God Saved me from Going Postal
This article is not meant to bash the United States Postal Service or to cause any harm to anyone. I'm sharing my story because I ... as a formal Postal Employee, know the stress you endeavor. After losing a close Co-worker behind Postal Stress, it weighed in on my Spirit. Feelings of Darkness outlined with Confusion because ... I was at that same place. However, you have to know ... There is an option and always another solution. No matter what the situation. I understand how we can be driven to satanic thoughts and days of dread. Nonetheless, please know & believe you are not alone.
- USATODAY.com - Woman kills 5, self at postal plant
The shooting deaths of five people by a former postal worker may have been the worst U.S. workplace murder ever committed by a woman, according to experts in on-the-job violence.
No Way Out
Despite all the whispering and finger pointing, surrounding me by my co-workers. I held back the tears once more ... while being escorted off the workroom floor. I couldn't understand how this was happening all over again.
Why hadn't Mr. Thomas spoken up for me? We both knew or at least had a notion I was being set-up. One word from his mouth, could have stopped all this. Yet, everyone just stood by and hoped they'd see a reaction. Nevertheless. I still didn't break ... No. I wasn't crying. Jesus Christ always took care of me. I'd been summoned many exits out the door ... Still. I never broke.
Although it all boiled down to one thing ... Is she a Thief? Of course not. How can you steal something that's issued to you? Something that's rightfully yours. I was accused of "Stealing Travel Pay" yet had no time to prove my innocence. All it took ... was a glimpse into some paperwork.
Procedure was … File a grievance … Set a meeting date … Return to work.
Can you imagine to your surprise being handcuffed and arrested on your job, for a crime you never committed? Something you had nothing to do with? So much anger, hatred, and pain embedded itself in me. After all ... I hadn't even been scheduled a "grievance". Not only was I not guilty ... I had proof.
It was now over a year already since I'd been arrested. My finances had drained, still weren't back in the workforce and no day in court. You see, I was at an all-time low. I wanted to walk in the post office and go postal ... just as my fallen co-workers had done in the past. I felt the need to hurt someone. My anger was so overwhelming I couldn't reason with me anymore. It was as though I had left my body. My life was a mess.
Moreover, I am a Christian and was ready to face Father God ... not for glory ... I had a "Word" for him too. That's just how far gone I was. It had become an obsession to get even. My mind raced searching for a plan to satisfy my self-absorbed oppression. However, Jesus Christ still perform miracles today. Right before our eyes ... And, we never see them coming. What do you think happened next? I'll tell you ... Three angels stopped me.
Meet Myesha Chaney...My first *Messenger*.
First Lady Myesha Chaney
My Fall from Grace
Father God has blessed me for many years ... I had a great career, a beautiful family and anything within reach. All and all I was happy. Then. Everything fell through the cracks. My life had gone from peace to agony. Why? Because, with no explanation my mind started telling me things. Like ... the Post Office was Satan and had bargained with Father God for me. Just like he did in Job 1: 8-12 ...
And the LORD said unto Satan, Hast thou considered my servant Job, that there is none like him in the earth, a perfect and an upright man, one that feareth God, and escheweth evil? Then Satan answered the LORD, and said, Doth Job fear God for nought? Hast not thou made an hedge about him, and about his house, and about all that he hath on every side? thou hast blessed the work of his hands, and his substance is increased in the land. But put forth thine hand now, and touch all that he hath, and he will curse thee to thy face. And the LORD said unto Satan, Behold, all that he hath is in thy power; only upon himself put not forth thine hand.
That was my state of mind. I'm ashamed of it now. I felt Jesus wasn't my friend anymore. That I was alone and, he had left me. When it took so little effort ... to resolve this. I was in so much pain.
Even though it seemed every time I sensed a life-threatening thought ... it got bow-guarded. Myesha Chaney was my first boomerang
I was flipping by TV channels ... when I came across "Preachers of LA". Myesha was doing a segment on something about lipstick. Without even giving her a chance to comprehend, I switched the channel saying under my breath ... she just thinks she's pretty anyway. I wasn't feeling very pretty and was kind a hating at the same time. Only father God wasn't having it. For some unexplained reason ... I cared about judging her. In actuality it bothered me. So, I went back to watch.
Instantly ... the lipstick thing was tossed out the window. I had jumped into a full-blown battle with Bishop Chaney bucking up to a vicious spirit in the form of his baby brother. They were arguing about something concerning their mother. Normally I usually went for all peace. Yet this time I was aching for a fight. Even in the midst of what I was going through my discerning spirit was pretty clever. I mean, if this was acting they were doing a good job of it. Hey ... I was convinced.
Courtesy of Oxygen
This got my attention right away because ... Misery loves company. I was cheering for Bishop Chaney to knock his lights out. My mindset was ... if a Bishop could get this angry, I could ... Yet. Meysha Chaney showed passion. I thought to myself ... How could she be this calm when her husband was in such rage?
After which, Pastor Chaney announced his mother was moving in ... Meysha facial expression shown discontent. Still she never contested it. As I became a faithful viewer ... waiting for a fight, the lipstick thing came up again. It was still in the back of my mind. What was that about? Even better why was it sticking with me?
"Hiding behind the Lipstick" was a powerful conference conducted by Meysha Chaney. Urging women to accept whom they were. Facing the real person inside & not camouflaging the pain. She asked... What's got you down? ... What's hindering your life? ... Why focus on that? ... God made you perfect ... Find the person that God created ... Allow him to bring you back .... Stop hiding behind what happen to you ...
