ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel

Nonetheless, I became "Nun the less."

Updated on October 5, 2016
ProverbsLady profile image

Janice VC has been a Radio Jockey for years at GoldFM 103.9 Christian Radio. She's also very fond of writing her life's testimonies online.

I'm pretty sure that if you're a devoted RC, you will disagree. Remember, I was once a nun and I was the one who saw my life's transition.

When I was in high school, my teachers and classmates found out how behaved I was because I don't talk much that's why I received the 'most behave' reward in our class twice.

I don't make friends, I don't care about my grades, I don't care if my classmates were receiving medals and having fun studying. I just wanted to go home and be weird because I thought it was the real me though It really confused me.

I recall, when a teacher in literature class asked me about my ambition and goals in life; I just couldn't answer her right away because I felt too empty to say anything.


In February 1999, there were group of nuns from different congregations who came before our graduation with their posters. I was convinced after checking it out without any doubt so I ran back home and begged my mom to let me go with them. I knew she felt sad when I decided to leave them without thinking going to college first and even my older brother discouraged me not to go but I was really excited to see myself in a nun outfit.

My mom actually tried to serve a Dominican Congregation when she was in high school and she also desired to follow the nun she befriended with but she left for a new journey. When I heard it from her, I felt more rapt that made me wrote the congregation to fetch me anyway then I immediately packed my things.

While traveling with the nuns and with this girl of my age from other city who were also fetched that day, we had a surprise serenade from a group of young crew boys when we reached our own cabin. This guy who was holding a guitar came close to where I stood and asked me why I decided to become a nun? I replied, "why the question sir?" and said that he actually liked me and it was like love at first sight. I laughed and told him to go away because no one can stop me.

At last we arrived. I saw my foot stepped out the passenger ship with my bag and I was expecting a feeling of joy yet my shoulder suddenly dropped and I didn't knew why.

It was a huge congregation, mostly beautiful faces, nice place, nice beds, clean clothes and good food but I still felt heavy like there was two huge stones placed above my shoulders that made me so unwell though I was not homesick or feeling lonely. The nuns asked what happened because they knew I was really excited to be there.

My joy really left me. I wondered why.

Again, I woke up early in the morning with other young novitiate candidates to pray with the nuns who has been there for a long time. (I don't want to give more details about this congregation)

I didn't feel giving up at all. I only felt something inside me that I couldn't explain and I'm getting weaker everyday and getting lazy in following their rules. I looked for a Bible to seek comfort yet I can't find any just some prayer booklets and at night the older nuns kept on scaring us about a ghost who lives upstairs that made me question their faith. I said, " I thought God lives here with us."


I'm a very observant person. I noticed that when they prayed with the beads, they fell asleep on their seats. Some yawned 'cause of boredom and some just wanted to finish the long prayer as soon as possible through standing to get something then never returned.

All of a sudden, there was these white flashes happened right in front of my eyes like a prompter. I saw my parents and sibling's faces one by one. I screamed so loud because it was too unusual to believe and understand.

They all asked me what happened yet I had no other word but 'home' that's why the congregation made a final decision.



Since I can't find a bible, I just closed my eyes and talk to God though my mind and tongue couldn't focus in Jesus because His name was only mentioned once and it was all Mary that is full of grace; seemed Jesus was not really there.

While everyone in the room were quietly sleeping, I begged God for mercy to show me the right path and to show me the light then something happened the next day.

It was December and I marked the calendar. I asked the nuns to release me before Christmas because I don't wanted to stay longer there and because I felt so sick but they only teased me---telling me that I only missed my family or longed to have a boyfriend.

Of course not but I really waited for their serious answer. A day called 'Confession' came yet still waiting. All of us in the congregation will have to confess our hidden sins to a priest who were prepared to meet us inside a close room. I found it really awkward yet I grabbed the chance and asked help instead of confessing my sins. I said, "Father... my confession is this, I want to leave this place! please help me get my ticket." Well, no help as expected.

I ran to the washroom crying and threw everyone's clothes on the floor, their bath soaps, shampoo bottles and towels. I screamed there like a prisoner. The older nun (local mother superior) got mad at me and even called me a 'ipokrita' or a hypocritical and to tell you the truth? honestly, I googled it just now: The other word for this is a decoy or a pretender. She was right, because the true God placed me there to observe and see the truth.

