The Boy Teacher and The Father Student; What IS Good Or Bad?
Just A Thought
Bring It On
What is good or bad? That is hilarious and perplexing at the same time. We are scratching our head trying to come up with good or bad people. Good or bad things they might do really does not make them good or bad. My buddy Dan Smith judges not. Yet he deals with good and bad people. I generally am loving, but my wife says I do good and bad stuff. My young son does good and bad stuff. Maybe I am a loser as I think good or bad stuff are basically the same.
B: Dad why do you yell at me?
F: Because I am Irish. We just yell like your mom Vietnamese.
B: So if I yell that is not bad?
F: Try to tone it down outside of the house, but yes, around here yelling is normal. It has to do with culture and tonal and non-tonal languages and passion. It just is.
B: So when you and mom yell at each other you are not mad?
F: Son I honestly cannot remember the last time I was mad at your mom. That might be strange. She does what she does. In the end what she does is good and not bad. It just works out alright.
B: That makes no sense at all. You get angry with me.
F: No way buddy I get mad at what you might do, but never mad at you. That is why I like action movies. You can scream at what the guy does, but maybe he does it for the right reason. That is so fun. You are always asking if he is a good guy or a bad guy.
B: I have friends that are bad dad. I know it. The way they are is bad. Like bullies I think.
F: I get you buddy, I really do. But at fourth grade what might make them bully? Because they are mean inside? Does being mean come from the outside?
B: Ha ha ha ha! I got you. I remember what you said about the Rattlesnake. N&N and F&F. See I can beat you.
F: Hey boy do you remember what that means? I mean the words they mean?
B: I think if we fight or runaway and if our parents teach us right.
F: You scare me son. I think I just might runaway.
For No Reason A Favorite
Ancient Maybe
Always question
Once again I went too far in talking with him. How does a nine year old remember just casual conversations about life? I just throw out gibberish but he gets it and spits it back out. I better take it easy. Here is an example of problems.
B: Dad what were you reading last night while I was playing my video games.
F: Sorry. Buddy Sometimes I actually read out loud because it helps me remember. And don’t even ask why.
B: OK, but it sounded like you were talking about a house and people having a seat in it and that you were a president.
F: How do you do that while you are playing on your thing and listen at the same time?
B: Dad that is like school. Sometimes you have to do something while someone is talking.
F: So what was I reading smarty pants?
B: I don’t know.
F: OK so why was I a president?
B: Because you met mom in Vietnam when you were working there. Something about dealing with other places. And you have to be a president to do that.
F: Whoa kid that is interesting but maybe correct in a way.
F: So what about a house and a seat?
B: Something about where some people live to help us.
F: Wow that is cool too. Anything else?
B: No just – mumble mumble.
F: Maybe we talk about my book some other time. Eat your food.
B: It is that big fat one next to your chair.
F: Son you go “too far too fast”.
B: Big deal! What is the book about?
F: Well it is about a bunch of stuff but what I was reading is called the Constitution because I am strange.
B: I know that dad – duh. So what is that?
F: Good question.
B: So what was that about a house and a seat?
F: Just say you can get invited to the House but the big boys and girls get a seat at the table. Clearly more complicated. But for another time.
B: Ok, so were you president?
F: That part is about deals with the whole United States not really about small companies like mine was.
B: You are right that is too much. Worse than my chapter books for school. Boring!
F: I agree, that is why normal people do not read that gobaldey gook.
Just Suggesting
My Dad Was A Blow Man -- I Do Reed
It Might Be For You
I have no idea of when to teach civics and the constitution to a child. I just do not. He has enough to do with school, Bible studies and learning a second language. That is enough I figure. Not to mention sports and just in general messing around. Learning how to cook and do chores takes up even more time.
With that said I would figure he will continue to ask about it and why I read such boring stuff. Such is life. Now we move on to our last week. When he was much younger we did not even allow wooden pistols in the house. Well a whole bunch has changed.
F: What heck? Mom bought you a battery powered Nerf rifle?
B: Yes and I am going to beat you with it.
