Lord Take Charge

"And he said unto me,My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me." - 2 Corinthians 12:9 KJV

When life isn't going as planned and I feel like I'm going to drown in despair; it's easy to think that God isn't listening. Sometimes when I pray, I feel like my words are just bouncing off the ceiling. During these times, all I want to do is crawl into my bed and pull the covers up over my head. I don't want to leave the house. I don't want to go to work. I just want to be left alone to wallow in my self-pity.

Self-destructive behavior will only get you deeper in the pit. Believe me, I have experience in this subject. For example, when I get depressed I like to eat, especially chocolate, and a lot of it. Of course, after I have indulged in a pound or two of "heaven on earth" I feel guilty, bloated, and downright disgusted with myself. All I have succeeded in, is giving myself something else to feel bad about.

I have found that the best cure for self-destruction and self-pity is total dependence on God, and a lot of prayer. Just as the scripture above says, "...my strength is made perfect in weakness." I usually find that when I am at my weakest and I force myself to stand, that is when I receive a kind of gentle push; just enough to get me through. When I look back at the situation that, at the time, seemed so frightening or stressful, I see that either; a) it wasn't as bad as I had imagined it to be or; b) I realize that God was there all the time and He literally carried me the whole way.

His grace is sufficient for me. I am weak, but He is strong and even when I don't feel Him, I know He is always there. So, I do my best to turn my back to the enemy when he whispers in my ear, "you're not good enough, you're not going to make it, you just need to give up." I take a deep breath, whisper a little prayer, and put one foot in front of the other.

"God, give me the courage and grace to get through the valleys. Please let me come out victoriously on the mountain top. Take charge of my life and guide me in the direction you have planned for me. Remove all self-doubt and self-destruction. I give you control, I don't want it anymore. Amen."