It's All About You, Just Not in the Way You Think
Let’s be clear from the start – it’s not narcissism, not selfishness, not self-indulgence, not self-centeredness.
Actually, let’s throw out the word self. Too much baggage comes with it.
That’s what life is all about. You.
You are important.
You are special.
You are the only you.
The foundation for our western concept of our origins comes from the first four chapters of the Bible: The Genesis stories of Creation and The Garden of Eden.
These stories tell us God was very excited and impressed when he created Man & Woman – so much so that with their addition to Creation, all was deemed, not just good (as things were five times before), but very good.
Not only that, we were so very good, He desired to walk with us in the Garden, to commune with us. There’s no demand for worship. There’s no wall to make a separation between the Creator and the Created. There is no isolation fueled by reverence and awe in His majesty. There is just a desire for togetherness. He was so intent on this He actually sought Adam & Eve out when He could not find them.
Thus was God’s reaction to the created man and woman. Since we are man & woman, it is reasonable to say thus is God’s reaction to us.
He wants to have a relationship with us.
This is significant -- especially when it is understood the Genesis Creation Stories are the accepted, cherished origin stories of three of the world’s great religions – Judaism, Christianity and Islam.
Here’s some exciting news from these stories: When God created us – you and me -- we were/ are created perfect.
What? Me perfect?
No buts. You are perfect as created.
How can this be?
Think about it. When God created man & woman, he didn’t say, “Not bad for a first attempt, with a little nip here, tuck there, I’ll get it right in the next revision.”
We’re Very Good, as is.
God saw us, stood back, said, “Wow! These folks are way cool! I out did myself. Let’s get to know each other.”
Now that’s perfection. God doesn’t want to make any changes.
So why do you?
There are no buts. This is the way it really is.
You are perfect as created by God.
When we don’t believe this, the problem is not with us. The problem is with our definition of perfection.
Perfection does not mean flawless. It does not mean being able to do everything with no mistakes.
It means you are complete exactly as you are.
Are you supposed to be able to do everything and be everything all the time to everyone?
The only thing you need to do is accept the wondrously glorious fact that you are perfect as you are, right where you stand or sit right now.
It’s always been that way.
It will always be that way.
You’re just not flawless.
Our focus, then is not to be on satisfying our needs wants and desires, but on discovering who we are, our gifts, abilities, talents.
And our limitations.
That’s one of the exciting things about being us. We each have something to bring to the table. It’s important for each of us, therefore, to discover who we are, what makes us tick. And to realize that we need each other. We are social creatures for a reason. We need to work together with acceptance, appreciation, even admiration. We need to support each other, nurture each other.
Unfortunately, American society is not necessarily geared toward nurturing.
But nurture is what is needed.
So in the absence of it, we need to nurture ourselves, then help nurture those around us.
But this is no easy thing to do. Nurture can be uncomfortable. Nurture means freedom, not control. And too often, we want to control the things and the people around us.
It’s time to stop doing that.
Do you like to be controlled? I certainly don’t. Why would any one else like it, then?
And, let’s face it, we also try to control ourselves. We make rules and regulations. “Can’t do that.” “Can’t eat that.” “Should do this or that.”
And what’s the result?
We don’t feel any better about ourselves. All we’ve succeeded in doing is demonstrating we can’t even live up to being the person we think we want to be.
Discovery and nurture. That’s the new focus.
Reinforcement – good.
Encouragement – great.
Expression – even better.
What’s exciting is this can happen at any time in our lives. The results of past choices might make it difficult to make the changes required, but if you’re breathing, you have time to discover who you really are and then try to express that, to live that.
This isn’t about feeding obsessions. This is about living genuine, authentic expressions of who you are.
There’s a lot of what mental health pros call “compensation behavior” happening in the world. A whole lot of us act from a source of fear which means those actions are actually best classified as reactions.
It’s time to stop doing this.
It’s now time to sit down and listen to you. Look inside. Find the peace, the calm, the excitement, the fulfillment, then:
Only then are we living as God created us to live.
Enjoying our perfection.
Rejoicing in the wonder that is us, confident in the knowledge we are “very good.”
That’s why it IS all about you.