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Eric's Sunday Sermon; Where is the Compliment?

Updated on March 16, 2016

What a wonderful view.

We can compliment nature. And that might be the best place for us to start getting into complimenting.
We can compliment nature. And that might be the best place for us to start getting into complimenting. | Source

When?

When are we allowed to say good things about ourselves? I think that is a good one to stop and contemplate. I can normally find something good in a situation or with people. I have a positive outlook in general. So I can usually compliment something or someone with ease. And I normally do not stick my foot in my mouth by complimenting a lady by saying “that dress makes you look slim”, did that once and regret it to this day ;-). I am sincere in my compliments. And you know what, I like to give people uplifting comments. I have a gift and I use it. It just is too darn easy to criticize. Don’t get me wrong with my close buddies I love to cut their glory down to size. It has to be 1 part accurate and 2 parts sarcastic. And time tested love makes the comments not hurt but get to the point. Banter is great fun.

Let us get back to saying something good. It really isn’t necessary for “over the counter” encounters. But what the heck I like it. OK it is not all altruistic. I feel good when I compliment a store clerk or attendant of something. I like your haircut; you look sharp today; you have a great attitude; thanks for helping me out; I hope other’s see what a great job you are doing. They smile and I get to feel good – a good deal for both. The other day in the grocery store my wife caught a big error against us and spoke up. The clerk made the error with carelessness. Once pointed out she corrected the error. That was cause in my mind for a compliment. “Wow you sure fixed that fast, you are good”. Drove my wife crazy as she wanted to chastise the incompetence in the first place. My boat don’t sail like that.

And now you have been patient. When are we allowed to say good things about ourselves? Well we answer that straightforward with a question. When do we compliment another? And let us hop to the nitty gritty right away. If you are constantly down on others I will bet you a million that you are constantly getting down on yourself. Am I right? What a deal. Really right there in front of us to see.

Sunrise, just above Sedona

What beautiful views the early morning sun provides.
What beautiful views the early morning sun provides. | Source

Just my favorite compliment song

Compliment yourself

We are not one sided one dimensional creatures. Our attitudes shape our existence. Don’t worry I am not getting all metaphysical on you. A cup is just a thing. My favorite coffee cup given to me by my son and declaring that old guys rule is more than a cup. My attitude toward that cup defines its existence to me. Please take a moment to look around you at what things mean to you. Sure the thing can pass but that feeling does not. In certain ways I am just a thing. I think of me as a host for my soul but it is how my soul is seen by others. So it is very important. Do I give a compliment to a stranger and forget to give a compliment to that one person I know best? Do I not owe that to him? Maybe I do not owe it to him. But sometimes I give compliments just because it makes me feel better to lift another up. Good for them and good for me.

“Eric you are looking great today.” Who is that going to hurt? No one. Who is it going to help? Me. Let us just say you are having a bad day. Things just are not fitting into the space where they belong. If you could just go back and start over things could not be worse. Let me let you in on a secret. You can start your day over anytime you like. You just shake all over. Shake your head real fast. Breathe deep ten times saying your favorite thought and the splash water on your face. Then do what you should have done to start your day in the first place. Compliment yourself and put an uplifting smile on your face.

Oh you are too __________ for that? Get rid of that imposter. When are we allowed to say good things about ourselves? Right here, right now I give you permission to treat yourself to a compliment. Just do it. Find you and compliment you. I would if I were there. I would find something to compliment you on. You can do it too.

Somewhere in a desert

What a wonderful way to start a day.
What a wonderful way to start a day. | Source

You are the best thing

Look for the positive

Now let us get back to that negative stuff. If you can look in the mirror and see only the negative about you, how will that effect how you see others? See the problem? If you do not love yourself how can you spread love to others? Self-esteem is getting cliché. I no longer care for the term though it has its uses. But we do not speak of self-esteem here. We speak of something both more superficial and more deeply intense at the same time. Self-esteem visits the notion of how we see ourselves. Good enough as far as that goes. But really the important part because we are social creatures is a double look. How do we view that others view us. Sure that sounds shallow at first blush and it is. But on double take we can see that we really view ourselves as we perceive how others perceive us. We could go all Zen and discuss how this is wrong. But who cares it is.

When my adult children visit the exterior is completely irrelevant. We double and triple check each other for cracks in our sanity. We need to be critical in the reckoning of how each of us is doing. The compliment comes from us taking the time to get together. Of course we complement each other on the surface but the hug is the greatest compliment of all. The adoration and love goes without saying yet it is said. I look to them and they complement me based on being my children, unconditionally. They look at me and know that I approve and am inspired by their accomplishments and goodness. But by golly jingles we still say it out loud. And we lift each other up.

I happen to be of the mind that you are also worthy of praise. It would seem to me that you are in the best position to compliment yourself. You know you. You know the most important parts on the inside. Now do you plan to go out and do evil in the world today? No of course you do not. Put that in the plus column. Do you plan on going out and doing your worst? No of course not. Can you envision yourself doing something really good today? Add another plus to your calculations.

You see I do not even know you but I can see your base positives. And so I say: My you look positively positive today. You will do well. Would you please say something to yourself today that lifts you up and sends you into the right direction?

Just the peace of mind when we say out loud to ourselves something positive is priceless. But let me beseech you. Don’t just do it for you. Do it for everyone you meet on this fine day. If you are positive about yourself you can extend that out and in some it may make all the difference in their life.

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    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Very nice point that is at the crux of the matter.

