Strapping On The boots and Leaving the Body

Burning with a desire I was quite accustomed to (obsession), I started my attempts to leave the body.

Ah yes, I remember the long nights laying still on my bed, headphones in playing some guided meditation in the dark, with the scent of sandalwood heavy in the air.

There I lay many a time following the steps I was given. Lay down and don't move, then begin to relax each part of your body in what is known as "progressive relaxation". I came to despise hearing the phrase, for whatever reason. Either I fell asleep after getting halfway up my legs, or I could never relax anything besides my arms and legs. My head especially was stubborn. I recall that I would always begin to feel the "vibrational state" after starting with my legs, then feeling too energized to continue, thus ruining all of my progress. (Now that I think of it, perhaps I should have started Head- down?)

The vibrational state is a phenomenon known well to those who practice astral projection or meditation in general. Basically, at a certain point when a mediation/ relaxation has deepened enough a sensation of buzzing energy begins to course through the body. Some theorize this is the energy body becoming active, some say it is the actual separation of body from mind. Whatever it is, it always directly precedes separation of consciousness from the body and thus Astral Projection. I personally believe it is that the subtle body has been energized enough (and the physical has been relaxed enough) that it becomes the focused vehicle for consciousness. Just my theory.

We use this same "other vehicle" in dreams. Every night we go forth into another body. I will give tales of my lucid dreams in the future, but suffice it now to say that in dreams- especially lucid ones- you realize you ARE in a body that is not your usual one.

Hundreds of hours I spent trying to figure out how to stay still. At first 20 minutes was as long as I could go. 30 minutes was a grand achievement. Any longer and my body was screaming. "Get up! get UP! There are things to do, I am uncomfortable. I am too hot! Agh! My back huuuuurrrts!" It was like trying to hold down a child. It still is a lot of the time. Around the 45 minute mark, if all went well and my will exceptionally strong, things would start to get interesting. Not every time, but occasionally strange things would happen. Ever so often maybe a strange sound, or colors becoming more vivid. More often I found I was simply supremely uncomfortable, or at a new level of relaxed... which is nice. But... not what I sought. Only once or twice did I make it more than an hour. I cannot even remember what it was like. But this was forever ago. Despite these small achievements, all I found was darkness and disappointment. I started to wonder, "Is there something wrong with me? How is it so easy for these other people?" Once or twice I gave up the practice... but never for too long. I was too obsessed... however at one point I did decide to take a break and just focus on my world around me... have some fun. There was a lockin at a skating ring all my friends were going to. Staying up all night with my friends and possibly cute girls? Sign me up!

Little did I know fate had other plans for setting up this event...