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Repentance, the Fertility of Faith

Updated on August 26, 2018
Photo by: Marion Alston
Photo by: Marion Alston | Source

Infertility within the context of which I am writing is regarding the inability to conceive idealism, that in doing so downgrades the formation process of all that has to do with form; information, reformation, conformation, transformation and even can lead to deformation. Infertility is a disease, as seen in the story of a barren wife or woman. What has happened to the form of fertility? It is diseased to the point of being unproductive. What has diseased it? There are many variables that conflict with fertility, yet infertility in and of the body is not the root of the disease. This disease commences on a larger scale and scope. Faith that is healthy and fertile, is faith that repents and conception in the righteousness of repentance lies the reality of the birth of repentant holiness or the miscarriage of righteousness and holiness is the result. The miscarriage of faith can and will deter the birth of repentance and is a sure road to the annihilation of the soul.

The inability to repent is a form of infertility, not to be able to or desire to repent is a disease. To live in a body that utters everything else under the sun, gossips, curses, negativity, etc. yet, repentance is then likened to a dirty word, at a time in life and time where what you believe can only be proven by whether there is hardness internally or not. The hardness of heart will pave the path to unrepentance and this path allows sin to rule even where you think it is conquered and you are more than a conqueror. More than a conqueror of what? If there is even a residue of sin that has not been repentant for what is the conquest, there is still more repentant work to do.

Repentance doesn't end at the altar call to accept salvation. Somehow the ability to repent is the only thing that war is waged against, but the only spoil seized is unrepentance. What is more than a conqueror over sin or unrepentance? It is whosoever will take a stand and repent. Repentance should always be when you have done or said something wrong, it at times, is when you think you are doing and have done every right. We so want to do and be right all of the time, but can we at all times be right, and not be a liar that the truth doesn’t reside, what do I do at that time, I repent, whether I think I am right or wrong, what does being right really mean if sin has to be committed to be right and I offend the Creator of my being.

I think of repentance and being fertile on a higher plane, unrepentance is infertility. The inability to conceptualize a sorrow towards the Creator, not as what can be identified as an idol, something or someone in the place of who the place was created and made for. The Creator created a place within everyone it is known as your ideal. The title or name of God without respect is nothing more than an idol and is not an ideal. The ideal is a space no one is allowed and anything that conflicts with that ideal should be aborted, casting down imaginations and all high things or thoughts that threaten the ideal.

The Book of Genesis opens with a premise, that can distinguish a pivotal point. In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. Something about the space or gap in the theory of God creating is lost in translation. Take the office of prophet and priest, for instance, these offices can be distinguished from one another, why? Because the offices and the roles are different.

A repentant prophet under divine inspiration speaks to the people concerning laws which govern morals and values which must be observed and accomplished to be compliant with the governance of God. The repentant priest speaks with God concerning the laws and other factors concerning man and woman. What distinguishes the prophet from the priest? Their roles distinguish them from one another. Two different men with different offices functioning differently but for the same purpose. Then why is the office of the Creator and God not distinguishable? Which do you believe came first, Creator (Creation) or God (Formation)? I believe and think creation was first, therefore, formation came after.

When I attended Bible school in the early 80’s there was a premise called “the gap theory” the explanation which was given had to do with the fallen angels and fallen man/woman and the gap between the fallen. Today I believe the gap theory has to do with the inability to distinguish between the office of the Creator and God. The link is broken and everything is lumped under the office of God, void of acknowledgment of the Creator.

In reading Scripture there should be a differentiation between the two roles. Modern technology via computerization has assisted my thinking in the way of links and broken links if a link is broken and you click on it there is an error message which allows you to know that you cannot access that site. It is the same exact thing with acknowledging the Creator, there is a broken link that only repentance can repair. All of fallen creation and formation owes the Creator a repentance for every second of the day and night of the lifespan given because of the offenses made knowingly and unknowingly. The broken link spells out the gap theory. What is a theory, something that is not yet proven or unproven. (a supposition or a system of ideas intended to explain something, especially one based on general principles independent of the thing to be explained.)