F: No way can you beat my Gatling gun. And let’s not forget to wear glasses this time. We will put an eye out. No intentional head shots and nothing to do with “down there”.
B: You are going to lose so bad it will be sad.
F: But you run and hide in your room so it gets boring. No office or kitchen and no locking yourself in a room.
B: OK I promise – hihihi
F: Then on ten let the battle begin.
(The nerf “bullets” really don’t hurt. But losing does)
B: Dad no ripping off my armor. If I have a blanket on you cannot pull it off.
F: I do not agree to that. I never wear armor.
B: That is because you are too big to get it around you. Ha Ha.
F: Yes, but I can kick your small but to hell and back.
I am just putting on shoes to go out. Gabe is eating cereal and fresh fruit with low fat milk. I figure Blueberries and Strawberry. I am not allowed to get into that. Mom rules that part but whole grain oats are the deal. And the little devil loads up on me and shoots me hard ten times. Now that is just wrong. LoL.
But there is so much peace here it is scary. We are doing planning for our “Mallow” forts. Actually clubhouses. He wants one of his own this year. If I do it right I can let the plants up to 6 feet and about 5 feet out.
But in the best time you can hide in there and no-one can see you. Way too much fun.
We have some serious issues around here. Well let me take that back.
F: Son did you know your mom went to the Emergency Room the other night.
S: Dad, I am not stupid. But she came home just fine. She just needs you to drive her.
F: Just what do you worry about boy?
B: Nothing at all, except tests. Mom says everything is for a reason.
Comments
AUTHORIf I missed any comments I apologize -- maybe my editor is notifying me in a not so proper order.
- AUTHOR
Dora that let go of other stuff and just doing the love stuff is a training in progress for both of us. We being doing good in that arena.
- AUTHOR
Kari, sore throat for days so I took him to urgent care. Just a virus. But oh my goodness tongue depressors and those surgical type gloves. What a blast while we waited. He made a double balloon. He said "I want to get sick again" of course just for funny.
You and your son are so connected that it is easy for him to "get" you. You have what many parents long for and need. I applaud you.
The boy is wise beyond his years. That is the best part of being a kid, not worrying.
- AUTHOR
John in a bit I am doing some climbing. I do not do it to be safe. And I do not do it with my sons to be safe. My elder says; "Get in shape" and my younger says; "I can do it dad". Arizonans are so like Australians. Exposure and ropes will lead the day. Your folks took the risk, good on them.
- AUTHOR
Manitita, having a Nurse mom and a big sister and a nephew nurse. I learned early on that doctors treat illness and nurses treat people. Far more tough and brutal.
I nurse my wife and son when needed like now.
In 30 years I figure I have not entered a room of darkness without turning on a light -- of course I speak of mind, body and spirit not the light switch.
You are a light, a "Lantern Carrier". This is as good as it must be.
Yes, it is the thrill of the risk that is often the appeal to people, and yes Aussies, in general, are adventure seekers. That explains why most people on the volcano were Aussies. They knew they were flirting with danger and am sure they probably signed an indemnity when they booked the tour.
I love the philosophy of this conversation and yes, it's great for the kid (In my poor mind). I commend you here.
Some nurses don't like the patient who is always asking for pain killers, giving some lame excuse. Mc Caffery - an expert medical writer - says that pain is what the patient says it is.
Brings me to good and bad. It's all about how each one sees it, I suppose. Vivekananda says that good is that which makes you strong; evil is that which makes you weak.
Guruji says the room of the mind is darkness (Bad) and the room of the Heart (Good), is Light. If you are walking towards the dark and you want light, then you turn towards the sunrise. It's a bit like that. Ha ha.
I rather like this piece.
- AUTHOR
John our Mr. Hebb told that it is one of the most active Volcanoes in the world. When I was too young I climbed up Popōcatepētl. (Puebla Mexico) A different story with monks. It was so exciting. It could have gone real bad real fast.
The good and bad of adventure often ends in the bad.
To my limited understanding Aussies are adventure seekers. And without the chance of eruption they might not have gone.
I reckon I do not know good or bad there.