Because of what happened, the Italian mother superior came down to see me and gave me a one way ticket. I was so happy because I felt like someone was waiting for me out there but I don't have a boyfriend and my family were not the first reason why I wanted to come back though I also wanted to see them again.

The day before I was finally home, I've met a young preacher. He told me about salvation and God's purpose in my life. Sadly, I could not remember because I was still on process and I believed that day was the first day of my walk with Jesus. He definitely answered my prayer because He saw my desire to find Him in my life.

John 10:27

My Journey continues on my next Hub. Thank you

Comments

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • ProverbsLady profile imageAUTHOR

      Janice Valencia Capulso 

      22 months ago from Gensan

      amen!

    • profile image

      Hi Janice 

      22 months ago

      God is so amazing and His plans is always best for us..

    working

    This website uses cookies

    As a user in the EEA, your approval is needed on a few things. To provide a better website experience, hubpages.com uses cookies (and other similar technologies) and may collect, process, and share personal data. Please choose which areas of our service you consent to our doing so.

    For more information on managing or withdrawing consents and how we handle data, visit our Privacy Policy at: https://hubpages.com/privacy-policy#gdpr

    Show Details
    Necessary
    HubPages Device IDThis is used to identify particular browsers or devices when the access the service, and is used for security reasons.
    LoginThis is necessary to sign in to the HubPages Service.
    Google RecaptchaThis is used to prevent bots and spam. (Privacy Policy)
    AkismetThis is used to detect comment spam. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide data on traffic to our website, all personally identifyable data is anonymized. (Privacy Policy)
    HubPages Traffic PixelThis is used to collect data on traffic to articles and other pages on our site. Unless you are signed in to a HubPages account, all personally identifiable information is anonymized.
    Amazon Web ServicesThis is a cloud services platform that we used to host our service. (Privacy Policy)
    CloudflareThis is a cloud CDN service that we use to efficiently deliver files required for our service to operate such as javascript, cascading style sheets, images, and videos. (Privacy Policy)
    Google Hosted LibrariesJavascript software libraries such as jQuery are loaded at endpoints on the googleapis.com or gstatic.com domains, for performance and efficiency reasons. (Privacy Policy)
    Features
    Google Custom SearchThis is feature allows you to search the site. (Privacy Policy)
    Google MapsSome articles have Google Maps embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    Google ChartsThis is used to display charts and graphs on articles and the author center. (Privacy Policy)
    Google AdSense Host APIThis service allows you to sign up for or associate a Google AdSense account with HubPages, so that you can earn money from ads on your articles. No data is shared unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Google YouTubeSome articles have YouTube videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    VimeoSome articles have Vimeo videos embedded in them. (Privacy Policy)
    PaypalThis is used for a registered author who enrolls in the HubPages Earnings program and requests to be paid via PayPal. No data is shared with Paypal unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook LoginYou can use this to streamline signing up for, or signing in to your Hubpages account. No data is shared with Facebook unless you engage with this feature. (Privacy Policy)
    MavenThis supports the Maven widget and search functionality. (Privacy Policy)
    Marketing
    Google AdSenseThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Google DoubleClickGoogle provides ad serving technology and runs an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Index ExchangeThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    SovrnThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Facebook AdsThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Unified Ad MarketplaceThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    AppNexusThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    OpenxThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Rubicon ProjectThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    TripleLiftThis is an ad network. (Privacy Policy)
    Say MediaWe partner with Say Media to deliver ad campaigns on our sites. (Privacy Policy)
    Remarketing PixelsWe may use remarketing pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to advertise the HubPages Service to people that have visited our sites.
    Conversion Tracking PixelsWe may use conversion tracking pixels from advertising networks such as Google AdWords, Bing Ads, and Facebook in order to identify when an advertisement has successfully resulted in the desired action, such as signing up for the HubPages Service or publishing an article on the HubPages Service.
    Statistics
    Author Google AnalyticsThis is used to provide traffic data and reports to the authors of articles on the HubPages Service. (Privacy Policy)
    ComscoreComScore is a media measurement and analytics company providing marketing data and analytics to enterprises, media and advertising agencies, and publishers. Non-consent will result in ComScore only processing obfuscated personal data. (Privacy Policy)
    Amazon Tracking PixelSome articles display amazon products as part of the Amazon Affiliate program, this pixel provides traffic statistics for those products (Privacy Policy)