As she spoke it brought tears to my eyes closing in on reality. She made me realize I wasn't that person that wanted to hurt people. I wasn't that same person I used to be before this Career. Myesha spoke of hidden scars planted within our hearts. Stuff you know. You try to hide. Several of my bruises had come from the Postal Service. So, what was my real self? How do I get back? I didn't know me anymore.
Courtesy of Myesha Chaney
There was a twinkle of light embracing my spirit, I didn't want to hide behind my lipstick. Yet, I was still in a dark place. My marriage of 34 years had started to crumble. My career was all but gone. People still had to pay. Nobody cared that I didn't deserve this.
As my shadow of life continued to evaporate. All blame went before the Postal Service. Being very intolerable and not at peace, television had become my only friend. That's where Father God sent me his second "Messenger".
Introducing Pastor Joel Osteen
No Light to See
If not for the joke Joel Olsteen opens with every sermon, I might have not viewed the whole program. It took me awhile to realize Father God was still in this.
Now I'd been a faithful Christian most of my life. Now lately. Pastors weren't turning me on. For me ... This was a new revelation I'd conceived ... kicking the Christian concept. I was by myself. For myself and saw me doing no wrong. How could hearsay, of forced such torture on me? I vowed ... Somebody was telling me why?
OMG! Joel Olsteen sermon "Blessed in the Dark Places" was so overwhelming. This was not happening. When he said, "dark places bring out the better of a person". Don't get stuck in your valley. Faith is trusting God even when you don't understand. I began to wonder ... maybe I'm going through something? Something I could wake up from. I had been through so much for no reason. No logic I could reason with anyway.
Joel explained how his mother was diagnosed with terminal liver cancer in 1981. How they had all been in such a dark place. He said dark places bring blessings from God. Small things would never trouble you again. As he spoke he actually cried with me. His spirit was there. When things were going my way I did take advantage of it.
Quit complaining ... Meet the highest potential ... Keep a good attitude ... Learn to change. Trust God ... he hasn't left you.
All his message was as through it was Jesus Christ himself speaking to me.
Dark places is part of the plan he said ... What was meant for your harm, God will use for good. We are planted in a dark place, to grow.
Assuring me ... if never in a dark place, you never become the full you. I could feel the pain of his testimony remembering his dark places. Joel had given me something to reason with. He had given me a chance to hope ... which is real Faith.
Still, was this meant for me? I was vengeful and not being very faithful. Here by accident. Still determined the Postal Service had done this to me....
Courtesy of LakewoodChurch
Joel Olsteen had certainly given me something to think about. More or less, I still wanted revenge. Just how was I planning on seeking it? I couldn't hold my head up anymore. The Postal Service had marred my name. They had to be exposed. This began to become ... my personal war.
Day and night, thinking thought after thought of retaliation. Having the desire to pile as much hurt on them ... as they had put on me.
I started to feel like my older age, was the motive of this. Now, my services, were no longer wanted. I loved helping the needy ... However, I had become the needy. This was eating me up ...
Feeling sorry for myself and drowning in self-pity ... my cell phone rang. Meysha had got me Set ... Joel had gotten me Ready ... Go was in my own backyard. Father God's third "Messenger" ... Carloyn Overstreet Hatley.
Carolyn Overstreet-Hatley ABR, AFH Broker/CEO
My Helping Hand
Carolyn is my first cousin and real estate consultant ... who often let me whine. She called excited about a property she'd listed. Joy was booming in her spirit. She never worried about anything anyway. So, why would she? She was a broker in her own real estate agency, happily married and always kept it together.
Hey Girl ... was her usual greeting. Immediately I went in on it. She explained that this was enough and to stop hiding behind the Post Office ... My mind went back to Myesha hiding behind the lipstick.
Stop talking crazy be patient there's always light at the end of the tunnel. God will work it out for you. What? How did she know Joel Olsteen had just said the same thing?
It's about contentment Cheryl. Stop asking God to give you back that career and ask him to supply your needs. He knows what you've been through and it may be part of his plan.
She almost quoted everything that Myesha and Joel had said ...
Look what has come from you so far. You've written a book about it, in focused with the right people ... just let it go and let God. No telling what's coming next. Give it time to expand.
Get out of your feelings and correct things to improve you. Work on what makes you better. Embrace that and stop worrying about tomorrow it's not your fight. Satan has the power to keep you down for years. Give it up and go for what you know. Don't let him win.
It was all so clear. This wasn't about me. This wasn't about the Postal Service. This was a battle I was in ... between a Saint & Satan. I had a roof over my head, food in my body, and clothes on my back. Hallelujah ... Everything Father God promised me. Where was my Faith? Did I trust Father's Word ... Trusting him to take care of me.
I asked myself ... Why ... are you Hiding in Darkness? Why ... are you not Content? Jesus Christ the son of God is your Redeemer. At that moment, I fell on my knees in tears ... yes those tears I held back for so long. It was time to submit & allowed Father God to use me.
In my heart I knew ... God was still in control. Any harm I felt inflicted on me by the Postal Service, was not my burden ... All Saints! Please hear me! ... My Father sheep know their "Shepherds Voice" and he was roaring in like thunder ... through Meysha, Joel, and Carolyn.
I have to testify today that I am truly thankful for these three Angels. They are a blessing to me. Allowing the Holy Spirit to lead, guide & direct me back to my true calling. As only they could do. To you all I say ... Never ever doubt any of your worth's. Always know our souls are being led by your teaching. May Father God Bless & Keep each one of you ... You are the testimony to my ... "Real Miracle".
Employee Assistance Program
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