- AUTHOR
Bill I thank you for dropping by and leaving a nice note. Last night we agreed to 3 chess matches. Sunday afternoon.
I think today will be 1 John 4 finishing up.
Well apparently there was a current rating of 2...which is the highest it can go and they still operate the tours...however they were warned that the volcano is very unstable and can be volatile without warning
They were actually in the crater of the volcano when it erupted
- AUTHOR
Thanks John I am sorry for your nations losses.
Anyone can sue I suppose.
I think the best concept here is sky diving. I mean really? You don't know and accept the risks? I mean that is why you do it.
OTOH if the operator did not operate seismographic equipment and have evacuation contingencies?
At least you don't bored, Eric. Sounds like a lot of fun for an early Sunday morning. Bet you can't find me!
Great stuff, Eric. Good or bad is relative and depends on who is judging it I guess. You just have to use your own discernment and make your own decision. Oh in regard to the Volcano eruption in New Zealand...8 out of ten dead so far were Australian. Now, that was bad but do we blame the tour operators for taking such risks when the tourists were warned of the dangers?
- AUTHOR
Thank you Pamela. We are entering that phase where how he thinks and feels is quite separate than me. But I still am the boss.
I think it is so important to separate the behavior and address is from te boy. you seem to do that quite well. You and your son seem to have a very special relationship, and you are truly blessed Eric. This was another interesting article about your relationship and I never tired of reading them.
- AUTHOR
Lori in about ten minutes he will read and discuss Amendment 1. He will then hold it against me in our "court of home". That "freedom of speech" is brutal. I think I should be the only one to speak freely in my home LoL hi hi hi.
- AUTHOR
Hi Elijah and welcome. I pray all is well. OK I am fixing the teas. Gabe has sore throat so teas.
You make great points. You excite me for reading some more articles tonight - I will head into State's rights. It is cool to read and then challenge to come up with stuff from Bible and Buddha.
- AUTHOR
Ruby I was hired by ranchers to hunt and kill rabbits and "Gophers" The rabbits in 100's of thousand eat the cattle grazing food. The gophers dig holes that break cattle and horse legs.
Saw 'em have to put a horse "down" so.
Caliber 22 rifles. I was hired because I could shoot and kill out of the back end of a pickup truck moving. Miller was the rancher's name - well "uncle" Miller.
Taught me good to not kill a rattlesnake.
You have some interesting conversations. I waited till my kids were 12 and 13 to teach them about civics and the Constitution but even then it may have been too complicated for them. Good try though.
Blessings,
Denise
You and the boy are so special.
Brother Eric, Long ago I discovered "bad and good" depends on the view of the beholder. They are terms that reflect what side of it stands the beholder at the moment of their decision. That is why the Buddha said "seek the middle path" and the Christ said "seek the joining point of the two sides" when he said "seek the narrow way with the straight gate." It's like a day, at all times there's a dark and light side with a tiny time when it is neither which is the space they both spoke of and the creation story called "the tree of life." To me, that's what your saying "Does being mean come from the outside" imply, "from which perspective is the speaker looking."
I don't find the Constitution to be boring stuff, it's how to look at the government to see if it is governing according to it. The governors say it is ambiguous but I don't see that to be true. Take Article 2.4, it's clear that it's talking about any law in this nation but the lawmakers say it only mean federal laws. That is the kind of problem we run into when we are not walking in the joining of the two sides.
I believe your son has found "the middle path", my friend, you have taught him well. And Thanks for sharing it.
Like always, it was fun to read your conversation with Gabe. Who knows what's good or bad? Depends on what's been taught, what country, etc. The thought of killing an animal brings me to tears, but some kill for much needed food. So judge not and all will be fine.
- AUTHOR
Bill you ignore feelings and trouble starts to work through and bad becomes a glue and love beats that. Bev will be just fine. I just know it. Because what you do is love. And give my love to Maggie and that other Rag Tag you got's.
Bev has been sick the past week...inflamed lungs, asthma stuff....she will be all right. We've got love to keep her on the right track. I reckon that's what you're talking about in these complicated conversations with your brilliant son. :)
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