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Decisions: Chances, changes, choices

Updated on May 2, 2012
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Let the chaos ensue...

Making and accepting changes, sometimes requires taking chances. Sometimes there are no choices, when it comes to changes. Giving changes a chance and giving yourself or someone else a chance to change...some choices seem harder to make, than accepting the changes. I will never regret, taking chances, or the changes that came with the chance to change any choice. They say to change one thing is to change everything...I wouldn't be where I am or who I am, were it not for chances, changes, and choices.

That is not to say I have not wondered if some of the choices I have made were more about taking a chance than they were about accepting the changes. I may never know why I have made some of the choices I have made or what made me make them, only that in life, change is sometimes necessary, however painful or disturbing it may seem at the time the changes, choices and chances are taking place. Nevertheless, I have enough faith to know that in everything there is purpose and a reason, even if I cannot or am unable to see the wisdom, sense, or purpose in it at the time I am undergoing the changes brought on by the choices and chances I have made or do make.

Hindsight would have anyone question, doubt, or wonder, about certain chances and or choices they may take, or have taken, especially if the result of those chances and choices we make and or made, cause pain or heartache, for ourselves and or for others. However, giving the changes a chance, accepting, and making peace with those changes, is a lot easier said than done. Perhaps that is the reason so many of us are reluctant to change-perhaps because we fear taking a chance and or being in the position of making choices could and may very well, bring about irrevocable changes, changes that may make many of us second guess why we made the choices or took the chances we did, to begin with.

We don’t always know the outcome of the choices we make until much later, nor do we always foresee the outcome of the changes that take place as a result of the choices that brought about the changes in the first place. We don’t always know that the chances we’ve taken in making those choices are or will be worth it, or if they would have somehow been different, had we made another choice, or had not given it/them a chance. The point is, that some changes come regardless of what choices or chances we take or do not take, make, or do not make. No one knows why things happen the way they do, the future is unforeseeable, thus we cannot know with certainty if the chances and or choices we take or make would somehow have been different had we made or not made them. For all we know, the changes would have taken place regardless of the chances or choices made, thereby making change inevitable. As to whether the changes turn out to be favorable, forgettable, regrettable, and or memorable, is the only real question.

In large part, taking a chance, giving a chance, trusting, entrusting, come with risks, as with choices we make or have made, leaving us questioning our wisdom in making those choices and taking those chances. We quite often question the choices and chances we took/take, especially if the result of choices, chances, and changes seem insurmountable or too painful to overcome and or endure. We sometimes find ourselves saying ‘if only’, or ‘what if’, doubting, wondering, and second guessing, as to whether or not we made or have made the ‘right’ choice, or if we should have given or taken the chance. Chiefly, due to the changes that occur as a consequence of the chances and choices we make or made.

Myself, I have made many questionable choices in my life, taken chances, and given chances, that resulted in changes I was or felt ill prepared for, or felt as though I could not would not be strong enough to endure, overcome, face, or accept. Nevertheless, I no longer have a choice in the matter, change comes, it always does, everything changes, good or bad, nothing can stop change, thus we can only learn to accept change, or make the best out of the changes that come, occur, or take place. At this point, I find I must trust, and have faith, that all things, all changes, all experiences, good and bad, are necessary, for growth, and even when I cannot see the sense or wisdom in this process, at the time, or right away, I know there is a purpose for it.

None of us would be where we are, or who we are, if not for choices, chances, and or changes, even if we are not anywhere near, where we thought we would be or who we envisioned we would be, yet. I say yet, because there are still chances, choices, and changes, to be made, that will be made, that will occur or take place, that can and or will or may, lead us to where we are meant to be and whom we are meant to become.

The past builds character and the pains and hurts we manage to overcome, survive, and endure should serve as an inspiration, not as painful reminders-otherwise, we just become martyrs. I don’t want anyone to feel sorry for me and I don’t want to wallow in self-pity, I don’t want the pains or decisions, choices or chances I take, will take, have taken, to be in vain. Thus, I do not and will not regret any choices I have made or any chances I have taken or given, they have all led to changes…changes from within, changes that have helped me grow, taught me to forgive, forget, trust, show compassion, empathy, and most importantly, helped strengthen my faith and increase my capacity to love.

Given the opportunity to change the choices we have made or the chances we have given or taken, even one, would be to change everything, and regardless of how difficult life and its lessons may be, are, were, or can be; I personally, would not change a thing. I refuse to spend my life looking back, wondering, doubting, regretting, questioning, what if, or if only…my time is better spent focusing on the present, the here and now, because no matter what, I cannot change the past and I cannot foresee what has not happened yet. Therefore, if I focus more on the chances and choices I make now, and use what I have learned and gained from them in a positive way, who knows what changes, will be brought about as a result…

They say if the Lord brings you to it He will bring you through it, and while I may not be religious, I do consider myself to be ‘spiritual’, so I must trust and have faith that whatever happens is not and will not be in vain. I just pray for the wisdom and the strength to endure, and overcome whatever chances, choices, or changes, that come my way.

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