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How Do I Do Unto Others When They Don't Do Unto Me?

Updated on January 2, 2020
North Wind profile image

I have been trying to find out what is life without God and each time I come to the answer, "Nothing".

"And as ye would that men should do to you, do ye also to them likewise." Luke 6:31 K.J.V.

sticky situation
sticky situation

Unless you live in isolation somewhere you can't avoid people. Everywhere you go there are people, and even though most like to present a put-together appearance, generally, people are complicated and messy.

It is not easy dealing with people. Some do it better than others but everybody, and I mean everybody, has stepped on someone else's toes in this life whether intentionally or unintentionally.

Tempers may flare.

Feelings may get hurt.

Relationships may come to an end.

That's just with the people you really know. With the people you don't know a real brawl could go down if someone cuts in the line, if they cut you off on the highway, or if they take your parking space!

In case you think I exaggerate...

As someone who follows the way of Christ, I try to listen to His instructions, one of them being, do unto others as you would have them to do unto you.

I can tell you from experience that acting in this way will not be easy especially since those around you most likely will not act that way towards you. I have rather found that they observe the mercy you give to them and then proceed to step all over you like a dirty doormat.

Acting in the flesh, at this stage,is extremely tempting.

Have you ever been stepped on like a dirty mat by someone?

See results

This stepping all over you can become quite frustrating and sometimes you may feel to scream. The thing is, even when people are not trying to follow this command of Christ, they tend to get stepped on or treated like toilet paper. This causes the bone deep need to rant to even a potted plant (if that is all you can find) about the injustice of it all and state how selfish and demanding other people are.

Can't they have some consideration?

Can't they just peek out of their bubble of self-absorption for one minute and see the fact that they mistreat others daily?

You may yell something like, "Hey! Human here. Not toilet paper!" or maybe something milder like, "There are other people on earth besides you, you know!"

To confront or not to confront? That is the question.

At this point you might be thinking one of two things :

1.) "I am really going to give that person a piece of my mind."

2.) " It makes no sense confronting because how can I make an ignorant person understand?"

I know people who instinctively choose choice one and others who consistently choose choice two.

The Book of Proverbs gives advice about this as well:

"Answer not a fool according to his folly, lest thou also be like unto him."

And,

"Answer a fool according to his folly, lest he be wise in his own conceit."

Proverbs 26: 4-5

So which is it?

I believe that the Bible also has some advice about this in the Book of Ecclesiastes. It says that there is a time and place for everything. Understanding when is the right time to answer or the right time to keep silent is tantamount in these situations.

When He was being led to be crucified, Jesus Himself uttered not a word.

"And when he was accused of the chief priests and elders, he answered nothing." Matthew 27:12 K.J.V.

Yet there were times before when He spoke as the time was right to do so.

"Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it." John 8:44 K.J.V.

Contrary to popular belief, Jesus did stand up for the word of God and stands against evil. He was not always, as the world would call it, 'nice' while on earth.

He was always truthful.

Those who recognized the truth, followed Him after. Some who had been troubled by His words turned away and others who were troubled followed Him knowing He was right.

Sometimes the truth offends and sometimes it does not, but it is always truth.

Samwise telling Frodo the truth that he does not want to face

Truth is spoken without rage

A good indicator for me to know whether I am speaking simply to satisfy my flesh or if I am speaking in order to edify and glorify the name of God is if I speak without anger.

There is a certain calm that comes over you that can assure you that that you speak with no animosity towards the person. You simply wish to call to their attention a fact that you yourself would wish to know if you were in the same position.

As a matter of fact, if we put ourselves in the reverse position and always think what we would be best for us in such a situation, it becomes clearer and a bit easier.

Managing this commandment from Christ, Himself is difficult, but can be done otherwise He would not have given it.

© 2020 North Wind

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    • North Wind profile imageAUTHOR

      North Wind 

      6 weeks ago from The World (for now)

      @ Peggy Woods - Indeed, love has no restraints and if we are honest with ourselves then we would be able to see if we truly love one another as He loved us.

    • Peggy W profile image

      Peggy Woods 

      6 weeks ago from Houston, Texas

      There is a time and a place for everything. But love has no restraints. We are encouraged to love not only our friends and neighbors but our enemies as well. This sentence of yours is so true: "Sometimes the truth offends and sometimes it does not, but it is always truth."

    • North Wind profile imageAUTHOR

      North Wind 

      2 months ago from The World (for now)

      @ Lori Colbo - you have hit the nail on the head. It really makes no difference if we only love those who love us.

      Acting without expectations does fulfill and does not leave one with disappointments, which, if you think about it, causes a lot of people to hold grudges and feel resentment.

      If we live this way we have a greater chance of having contentment and peace.

      Thanks for reading and for your valuable comment!

    • lambservant profile image

      Lori Colbo 

      2 months ago from Pacific Northwest

      I love your forthrightness. One thing that came to mind was Luke 6:32-36: "If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. 33 And if you do good to those who are good to you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners do that. And if you lend to those from whom you expect repayment, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to be repaid in full. But love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. Then your reward will be great, and you will be children of the Most High, because he is kind to the ungrateful and wicked. Be merciful, just as your Father is merciful."

      I think we need to remember to do good with no expectations. That does not mean it is easy to deal with people who step on us (love the photo of the show on gum). Our journey as Christians is to become more like Christ. You're last sentence is spot on.

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