Approach or attitude can be sketchy because the first commandment admonishes not to take the name of God in vain. I would like to revisit the Hebrews approach of not even putting a vowel in the spelling and pronunciation of the term, let alone the name of God, there were no vowels placed in that either. Yhwh was not pronounced. It makes perfect sense to me now, how a sinner could ever even try to articulate the name of the Most High without repenting to think or speak the title or name. Why no respect for who or where a name resides? A title and name don't reside in the universe, but outside of all its boundaries. When the name or title of the Most High is called in the earth where one dwells positionally, the sound of that utterance transcends barriers beyond the scope of limitations, depending on approach and attitude, If no respect for the name/title or names of God are adhered to, and respect is not given at that place,(the space for repentance) how can one understand roles that differ or reverence for whose name or title it is?

Spiritual infertility makes it possible to pray without recall of bad and wrong intents, motives, emotions, thoughts, desires, and imaginations that are vain and repetitious. Spiritual fertility makes it impossible to speak a word to or towards without repentance. If it is a practice to pray, praise and worship without repentance, it would be because one is functioning in the forgiveness of sin and not repenting of any outstanding sins of omission or commission. There is an inane need not to repent because of forgiveness. What if a person wronged you and never told you they are sorry, would you forgive their wrong or your right? You did nothing that you are aware of that could have set in motion their need to do you wrong, but they do. What exactly is being forgiven, the ability to be and do what is wrong or the need not be the one who is suspect of any wrong? Forgiveness leads towards not away from repentance, if you are being driven away from repentance because of forgiveness, what are you being forgiven of unrepentance?

The manner in which I typed God here (G-d) as it is originally transcribed in other translations is from a teaching I encountered earlier in my journey. I was taught that the Hebrews did not pronounce or even write the title God out because they did not deem it something that should or could be articulated, and this is why the vowel was omitted, try pronouncing it without the vowel, you will only phonetically voice the sound of two consonants G and d which would not equal a term or title just a sound, but those who believed this didn’t even attempt to make the sound. Why is it so today? Is it because of the loss of reverence and respect for who He is.

Repentance is a way of life that has not really been allowed to express itself. What should one do today if the commandment not to use God’s name in vain is broken? There should be repentance made for that sin, at the time that the commandment was written one could be murdered (put to death) for that sin or a blood sacrifice would have to be made. Today when sin is committed, I can repent which is a different covenant than bloodshed.

It is a civilized code of new honor to be able to repent rather than kill a bullock, what is the bullock’s sin? The Bullock wasn’t the one that sinned, it was the one who committed the actual sin. How is the one who committed the sin-free, it applied the blood of the animal to take their place, but all the sinner inherited is unrepentance for a sin they committed, the animal didn't commit the sin. Repentance helps me to understand that when I sin, and all sin is wrong, that I should be willing to repent, and rise above blood shed for sin, be sorry and not bloodthirsty.

I thought about the term “abort” although I realize that it carries a negative twist and connotation with it. Sin and unrepentance are two things that I know I will never need to feel bad about desiring their riddance for good. If two people are in a union and conception first is to take place, why not abort sin and unrepentance from entering in and through the relationship and what has been conceived, rather than conceiving and forming a life then planning to abort it rather than aborting the notions of sin operating through the life which is forming. In ideal, first, abort what really is the detriment of the endeavor and not the infant, no matter what stage it is in. I am not an advocate of birth control, the only control one should use is self-control which is restraining one’s self until marriage. The best method of birth control is not to do what would produce the unplanned birth and then considering aborting after conception, sin should be and should have been the only thought which should be aborted. Abort sin, and the unrepentance that it keeps close company with concerning the conception and birth prior to and you will never need or desire an abortion.

Parents play a big part in this endeavor, what an advantage to desire to conceive because fertility has smiled upon the circumstances which bring it to pass but to neglect what is necessary or needed once in the world, is wrong. This is not a perfect world, and the struggle for a soul is a real one. Why be a contributor to producing what will get the breath and not be able to pass on the words of the universe, “I repent Creator” when sin comes knocking at the door inside and outside the home.

Knowing that only I am accountable for my ability to repent, makes it very clear and personal. Parents aren’t given the ability to control our breath once we receive it, but parents can assist from the podium of parenting by repenting over the life prior to and during the stay within the body. The sorrow of knowing this is not a good world, and it is not influenced by good people all of the time, should awaken the call of repentance, instead of being sorry later and having many regrets.

