journey was over, I inspected the poor thing once more: he was really in a sorry state. His ribs showed, under a coat that had patches of dirt: his mane was knotted, his hooves were far too long and had a strange shape. He looked tired and sad: I felt like crying. Then I stroked the animal…and as I did so images from his life flooded into my head, and I heard not words, but a consciousness that I was the decider, in that very moment, of this being’s fate. I could offer him a home, and a happy life, or I could send him back where he had come from, where he would probably suffer some more. It was a defining moment because I felt ‘someone’ had asked me to make a responsible choice, for the first time in my life. He stayed. I called him Houston.
So from then on, the long road to recovery started: this horse was also full of fear. Strangely, all his fear and damage he had received mirrored exactly what had happened to my spirit! The biggest gift Houston gave me was the gift of awareness. He was so scared and tense that every time one moved, he tended to tense up and jump aside: that made him rather dangerous as he could accidently hurt someone in doing so. I decided this horse had to learn to trust again, so I started placing my hands on his neck; and I would leave them just there, to get him used to being touched and cleaned etc. This worked quite well. He calmed down nicely over time; then, I started noticing that my hands became very warm while placing them on his body. The more I applied this process, the more I became aware of something flowing through my hands, and through me: my heart’s intention was to make Houston feel peaceful and secure, and while sending that intention, ‘energy’ seemed to flow through my being. I would also feel peaceful and secure, too. Once awareness touches you, there is no going back: you felt it, you know it’s true: use it or not, it stays with you. I learnt about energy from a horse!
So this is my background. Many more things have happened that have opened my mind and being to the realm of energy and the unseen: I speak to you from knowledge that has come to me intuitively, knowledge that was already there and from knowledge I have acquired through my professional training. Training and schooling are invaluable: they help the therapist with putting their abilities into perspective and a structured safe routine. It’s also important to learn how to communicate with people, because it’s no use to hold knowledge if such knowledge is then conveyed in a damaging or unclear way.
Many years after what happened in the square and after Houston, after many moons and many learning opportunities, things have gone full circle and I am finally in position to begin to understand and use that energy. I hope my journey will be perhaps of some use to others, because remember, it is your journey: ‘energy’ will take the shape needed in your specific case.