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The Basis of Choosing a Life Partner in Islam

Updated on March 31, 2017
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Muhammad Helmy studied Islamic Sharia in the Faculty of Law. He is currently studying the Qur'an in depth.


One shouldn't look for a perfect partner. No one is perfect. Find someone with personality flaws that you can deal with. Family is important in Islam. That's the reason why choosing the right partner is critical in Islam. In Islam:

  1. Families has goals contribute to the development of the society.
  2. Families are the cells of the society.
  3. Healthy cells make a healthy society.

By completing the article, the reader will learn:

  1. The basis of choosing a husband in Islam. (With a recommended video to watch)
  2. About the qualified wife.
  3. The basis of choosing a wife in Islam. (With a recommended video to watch)
  4. An example of a Muslim country that finds the guidelines in this article simple and helpful.
  5. Finally, the reader will be invited to share his opinion through a poll.

The Basis Of Choosing A Husband In Islam:

1- He should be a religious man.

What does a religious man mean?

It simply means a man who sticks to the five pillars of Islam, which is the minimum requirement of being a Muslim.

Muslims learn from Islam great life values and principles. That makes a religious Muslim man necessarily a good reliable one. For example, when a good/religious Muslim man loves his wife, he honors her. When he hates his wife, he doesn't wrong her.

A religious man is not:

  • A man with a membership in an Islamic organization.
  • An extremist.
  • A man with a beard.

In other words, if the man looks religious but one can tell from his behavior that he has no values–a liar for example - that means he is not the religious man that we are discussing here, period. Drop such a man from your list even if he was driving a Ferrari .

2- He has a job and able to take care of the family financially.

3- He knows how to be gentle with you as a woman.

4- He is Handsome.

5- He is young.

6- He is compatible with the woman in terms:

  • Age.
  • Education.
  • Finance.
  • Intellectual capabilities.
  • Physical abilities.

Vodeo: The Right Husband in Islam

About The Qualified Wife:

A qualified wife is:

  • A source of happiness, tranquility, and serenity in her family.
  • Responsible for the upbringing of children based on values, good morals, and positive habits.

It is easier for an unqualified wife be:

  • A source of trouble for her children and husband.
  • Responsible for some bad habits acquired by children.
  • Responsible for part of the criminal minds in the society.

The Basis Of Choosing A Wife In Islam:

1- To be religious.

A wife must have principles, values, and morals. Islam teaches women all the required values for life in general and marriage in particular.

If a man has to choose between two women, he should choose the religious one even if she was less beautiful. The same is contrary to what is happening in non-Muslims communities.

A religious wife helps her husband to be religious too. When he wants to go against the values, she doesn't agree. In other words, she refuses to be a partner in crime.

Muslim men don’t face a problem because they rely upon a reliable Islamic knowledge-base.

2- To be beautiful.

Look for the religious and beautiful woman. Don't marry the beautiful that was raised in a bad environment. A beautiful woman should be kind. She should have good listening skills. However, She should not be:

  • A trouble-maker.
  • Provocative.
  • Shopaholic.
  • Abusive.
  • Shameless.
  • Obscene.
  • Acting sick to get attention.
  • Suspicious.
  • Sarcastic.
  • Alcoholic or drug addict.

3- To be from a decent family, which means:

  • Her parents, uncles, and aunties are well educated and in decent jobs.
  • Her parents are preferably rich.
  • None of her family members has a criminal record.

Muslim countries–such as the United Arabs of Emirates- find the guidelines mentioned in this article simple, helpful and easy to follow.

All things considered, partners need to be compatible with each other in terms:

  • Values and principles.
  • Capabilities.

Muslims don't go to hell for not following the previous guidelines. But they face concrete problems. After that, they go to scholars looking for a solution in Islam for their problems. That raises a critical question. Before you turn to Islam looking for a solution. Why did you ignore the guidelines provided by Islam? Please share your opinion through the following poll.

Do you think that following the guidelines above will result in making a better community for all?

See results

© 2017 Muhammad Helmy


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