When Trouble Has You, and You're out of Gas. When Anger Boils, and a Soft Answer Has Healing in Its Wings.

Have you ever heard the phrase "our strengths can be our weaknesses?" In this dualistic world we inhabit, there is nothing more perplexing than staring at the paradoxes we live with. We:

Push the love of our lives out of our lives

And - Our strengths can be our greatest Weaknesses.

Getting through this life requires balancing and understanding - How We Trip Ourselves Up. How we tread across the ground is based upon a complex internal measurement of muscles, stress, speed and strength.

When we push the love of our lives out of our lives it can be because of a host of miscalculations. Too strong there, not attentive here, missing and ignored issues, overly emphasized issues. We get so used to having noise in the background, we literally can not calm our brains unless they are overly stimulated, so that then we can restfully do our homework.

How Do We See Ourselves?

How Hot, Cool, Impressive, "Caliente" or "Mahvelous"

The kid was proud of expressing himself when he was 12. He had a ready comment and a critical analysis of every little event. This ability led him to the debate club, and got him into school politics. Because he was quick on the uptake and had those charming verbal talents, he had some friends who would step in and fight for him when he got into trouble with those guys who didn't know what clever was, or how to be intimidated by a "big mouth". This got him through college and into a great sales job. But his mouth started getting him into trouble. He started talking back to his immediate supervisors. A couple jobs later, he decided to start his own company. Being his own boss, he could talk back to himself, and laugh and abuse his employees.

He was a high energy guy and knew his business and became very comfortable as a small business man. But then a big night came. He had been drinking, and the cops stopped him. He was profusely out of control, and the officer told him to quiet down. He came up with those words that started an avalanche. "You can't shush me, I'm Joe Jones!"

Turns out the cop could shush him. And he went to jail. His original strengths became the inhabitants of his House of Undoing. Since then he treads a little softer and processes his environment along with his own "temperature". He is now trying to balance and alter his perceptions after a strip search, a fine and a day in court got him to look at himself differently.

"If I Just Confess, I'll Be Forgiven" - There Are Approaches of Renewal

Some people are born with "strengths" which are endearing, self effacing, engaging and apologetic. His sister Jane had grown up in an environment which rewarded her for being accommodating and endearing. At first, these people, when they are young, seem to be diplomats. They have lots of friends, are a part of several cliques. Being often intelligent, they can be so engaging that life rewards them in one way or another and this pushes them forward into pleasantness and pleasing conduct and behaviors that seem to work and eventually mature them in a winning way.

Because we lose our clarity of Judgment and Perception, and are unable to see ourselves in order to correct ourselves. Our House of Undoing -- loaded with talent and power, can spell doom for our reputation and resume. Maturation becomes the Key.

However Renewed Consciousness Can Bring Us Houses of RE-Doing. There are also better paths that emerge because of Talents of RE Doing.

Samuel was at a key point in his life. He valued this girl friend. She was persuasive and complicated. She was the kind of woman he imagined he could wed. She made him pretty nervous, and of course, hyper alert.

A Soft Answer Turns Away Wrath!

These are the times when our House of ReConstruction can mean something wonderful in both lives. New discussions based on NOT UNDOING themselves at a party can evolve quickly into smooth and charmed moves.epithets that were not being hurled settled into tasty teas. His sweet and apologetic manner seemed to elevate its head at the most appropriate time. The kind of woman he really wanted was noticeably alert at his renewed response. He learned later what an Apology can do, and how "repentance" can enliven a life.

Sometimes our brains can stop working and we stop worrying about how we are doing. The "Devil Take the Hindmost" -- "My friends are my friends and the rest of you be damned."

America is a great place. I absolutely love America! But one thing about us is that because self expression is such a sacred right, we can develop callouses where our refined sensibilities could be.

Maybe it's the House of Undoing that acts as a signpost along the way. Maybe we could all learn to smooth out our circles and thus glory in the beauty of balanced and well perceived self development.

After all, there is no need to be afraid of changing. Because what makes us special is not our style, but things much more important.

It's NOT The House of our Undoing, Its The Daily Reconstruction in Our Lives and With Our Loves.

Our hearts, souls and character. You won't lose what makes you special, you will gain what is most refined.