Empathic By Nature
Empathy is about finding echoes of another person in yourself.— Mohsin Hamid
What is an Empath?
We often hear the word empathy, but not often do we hear about being empathic. If someone is empathic they tend to absorb the energies and emotions of those in their environment. Their mood, body language, facial expressions and emotional displays may be altered by those in their surroundings. The intuition of these individuals allows for them to feel the emotions and energies of other people, animals and objects despite their proximity. In fact, if an empath is in tune with their senses they may be able to read the emotions and energies of someone else by attempting to feel that person. Being empathic is often associated with a person who goes to great lengths to care for another - they have a tendency of ignoring their own needs, seeing those of others as superior in importance.
Being an empath implies that one has an empathic ability which falls into the category of psychic abilities. Empathic individuals have, as many psychics do, a heightened form of intuition which allows them to experience and feel things outside of the realm of things deemed possible with normal intuition.
Empaths have what is known as clairsentience or "clear feeling." This is a psychic ability which allows one to receive intuitive messages by means of feelings and both physical and emotional sensations. Where many would consider being empathic having a gift, many empaths feel it is more of a curse. Having any sort of ability different from those around you can be a challenge, worse yet, empaths absorb energies and emotions from their environment. If the empath is not aware of how to control their ability and how to protect themselves from the negativity and pain in the world around them, they can begin to feel quite drained and defeated. There are some ways in which the empath can protect themselves from the negativities that burden the psychic ability.
Walls are a form of protection that the mind creates as a shield against things it deems harmful. The more comfortable one becomes with their surroundings and with a people and objects, the more walls they subconsciously let down. For example, in strong friendships where the parties tell each other everything, those people are likely to have a fewer number of walls when in each other's company. The walls they may have had while the friendship was developing were let down as a result of trust, love, and respect.
As important as it is to let your walls down at the right time, it is also extremely important that an empath know when to build walls back up in order to protect themselves. In crowded places, in places where a lot of loss has been experienced, and in situations of high emotional demand building walls can be a saving grace for an empath. So how are these walls built?
Walls can be built by imagining, for example, actually building stone walls around your mind, and willing them to protect you and not let harm pass through. Another technique is by imagining a white light is shining off the surface of your brain and that anything that comes in contact with it is cleansed. Additionally, for those who prefer not to imagine what they are doing, recognizing that the situation or environment may be harmful to them based on their ability can also help protect them. This method may be helpful as they then become conscious of what could happen and can try their best not to let it.
A second method a lot of empaths take to for protection is the use of tumbled stones and crystals - each of which has its own unique set of properties that aid an empath in utilizing, harnessing and protecting their ability. For example, there are stones such as onyx, black tourmaline, and hematite which are used mainly as forms of protection from negative energies. Additionally using stones such as rose quartz helps to build a shield of loving energy around the empath which can also aid in dissolving negativity.
When choosing a crystal or stone to use one must make sure it feels right to them - hold the stone, focus on feeling the energy of it - does it speak to you? If the answer is yes, the stone is right, if not, keep looking. It is very important that the stone being used is the proper one otherwise it may not perform as hoped.
Note: not all stones and crystals act the same for everyone so despite what their intended uses and performance expectations are, they may do something different for each holder.
Breaking Energy Connections
Energy connections are an important part of being human as well as being empathic. Humans are social creatures, and being empathic only increases the need to be surrounded by other energies as well. Sometimes the strongest of energy connections can be the ones most detrimental to the well-being of the empath. Destructive Bonds, Energy Vampires and emotionally abusive people all need to be avoided.
A destructive bond is characterized by a bond into which the empath is funneling a lot of energy, and receiving nothing in return except poor mental and or physical health. These bonds often occur in one-sided friend and relationships.
