ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Eric’s Sunday Sermon; Quarantine Time, School Closure

Updated on March 16, 2020

Who Wears The Shoes

Never figure to hard.
Never figure to hard. | Source

I Don't Know Music Much

Dad Forgot to Teach Me

Just a bit of crazy here for a reason. You folks out there are crazy so I will return the favor.

If this is quarantine, sign me up again. We have School Closure here. What does that mean like what is quarantine? School closures mean no school, count me in on that one. We are not sick. So why are we quarantined? Nobody at school had the flu so why school closure. Quarantine our fun. Maybe some school closure for a kick in the pants to learn together at home. Quarantine this you morons. But a month out of school? We are writing down fun to do lists. Beach walk was awesome. We need two more Goldfish.

Oh well, I am in a real bad category. What immune system? Just get over sixty and grab some cancer and freak out? But then who will play basketball? Oh well I reckon I will have to put off sick for a bit. And I can only sink a 3 pointer about 1 out of 4.

Do not listen to that punk kid. I won the nerf battle. Ok I have a few welts and my safety glasses are kind of broken but who is counting. Well count this; 44 over 2 times 88 over 10 and you get a clue about Spring Vacation that lasts over a month. I hope this sermon is close to Sunday, March 15, 2020 because without school or job – what the heck day is this anyway. I think it is the day we eat ice cream? Or at least that is the day my son says it is? Roller coaster and I cannot get rid of my E tickets.

Alright do you really remember how to play tiddly winks (sp) or marbles (no sp)? I had no clue so instead of looking them up. We made them up. Who needs rules from a book when you can argue about them using logic?

Enough of wearing you out, but you should try my shoes for an hour.

Don't Know This Guy

Let Freedom Ring

I pay about twenty buckaroos a month for the gym. For this quarantine I would do that times four. I have gained 3% body fat. My buddy/son is on track. How fun is that. We do not need toilet paper but extra weight is good for a lack of food. People do not realize that storing food on your body is better than in the pantry. Yep. I went gone over 8 days straight without food in a cave. Water is needed but if you do not eat who needs to poop? Now about that drinking your urine. That is just weird. Do not do it twice in a row. Toxins build up. One of the cool things about water is that we put a bunch of stuff in our household drinking water. Well we drink filtered water. But I have 40 gallons of chlorinated water in big old bottles. If something got all weird I would not have to drink my urine.

Some folk say I am an ordinary man and some folks think I live so far out there in my mind that they just roll their eyes. My boy does it all the time. But he just understood the concepts of diagnosis, osmosis and prognosis not to mention halitosis. We learn processes to understand our own in our pea brains. And of course we are going to dive into, though we already have, metamorphism and symbiosis. The study of change helps us understand our 6 year old neighbor and our 92 year old revered other neighbor.

Quarantine is that cocoon. We get to come out of it changed. We get to metamorphose into something better. What a strange thing going on. Quarantine is a time of growth and increasing knowledge which is so cool. Quarantine me baby!!

Alrighty then I done put the dance and singing and music on the table. Dancing a four step, Tango and understand a cliff note from a treble is trouble for an old man. (yes cliff note is a joke I have trouble with the clef on my clarinet)

I wonder what the PTA is demanding and judging of me. Seems like I probably am not doing the “CORE” curriculum deally bobber. Oh my Patsy Cline and Beethoven, Elvis and Mae West make that world go away. My feet are sore from the boy stepping on my toes to the country swing. Thank goodness we have math to do so I can rest.

When I lived in a distant place and knew it could not last, we sang a good old song. Sur le bon tems or something. For the good times. In twenty years we will cherish this “quarantine”. These are good times if we so choose. Whahoo!

Next time you are in a bar drowning your sorrows, I am the guy drinking sarsaparilla and kicking butt at pool and sending a smile your way. My nose has broken enough hands. This deal is cotton soft to me.

Meanest Bull Ever Rode

I got nothin.
I got nothin. | Source

I Swear He Is Not My Son

People Get Up!!

My momma late on told me that I was such a sweet little baby boy. And she paused and said that I had grown into a sweet old baby boy. Seems she was saying I had not grown up, just grown older. Fair on you mom, figures you were right. Some of us don’t do so goodest with others. Quarantines might be a good idea for us. Welcome to my world of books and dance.

Now just assume that this old cowboy has been kilt. Just assume he has felt death and he smiles. I have never seen a pain that was not worth my time to hold hands with. Let others walk away and good on them. I just am one weak fellow in such regards. On the way to here I just have not seen a person with a hand out was not offering a hand up. Truth be that they will not remember me, but I will remember my son passing a dollar out the window.

Now truth need be told. I don’t feel all that right on. I am feeling more like a dog bit me than the heavens opened up. Now you all might say “yuk” and “what a bummer” but this ship don’t sail that aways. We have a term in flying, it is called the attitude. We all get longitude and altitude but who gets attitude? Attitude is the angular differential assumed between an airplane’s axis and the line of the horizon. It is visual and not instrumental. Or we might just say, “Is your plane flying level by what you can see?” I cannot see your horizon, I can only visualize it. I only can see my boot step booggy woggie and if I stare at yours I lose my attitude. So I like to say I am not feeling all right. Because that puts me in line with your way of thinking. But not my attitude. You see my alright is different than yours. If’n you all stepped into my shoes without looking you would puke. But you got to see that to me puking means I am alive. Whahoo!!!