The home is where we learn to be sorry when we have done or said something that parents disapprove of, by school age we may or may not have had the groundwork laid to meet the challenge elsewhere, if we could be taught no matter what bad thoughts and conduct happen around us, there will always be a need to repent, that you would even have to be in the company of bad behavior, even when it is not you misbehaving. This is what lead me not into temptation speaks today, but only in retrospect, do your part and repent not to go the way towards what tempts or can tempt you to do wrong.

As children that should be available thought, to repent on the spot and not to go where temptation wants to take us. It is not too late for other children when they are taught to repent and have respect for who created it all and respect yourself and stay away from what is not sorry for wrong conduct, character, and behavior. The gravity towards wrong is because of the inability to repent and be sorry for wrong.

Parents teach not to lie and steal, but do they teach what do I do if I fall into temptation and lie and steal? The answer is repent to lessen the chance in the future to repeat the same behavior over and over again until the prison is the next stop and the benefit of remorse for the wrong doesn’t show up or isn’t present within the hardened heart and soul. Repeat offenders are not just those who do time for a crime and paid their time, come out of prison and repeat a criminal act. A repeat offender begins as a sinner that repeats sin, it may not be the same sin, but a sin is a sin. Reprove a sinner towards repentance and a criminal will not emerge to have any remorse. If a sinner doesn't understand repentance, and the criminal doesn't understand remorse the formation process is dwarfed.

Repentance for me originated through acknowledging and understanding, this simple truth, I didn’t create the world that I am living in, but I am subject to every ill that anyone else is subject to, those ills are defined as sins. I didn’t create a sin, but am I exempt? No, I am not. So, what is the answer or resolve to sin? Repentance resolves sin issues faster than anything I know. This journey of coming to this place involves so much and so many people, yet it wasn’t accessible to me but through faith. Within created faith therein lies repentance, within formed faith lies free will that and either accept or reject repentance. I have found in my faith that I am not willing to be saved from repentance, by not doing it, or what am I really saved towards. There is no greater ideal than being or becoming perfect, but all that is transpiring and has transpired in this world is the evidence that I need that repentance for my life has to be a daily devotion and not the result of a one-time altar call. Repentance is a calling, it is holiness calling. Building up yourself on your most holy faith praying in the Holy Ghost. Most Holy faith articulates fertility, pray with repentance and pray with fertility.

We live here in this world whether or not the stay and accommodations suit us or not, but we are living in a world where sin has destroyed too many lives to be satisfied with that outcome. On a personal note, sin had done too much damage to my life prior to coming to know its pernicious ways, that I see that the missing ingredient from this stance I once held was and always will be to repent to the Creator and be sorry to whomever I have caused any pain in this life. To go through this life even thinking that I could possibly be exempt from intentionally or unintentionally, consciously or subconsciously be free from having hurt someone along the way, as well as received hurt along the way, is ludacris and unrealistic.

Sometimes we hurt others and not even give it a care, because carelessness gets a hold and grip that we can’t break, without admitting that we are wrong, whether provoked or otherwise. Will any be able to say within themselves, I have done everything right and offended none? If you can, will you in good conscience be able to say for every day I have lived, I have never offended the Creator of the Universe? What an enormous premise that is, huh.

Take a simple matter, for instance, the roses and flowers grow from the bush, If I cut them from the vine, have I helped or hurt the earth where they flourish. Not realizing that I am slowly killing the vine, by cutting pieces off, is that destructive, or can I justify that by whatever my reason is. If I destroy anything in a world that I did not create, doesn’t that make me destructive and of my own doing, or something passed along. These are little things we are programmed to do without even thinking that we should repent.