Empaths tend to draw in energy vampires. These are people who seemingly suck the energy right out of the empath. They are in constant need of a level of support that cannot realistically be provided by the empath who must also maintain their own health. There needs to be a point where the empath points out that as much as they want to help the person, they cannot be their only support system. This is often the cause of failing relationships, and heartache in families and friends who feel as if they failed to help someone because it was too much. It is okay to need help to help someone and it is an unfair expectation they have if they expect for you to be the only one helping them. As much as it may not be their intention, they are an energy vampire.
Emotionally abusive people are people who manipulate the emotions of themselves and of others in order to get what they want. Everyone has likely known someone like this - someone who makes you feel guilty for breaking up with them, or guilty for taking time for yourself and cancelling a plan etc. These individuals can also be energy vampires and when in constant interaction with them a destructive bond usually forms- empaths are likely to cave into their requests and do as they ask.
Crystals Every Empath Should Own
Rose quartz is a stone every empath should have in their collection as it is a stone which emits a loving energy; this stone is used by empaths as a grounding stone as well as to push away negative energies which they absorb.
This stone is used for removing emotional blockages which an empath may develop in times or situations of high stress and emotional demand. It is also known for its ability to absorb the negative energies that become trapped inside an empath.
Lepidolite is known to increase the power of other stones in the collection it is placed in. empaths can use it for the purpose of recharging and strengthening their other stones. Additionally, it acts as an anti-anxiety stone and is known for its properties of power, peace, love, and luck.
Amethyst is a stone which can be used to sharpen or heighten one's intuitive abilities. It helps the empath to trust in their intuition and to determine the sources of their emotions and feelings, allowing them to differentiate between those that are their's and those they are being influenced by. (See image below)
Black tourmaline is known as one of the ultimate stones of protection, freeing its holder from all forms of negative energy. It is a very powerful protection stone commonly used by empathic healers to protect them from the negativity they work with.
Who's Emotions Are These?
As an empath, it can be hard to determine which of the emotions and feelings we have are our own, and which are ones we experience as a result of a connection to someone else. Empaths often form what are known as cords, or energy connections, with people whom they are around a lot or love. For example, an empath may be connected to their friends, family, coworkers, lover etc.
Having multiple connections can make it hard for the empath to determine the root of their emotions or feelings. They may feel an overwhelming amount of sadness in a situation they feel doesn't warrant it, only to later find out that one of their connections had lost someone. Experiences like these are not uncommon for the empathic population.
The main question then becomes, how does an empath tell where the emotion is coming from? Additionally, some may wonder if there is a way to stop themselves from feeling as another does. Figuring out where/who an emotion, mood or feeling is sprouting from can be done using a few different methods:
Looking for a cause in the surrounding environment can help to pinpoint why you are feeling as you are. Say, for example, you are on an airplane and you have flown a lot in your life and have never been anxious about it. Suddenly the plane experiences turbulence and you find yourself experiencing a lot of anxiety. Perhaps it is not your own, and recognizing that may just be its cure.
By tuning into their own intuition an empath is able to focus their attention and energy on reading that of another. They can do this with or without the use of crystals or other materials for assistance. Doing so requires them to be extremely aware of their mind and to try to empathize with another person by taking on their feelings, mood or emotions. This method can be used to tell where a certain energy or emotional experience is derived from by reading until the correct one is found. This method can be draining on an empath as it requires a lot of energy focus. Self-care practices such as meditation and grounding may be necessary afterward to rejuvenate this energy.
The Check-In Method
Seemingly one of the easier methods, the check-in method can help an empath to discover the source of the foreign feelings they are experiencing. The check-in method is fairly straightforward as it only requires check-ins with the self, others and the environment. It incorporates the observation method - the empath should first complete a scan of their environment. Failing to spot the cause by doing so, they then need to check-in with themselves to be sure the emotions and feelings are not their own. Ruling out this possibility they can begin to check-in with those they have energy connections with to see if any of them are experiencing the same emotions. Lastly, the empath can also choose to block the feelings should they recognize they are not their own. This can be done by using particular crystals, or by building walls (both of which are discussed above).
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