I Too Have My Own Story
Years ago before I began to form thoughts in my own mind, I had no idea where I should begin my life - a life guided by my own wisdom.My mind was limited and controlled with the thoughts that I have inherited from my culture ,my family and from my immediate environment. I couldn't conceive my own wisdom to create something for the goodness of humanity and let my thoughts soar high with imaginations beyond the realm of an ordinary consciousness.That is not to say that my ideas are not discernible nor beyond the grasp of the norm but still, there was always that nagging feeling to live life out of the ordinary and not confined to the conventions of society. It may sound preposterous but it will be interesting to experience a life lived that only a few dared to live.I am talking about the likes of Mother Theresa, Thomas Merton, Mahatma Gandhi et al. I believe in the power of influence that is exercised through actions. The subliminal power of the mind to influence cannot be disregarded if we are aware of its potential to bring change in people and the whole world in general. I am speaking through personal experience. Over the years , I wanted to bring change in me.I wanted to change what kind of a person I am, my impact to humanity,my relationship to the people I love and to the whole world in general. I was at a point in my life where I felt there was a misconnect to the true purpose of my short earthly existence and I felt I needed a change. I was young and vibrant and ready to face the world .What I was not prepared for were the challenges that I had to face and the misconceptions of the so called parameters of success imposed by the dictates of society. Little did I know that all of these demands on me were not needed to fulfill happiness and contentment. Happiness and contentment ,I now come to realize, is not attained by anything material and tangible.It is far more simple and yet more meaningful and guaranteed to last a lifetime.The wisdom of the ages has taught me that happiness and contentment cannot be bought nor sold and cannot be acquired through material merits.The external quality of materialism only lends a temporary bliss and its detrimental repercussions result in the impediment for the search for happiness. Materialism ends up owning you instead of satisfying your quest for contentment.I made a pact to myself that I am letting let go of attachment and accumulation of material things that only serves as burden and impediment in my quest for a life conceived beyond the ordinary.
Over the years , I had always questioned the validity of the "good values" that I was personally subjected to and had been imbued as a young adult. Go to school, finish college, have a career,fall in love ,get married and live happily ever after.... and then you die.Inspite of the fact that I internally rebelled in that predicament ,I did all that and in the same order that I was expected to do .But there was a silent rebellion in me, nagging me and telling me that this is not all there is to life.After accomplishing all that, now what? I feel that is a short sighted insight how life must be lived.I feel I can do better than that .I needed to take onother stand , a different route .I decided to make myself useful to others while I am here because there will be no other chance to perform this role once the light has dimmed and the train has gone.I have always said it as a joke that "MY HIGH IN LIFE IS SERVING OTHERS" and honestly, I do.I had risked being laughed at and ridiculed when I said this to friends.To them ,that is somewhat an unconventional stance in today's moral values which are blindly driven by a consumer oriented society.
Having more brings happiness is what society wants you to believe.A bitter pill to swallow but having more comes with a price tag that most of the time you cannot afford to pay.In a consumer laden society, you are an easy prey and and easy target.Unfortunately,there are trade-offs and nothing is free.You can be eaten alive by the consumer society's hidden guises if you don't know how to play the rules of the game. That being said, what other options do you have? Yes, there is .Look the other way and explore. There is an antidote to what the unfortunate modern world calls "CIVILIZATION". It's called fight or flight. I choose both. I shall now bow to detachment and flee the world.