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Eric’s Sunday Sermon; “That Which Tears Us Apart and the Language of Love”

Updated on November 24, 2019
Ericdierker profile image

Holding degrees in philosophy and Law. Formal studies or certificates or degrees in business, theology, insurance and security. Ex-preacher.

Backyards

Oops I think this is the wrong photo.
Oops I think this is the wrong photo. | Source

Don't Tear Me Down

What Do We Speak?

Isn’t that a great term. Tears us apart? What does that even mean to tear us apart? Does it mean to tear apart the bad? Does it mean to tear you and I apart? Tear and apart are interesting concepts. I am quite sorry but once in love with you I cannot tear apart that deal. I have tried to tear apart my relationships, sorry again it did not work.

Check out that spelling. It is the same as tears like crying. I worked on that for some minutes and just gave up. Nope that is tare, tear, and tore, and tarry. Alright be a pompous snob and know the spelling. Good for you and you miss the fun and imagination and creation. Good for you. Go elsewhere quick. My 9 year old got the fun. But you can just get back to your self-righteous stance and see if you can comprehend four languages. I will see you in the rearview mirror in a taxi in Tijuana after I pick up my son from Vietnamese class. Only two words a week in Latin but he also wants to know scientific names.

Don’t even go there if you cannot explain that animals usually fall into one of five different phylum which are Cnidarian, Arthropod, and Echinoderms and Mollusks and Chordata. (personally I like Arachnids here but it does not follow the deal)

So when you talk about the right spelling or your divisive nature on words. Jump on board our ship and try to sail it. Now these dang plants have me scratching my head. In the desert here it is hard to decipher decidua for coniferous. // sorry for spelling// I do not think we are word stupid around here. Just go with hord, herd, hear and hard. Why a “flock” of crows is called a “murder”, and is my wife crazy as a Loon?

So the point of this first part is that we judge a person by the words they use but when you do you have to know them will bring us to this next part. About judging by accent. Do not judge a folk from New York by your Cajun in down in Bayou country or Washington State or Washington D.C. My wife’s “English is Australian”. My son’s is perfect American English. I mix and match adjectives with adverbs and nouns and predicates. I have that right as I have degrees which are centered on the use of words.

Too Comfy

Just back country sleeping.
Just back country sleeping. | Source

Being a Word Smith is What I Do, I Am Having a Blast

So we have this wonderful area where we love another’s words. So fun! We just kicky back and grab a bag of popcorn and enjoy the show and we pick up the nuance. I come from an area where no accent is normal. It is straight forward American English. But now I live in an area of Spanglish. What a blast. I have to teach it to my son. Here we are often judges by our knowledge of border Spanish and English. I should say Mexican, because the lisp in Castilian is a little haughty taughty if you know what I mean. We also learn words like “boot” and “lorry”, which says something about another culture. We only know some deep Asian by Buddha and Hebrew from the Bible. But we try. Guess my name and know we have some Germanic. The boy Knew Dannk Shoin (sp) without even batting an eye. But he is half Vietnamese and half Arizonian.

So again we get back to the point. Learning other languages allows us to express ourselves to others. Even if it is just a little it gives the respect. Respect is the cornerstone of love. The decision to learn another’s tongue is something you do not “need” to do. But if you live where I live it is the only right thing to do. I would say that there are 5 out of 25 children in my son’s class at school that are pure white Americans. (Sorry but here it is important to point out) I mean that as a realization about our culture. I imagine in Kansas it is different. But I do not know. We walked to the cars with a born Ethiopian yesterday. And Rico our friend is Filipino and Israel is something I cannot figure. The language is the same. It is buddies having fun playing soccer with buddies. It is time building Lego deals and hanging out.

Now my boy is at that age with “dirty” jokes. Our language with each other allows him to tell them to me. I know that is crazy. But we do “speak” and love it. Now just take it easy we are getting to the language love and it will be super duper or as I like to quote; supercalifragilisticexpialidocious even though the sound of it is something quite atrocious. (The boy can spell it) Let us move on to the love “in” language. // By and by he spelled that as I was kicking his butt in Volleyball what a weirdo//

The Language of Love

A Wave

One of my hero children who lift me up.
One of my hero children who lift me up. | Source

How High Can The Wind of Language Take Us?