Now all that is the long lizard’s tail of saying, be happy. I am not stuffing out a cigarette, popping 5 pills and washing it down with whiskey at 2 in the morning. Now that is a fine day. Laugh but I have been there. Eye of the Tiger. Keep it, stay it and love it.

Love is brutal. There is no walking away. You do not get to do a drive by with love. You have to own it and declare it and live it. Let the folks freak. You and me get to love. Sorry I have got to go, my feets are doing the two step like a monkey’s uncle. I gots to dance.

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment
    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      10 days ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Fair enough Ms. Dora, fair enough.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      10 days ago from The Caribbean

      "In twenty years we will cherish this 'quarantine.'" With so much to do online, the school-age children cherish it now. It seems that at any age, we can count our blessings.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      13 days ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Clive that seems fair enough.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      13 days ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Manatita I surely do feel loved. And as you mention rather anchored.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      13 days ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Mitara

      I was just thinking about how much I touch people. That is simply part of my life. So I am trying to slow down and look folks in the eye and really listen. It is different.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      13 days ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Ruby I think that you are doing it right. We have gone out a few times but it is stressful. I know that makes no sense but it just is.

    • clivewilliams profile image

      Clive Williams 

      13 days ago from Jamaica

      The Earth needs a time of peace. She is tired.

    • MitaraN profile image

      Mitara N 

      13 days ago from South Africa

      Interesting article.

      I guess the concept of quarantine and closures or shutdowns are more a safe guard. The moral of the story, yes, life still carries on but always be safe in any social activity.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      I feel all dirty. I am having so much fun. Golf and Hiking and fishing. Drop me down easy babyl

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 

      2 weeks ago from london

      Hold fast! A sturdy anchor, even in a rough storm, is difficult to move. We love you much ... more ... this friends and family of yours; as for the Divine Mother, She loves you most. Glory be!!

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Manatita my boy just laughed hard at me. I was washing off. Nope, no water. I was a washin with the precious blood of the lamb. Look over yonder. Fo you find no sanity here. A whole bunch of love coming from you will do just fine and I thank you.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Pamela, I dropped one knee and kissed the dirt. My boy shook his head. But that is my world. I raise my hands and bow my head.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Verlie our angel; my elder wrote to ask me how we were doing. I just thought of you and said fantastic! Let us get this done. Together.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Devika we are doing a hop hop here. It I don't get happy much, meaning I do not understand it much. But I can do it.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Linda we went to the driving range. That Gabe can crush it but the hike and getting two new "Dart" and "Flinch" fish went my way. Linda I think our lives stink real pretty, as I used to tell me mom.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      2 weeks ago from Southern Illinois

      We are not quarantined, but we are to stay at home, no crowds. So we dance with the radio and play cards. It seems like a good time to write but my muse is mad and in hiding. Be good and stay healthy.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Bill my elder boy and I were just cracking up over a Kanbucha brew. 6 years ago they gave me 4 to live. I reckon docs can't count all that well. I need another 20 of you and my buddies here.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      John my man. Writing is taking a hit around here. I think we should schedule some time not to write. I spoke to my most wonderful ex-wife last night. She and my beautiful bride of twenty seem to worry to much. I mean like they have frowns.

      Yes sir my job is clear. Have fun! Party time!!

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 weeks ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Just a note. Mom is home cooking a quinoa soup. I love it. It makes the boy gag. So when she was busy we dumped his in my bowl. We could not stop giggling. That my friend is a quarantine.

    • swalia profile image

      Shaloo Walia 

      2 weeks ago from India

      There's a total shutdown in my city. Schools, colleges, malls, gyms, theatres, spas have been shut down. Wish they had closed offices too!!

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 

      2 weeks ago from london

      A brilliant piece, Bro. Let me drink sarsaparilla with you. I won't kick butt though. But we can go fishing, play games with the kid, take the family to the beach and just hang loose, he he. No school? No problems!

      America is blessed with nice trails and the geezer looks a little like Bill.

      Seems like you have this water thing under wraps. Nice!

    • Pamela99 profile image

      Pamela Oglesby 

      2 weeks ago from Sunny Florida

      The quarantine is the best thing for me as I am immuno-suppressed and have lund disease. I guess I have to hide out until it is over and it sounds like you should also. This will pass as all things do, Etic. I wish you good health and some happy family times.

    • snakeslane profile image

      Verlie Burroughs 

      2 weeks ago from Canada

      Holy Eric! I'm getting dizzy just reading this. Two-stepping to the quarantine boogey (sp). That's the way to do it, glad to hear you got water.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 

      2 weeks ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Hi Eric a crazy world we live in so much has changed over the last few months but I still haven't forgotten how to smile.

    • Carb Diva profile image

      Linda Lum 

      2 weeks ago from Washington State, USA

      Eric, the shelves are bare and I hope to goodness that the food that was hoarded is eaten and doesn't go to waste. Church service via computer and that's OK until we all start to sing a hymn and then the kitty goes nuts.

      The quarantine is rough on some people, but I tend to work alone anyhow. The garden will love the attention.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      2 weeks ago from Olympia, WA

      I'm an introverted recluse by nature who writes. The virus is going to have to work hard to get me.

      Stay healthy and happy my friend.

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 

      2 weeks ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks for the sermon in these crazy times, Eric. I have fallen a bit behind with my writing because there seem to be more urgent matters to attend to here due to the Coronavirus and at least being prepared. My grandkids are being kept home from school and people are panic buying. We just have to try to find positives in the situation.

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://maven.io/company/pages/privacy

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)
    ClickscoThis is a data management platform studying reader behavior (Privacy Policy)