If a flower should be cut from the vine, why does it grow there and bloom? Every action requires a reaction, but it is only the reaction based on knowing what is right that counts. Most of the time subliminally we do things that we are not conscious of, hence acknowledgment of the thing done is not available, it is placed in an unrepentant file within the subconscious, after a while these little things are piling up inside with no outlet, the little foxes are spoiling the vine, accruing more and more sin and unrepentance to the account . Daily repentance is an option, but only the one with life can gently utter, I repent, for what I am conscious of and unconscious of. Unconscious thinking and feelings mask the ability to be fertile in the soul and to repent as a daily devotional, repentance before and prior to prayer, praise and worship is essential or who are you praying to and praising? The Idol of God and not the ideal. No one can ever tell me ever again to desire to pray to whom I deem holy, righteous, sacred, and high and lifted up and before I position myself to do that, not to be conscious of where it is I desire to go and to omit to repent before I go.

I call repentance a basin of lavar, it is where cleansing of sins, transgressions, iniquities all take place of where the account of unrepentance is cleared. I do not and will not receive the salvation that tells me that I am saved from daily repenting, because too many things take place during and in an average day to combat with any other stance other than repentance. There is no battle left to fight when you have realized the biggest and worst (sin) has been defeated, but you may not know sin’s treacherous twin sister/brother (unrepentance). Sin tells unrepentance cut them some slack so that they not repent, repentance tells unrepentance, no way, go sit down and be quiet, to the attentive soul repent and do the first works.

Infertility is diagnosed as being an inability to conceive a child with many reasons why the infertility of the soul and spirit comes from a bigger zone. A fertile soul and spirit are a repentant one, the spirit and soul void of the ability to repent is infertile, and grows nothing but poisonous weeds and tares. Let the tares and wheat grow together, diagnose and be able to distinguish between what is a tare and what is wheat because the wheat stays but the tares should be quenched by the fire of repentance. Repentance is likened to fire it burns up all dross, past, present, and future.

What happens if we forget a painful past as we embark upon a future and destiny full of promises that the past cannot compete with, without repenting over and for our own past endeavors, the past is like opening Pandora’s Box where the unexamined life is not worth living, we must examine the past now because judgment day is every day and the past is marked for repentance that gets lost in the struggle for solace desired now (presently) and in the future. We know the past is not as vital as the present, yet, there are treasures even in the darkest of past, unexamined by the maturity it takes for me to my ownself be true, telling myself the truth regardless of how dreary things are and how uncomfortable I feel as a result is aligning myself with honesty.

Repentance exposes the deceitful heart, and it halts its desperate rebellion and wickedness from existing. The conscience stands up as the judge of the soul and no reasoning will do that cannot undergo judgment. The judgment of self is the best thing I have ever done for myself, but I know it is a daily ongoing journey. I had no idea judgment was so kind, because I always sought after mercy to be excused and to escape accusation. Yet accusation paves the way to repentance. Where are those thine accusers, does anyone accuse you, no one Lord, go and sin no more. I often wondered about this “go and sin no more” I asked myself is this even possible? It is very easy from a “no sin committed” perspective, Jesus had no sin and adhering to that mindset, however, the practical or pragmatic reality to this is the charge of going and sinning no more that is only accomplished through repentance, or your flesh is taking you on a bad trip that your soul should not want to go on under no circumstances, because the flesh can profit no good thing apart from repentance. If, when, why, and whatever or however sin is committed, the immediate response to sin is repentance, it must be quick as it is powerful.

Another dictionary definition for infertility includes being unable to procreate, well humans do not have the real ability to create, how would they procreate? Only the Creator has the true rights to creation, nothing formed has that ability it is a self-prophecy of something that is not possible. Are the computerized or technological systems the result of man creating or inventing from matter, substance, and energy already created? The latter, inventing or producing and the acknowledgment for the created aspect should go solely to who created the base or root from where something invented comes from. Why is there confusion when it comes to who is who? There is an absence of clarity and understanding which assists in determining who created and who cannot truly create. Infertility speaks of a finite man wanting to create, rather than full compliance with his form and all that is allotted for and within that form. Fertility speaks of a faith that the fall just could not extinguish because mercy leads to repentance the fertility of spirit and soul.

Universe is not merely one voice alone, but it is every voice speaking the same thing, rising to the occasion, you can't repent for me and I can't repent for you, my ultimate prayer is that every voice would receive the call and on one accord make the determination one by one to shift the universe back in order and out of the fallen state by individually saying "I repent" with the grief and sorrow, which are the most somber of chords, yet the most joyous.


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