Did you know that I can speak without speaking. Strangest thing. You should see my consternation look. My happy look will make even the least of these to smile. Quizzical is my favorite. I like; “your putting me to sleep”. Oh my angry scowl will make you wince. When I shake my head it clearly means not to do it, but the boy still climbs up on the roof and says I did not tell him not to do it.

So what the heck is the language of love? I can only offer suggestions or things for you to look at. I have sat in parks, I have hung out in hospitals, I have been to dumps and I have visited several continents and studied and work it out and do not know it. If you want to pump out the love, you just do it in your own way and language. And that is so cool. It is up to me to accept it in my own way. I do this deal with my family and I write these sermons and I like to hang out with homeless and I get hired to help folks legally. But I still do not get how I give love.

Totally beyond us. We either do or we do not. The language of love is as different as all the languages in the world. I cannot speak all of them. You have your own language of love. But there is a strange part to it. You speak your language and I get it. I speak mine and you get it.

So what is the language of the law of love? I like to say that love is like snowflakes, no two are the same. Probably just the ramblings of an old man. But I have never seen even two people love the same way. Their language is different. My wife simply cannot love me as I love her but we speak to each other in the language of love. Can this be? I have searched and interviewed many. Every damned love is different as is every language of love. By golly there is no same recipe. No snowflake is the same.

My son put too much spice on his wonderful pasta salad last night. He learned not to over spice. Probably true of love and we learn. Not my call to make. But sit a bit and make that call for you. I try not to give advice here. My job is to show my failures so that you do not commit them. You may interpret or translate.

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    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Manatita I am thankful we are not there yet. I am quite ugly today as my son shot me too close in a Nerf gun fight and there is some bruising. hihihihi. How fun is that until soccer and volleyball?

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 

      6 months ago from london

      Devika says it very nicely indeed. We are in the process, but not quite there. We are seeking Love and because it is itself a timeless journey, so are we. Isn't that in itself wonderful? Great post!

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Devika sometimes culture actually makes life a little more difficult. But we are enriched by it.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 

      6 months ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      No matter who you are and where you come from, if you are in a relationship or not, if you married with children or unmarried. Love is all you need to feel full of life and to be part of something good in your life. One must love for no reason and to feel accepted in any culture because love has no boundaries.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Nikki I fail at love so often. But I do not fail at not hating. I think that may just be a choice. Don't know.

    • nikkikhan10 profile image

      Nikki Khan 

      6 months ago from London

      Thanks so much, Eric for sharing from your heart. We really need it. Love prevails where no haters are, and there Eric lives.

      Blessings!

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Ruby my son just told me to stop loving everyone. It takes to much time. I get it. It takes more time shopping. That is alright with me, but ye loses.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      6 months ago from Southern Illinois

      I can think of nothing that tears people apart like politics and religion. The language of love is universal. We all are human. We all need love. Have a great week of fun time with Gabe.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Dora, mom is serving the Military tonight. She is a steward of their needs. Gabe and I try to keep the home good for her when she comes home Love in our home is in our deeds. Such is her love and ours.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      6 months ago from The Caribbean

      Eric, you got me thinking that loving despite differences in language is one of the greatest, if not the greatest, challenge to love. Lovers will have to communicate not only with words, but with the feeling out of which the words come. Of course, you have much experience in that. No wonder you have so much to teach.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Mary a walk on the beach with four of my children and three close friends. Ok a soccer ball and a bike. That was after a fantastic brunch. I have to back off so as to let them interact without a dad. Wet sandy and dirty--- another best Monday ever.

    • aesta1 profile image

      Mary Norton 

      6 months ago from Ontario, Canada

      It's when we are able to celebrate the difference that we have truly become and that's what you had been showing to us.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Isn't that great Mary. If my wife and I were more alike ---- well who knows?

      All my direct 14 family members are different. My 10 in-laws on my wife's side are not at all the same, my brothers of different mothers are amazingly distinct as are their children and my 6 Godchildren. Now I am leaving out grandparents and my parents as passed, but I love them even.

      It adds up to different.

    • aesta1 profile image

      Mary Norton 

      6 months ago from Ontario, Canada

      You are so right about the language of love. It is so different for each one. Our culture has also so influence on this. Unlike my husband, I am not comfortable in public display of affection. I try but it's not me. I have other ways to show I care.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Kari just for me I think you "nailed it". But I think "prior" must be the last minute.