    • lykamenez profile image

      ana lyka menez 

      2 years ago from //pitching my tent wherever i'm led...

      When people are more intent on seeing the good stuff in people- with people, then sincere compliments will just naturally flow. Hence, there would be no need to come up with empty flatteries.

    • Patty Inglish, MS profile image

      Patty Inglish MS 

      2 years ago from USA. Member of Asgardia, the first space nation, since October 2016

      Yes it is.:)

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Patty I did it and both of us feel great. Life is good.

    • Patty Inglish, MS profile image

      Patty Inglish MS 

      2 years ago from USA. Member of Asgardia, the first space nation, since October 2016

      How cool!

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you Patty, you just lifted my spirits so I am going to go share that with someone right now.

    • Patty Inglish, MS profile image

      Patty Inglish MS 

      2 years ago from USA. Member of Asgardia, the first space nation, since October 2016

      I also like to compliment store clerks and others, but this really resonates: "We double and triple check each other for cracks in our sanity." I see so many people, related to each other or not related at all, looking for faults to criticize and diminish in family and others! More compliments from us might help. Complimenting oneself in the onslaught of untrue criticism is hard, but that is the devil's goal - for us to hide lights under bushels - so let us stomp on him.

      Great sermon!

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 

      2 years ago from Shelton

      Eric another feel good sermon, thank you for the continued share :)

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      We must celebrate the beauty as much as we denigrate the ugly. One to be honored the other most often to be ignored.

    • lawrence01 profile image

      Lawrence Hebb 

      2 years ago from Hamilton, New Zealand

      Eric

      Amen to that. Not easy to do though.

      Lawrence

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you Faith this starts my day off just right. You seem to be constantly uplifting others and it shows in you positive faith driven life. I am honored to know you.

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 

      2 years ago from southern USA

      Hi Eric,

      Thank you for reminding us of the importance of uplifting, not only others, but ourselves! How can we not love ourselves when we know we are made in His image, then go on out in the world and love others.

      I think the world can be a much better place if we show a little kindness to all with whom we come into contact, just like you already do. You are awesome, Eric! Keep up the awesomeness each day.

      Peace and blessings

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you Dora, it makes me very happy that you like it. Brightens my day so thank you double for letting me know.

    • MsDora profile image

      Dora Weithers 

      2 years ago from The Caribbean

      True, Eric. We give what we have. If we have good thoughts about ourselves, we can share good thoughts with others. I really like this article.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Tim that is a glorious thing to say. I will repeat it throughout the day. Thanks much!

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Top of the day to you Jodah and thank you for the compliments. For me it is pre-dawn and your comment helps start my day out with a skip to my step. I have that young son running around so I can only say I am the second best man in my home ;-)

    • tsmog profile image

      Tim Mitchell 

      2 years ago from Escondido, CA

      Awesome. You are dyno-mite-otta-site-right-on with this message. Thanks!

    • Jodah profile image

      John Hansen 

      2 years ago from Queensland Australia

      May I say how dapper you are looking today Eric, and a damn fine motivational writer as well. I am positively positive today that I am the best man in my household :) Good message my friend.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Absolutely true my friend Bill. We have to look for it and create it. We are blessed that we can.

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 

      2 years ago from Olympia, WA

      I read this in the a.m. and thought I had commented, but I got called to work and must have forgotten. Anyway, valuable message here....the good always outweighs the bad if we allow it to do so. :)

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Well Will, let me keep the ball rolling and tell you that you are one fine writer. I just loved the story yesterday. Of course I just love my Arizona where the old west was alive and kicking just 100 years ago.

    • WillStarr profile image

      WillStarr 

      2 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

      We needed this one, Eric!

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Right on Dana, what wonderful words thank you for adding them to this sermon.

    • Dana Tate profile image

      Dana Tate 

      2 years ago from LOS ANGELES

      A person is known by the fruit they bear. When you speak positive words that make people feel good you speak life to their soul. You can brighten someone's whole day just by saying something nice. A person who can understand this has been enlightened; it means they have a good heart and has found the true treasure in life. It takes a good heart to speak "good" because what comes out the mouth came from the heart. And of course we must remember to speak life to ourselves also. It is good to give ourselves thumbs-up, sometimes for the characteristic traits we possess that are positive.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Linda, you need to compliment yourself on being a person trying to do right. You are introspective and that is great unless it is just to find fault. I can help start you out; Linda you are a great writer. Your articles are top notch. You let your light shine for others. You are a very caring person. Now if that makes you blush -- work on that. But they are all true. Now you find 5 more things to compliment yourself on. The tiny amount you must be forgiven for is far outshined by the pleasure you must give our Father.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Thank you Devika, I really like this idea, I am glad I could share it.

    • Ericdierker profile imageAUTHOR

      Eric Dierker 

      2 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Ruby, great to hear from you. You have a great spirit I bet you just love to compliment people. Don't forget yourself today.

    • Carb Diva profile image

      Linda Lum 

      2 years ago from Washington State, USA

      You are absolutely correct in saying that we can't really love others if we can't love ourselves, but Eric, this is one of the toughest things to do (for me). I know what is deep inside; I know what I should be capable of, and I know each and every sin. I feel unworthy. But as a Christian I also know that I have been forgiven. Thanks for reminding me that I need to keep working on accepting that forgiveness.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 

      2 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      Great hub with such a powerful message.

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Richert 

      2 years ago from Southern Illinois

      This is particularly useful for me today, and I plan on using your method. Thank you my friend...

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