    • k@ri profile image

      Kari Poulsen 

      6 months ago from Ohio

      When you said (and I'm paraphrasing) the language of love is different in each of us but we still understand each other I thought of the Tower of Babel. Maybe we all spoke the language of love prior. Just a thought.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Demas it is great to hear from you. I hope you are hunkered down for the cold.

      I really like your sentiment. What happens if they look the same but have different snowflake personalities? hihihihi

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Flourish these days I like the language nice and easy. But my elder brother said "Eric there are no good brothers or bad ones, there are just brothers that we love". Now that guy has loved me for 62+ years. That is a different kind of love.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Pamela I had to do some hard loving today. Literally had to smack around a friend of 40 years and get him arrested. Dealing with a drunk beligerent manic is tough as nails. But I rest well now knowing he is safe. And I reckon that is one slice of love.

    • Perspycacious profile image

      Demas W Jasper 

      6 months ago from Today's America and The World Beyond

      No two snowflakes, that anyone took the time to check, are alike, Now perhaps with artificial intelligence someone can check them all. Otherwise I will entertain the possibility that somewhere in this winter's snowfalls and snow storms, the identical twin snowflakes will shout "Here we are, come quick and see!" Just funning you, but isn't that what HP is for?

    • FlourishAnyway profile image

      FlourishAnyway 

      6 months ago from USA

      Every love is different. How true.

    • Pamela99 profile image

      Pamela Oglesby 

      6 months ago from Sunny Florida

      I really like everything you said about the language of love that uses words and eyes, and I suppose even touch. This is an article that made me look inward. Thanks for sharing your thoughts with all of us, Eric.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      I just love you Elijah. I did get told the other day that my best is the language of love. If you want I can give you "Love" off the top of my head in 5 languages. Too fun.

    • The0NatureBoy profile image

      Elijah A Alexander Jr 

      6 months ago from Washington DC

      OK, Eric, You got me with that one.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      John it is kind of you to comment. I am having my Sunday alone time so caught you quick.

    • JohnPLyons profile image

      John Lyons 

      6 months ago from UK & USA

      Indeed, we all tend to like a KISS (Keep It Simple Stupid)!

      Kind Regards

      John

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      So Elijah I worked hard on an appellate brief the other day and presented it two fine lawyers. They ripped me to shreds. The problem was it was too technical. So many cases cited and theories of law. They want my creation not a load that even a judge would not comprehend.

      One of the lawyers was my room mate in '77 '78 in college who had been my clerk in around '84 whose father was a Superior court judge and grandfather a district court justice. Helped me on a capital murder case or two.

      My point is keep it simple stupid. Try it. I do not like it but to get my point across to a homeless man I must speak his language not mine.

    • The0NatureBoy profile image

      Elijah A Alexander Jr 

      6 months ago from Washington DC

      Eric, said as well anyone who has learned via the process of social schooling but not through observing with questioning the how's, when's where's and why's. I once read "in all of your getting, get understanding and asking those

      questions will give it to us over time.

      Now I have to fight with you again. You said "still do not get how I give love?" What one has to do to know how to give love is to look across the narrow line dividing it from hate and see how to give hate then stand on the "thin line between love and hate" and see how what leaves you is the comb inaction I call "indifference."

      Enjoyed the reading, old friend, keep them coming.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Dog gone it Bill I am doing a small pond for some boats Gabe built. Out here in the desert it is Winter planting and Rose trimming time. Last night was a cook and dance fest. Then there was a fight on my bed before sleep. And I have to write and stuff. But I still have time to mess up -- It just seems I am too busy.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      6 months ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Bill we are getting into that. My Gabe and I held hands last night for a man on the road. Look into the eyes, hold hands and pray. Give words of grace and maybe the language of smile. We practice and try not to preach.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      6 months ago from Olympia, WA

      I don't have time to commit your failures, Eric. I'm much too busy committing my own. I'm a handful on the best of days, buddy, but I'm learning along the way, and I reckon that's worth something.

    • lifegate profile image

      William Kovacic 

      6 months ago from Pleasant Gap, PA

      Hello, Mr. Word Smith. You mention the language of love. I'm told there are five love languages that we express. We need to know the other's love language to properly communicate with them. 1. Giving words of affirmation; 2. Doing acts of service for the other; 3. Receiving gifts; 4. Spending quality time; 5.Physical touch (not necessarily of a sexual nature). Hope you have a great week.

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