“You Are One Person Away from Making or Breaking Your Relationship Destiny" Part 1
“God will send one person into a life to bless and enhance it while Satan seeks to send one person to destroy a life”
In the beginning God told Adam that it was not good for man to be alone so he took a rib from his side and created woman. The question remains how was Adam alone when God was with him? One school of thought is that God is a Spirit (John 4:24) and God knew Adam needed someone to relate to on a Physical and Spiritual level. God was in charge of Eve being introduced into Adams life and the two were harmoniously in love with each other. Despite God’s introduction of Eve to Adam one thing was certain and that was their free right to choose. The tree of the knowledge of good and evil was placed in the midst of the garden so the free right to choose could remain intact. God simply told them not to eat of it, but their right to choose was not taken away. Christian inspired relationships do not relinquish the right for the other spouse to make choices. To be involved in such a relationship begins the process of breaking the personal destiny God has in mind. To be under the control and manipulation of another is not the will of God and God never intended for another human being to rule over another. The process involved in which a relationship begins should be examined closely by not moving so quickly, praying and seeking the counsel of other biblical qualified people because any person influenced by emotions lust and even demonic forces are headed for disaster.
Motive in relationship
The motive for entering a relationship can either make or break a person’s destiny. People get married or seek out companionship for many reasons; some of those reasons being they feel they are getting to old, they want to move out of a parent’s house, they’ve fallen in love with the concept of marriage or they simply want the license to have sex to name a few. From God’s perspective the only motive should be “love”. Some characteristic from God’s perspective to look for include –
Is the person born again?
2 Corinthians 6:14-17-
Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
Is the idea of marriage respected or treated lightly?
Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous.
Is the woman looking for the man or is the man looking for the woman?
He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.
Is the man willing to leave the provision of his parents and become the provider?
Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
Is marriage being entered into as a trial period or with the mindset of lifetime commitment?
1 Corinthians 7:39
A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord.
Is the man willing to be selfless or selfish?
Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her,
Is the woman willing to be subject to the man?
1 Peter 3:1
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives,
These are not an exhaustive view of the characteristics God requires according to scripture, but only a few.
The biblical law of effectiveness in relationship declares that anything out of place will not be productive
A relationship entered into without God and his principles is out of place for anything productive to happen in it. There is no agreement so the relationship will head in one direction while God is in another. Amos 3:3 declares can two walk together except they be agreed? The answer is no because two visions is di-vision and Jesus said that a house that is divided against itself cannot stand. Couples must come into agreement with God’s Word and themselves to be productive in the relationship.
The importance of covenant in relationship
The relationship between God and man should be so important that no one can break it. It should be known that Jesus said he would never leave or forsake the Christian relationship (Hebrews 13:5). If anyone leaves it will always be the person and even then God declares that he is married to the backslider (Jeremiah 3:14). In the same way couples should be committed to the vows that they have or will make before God.
Listening to others outside of the covenant relationship may lead to unproductive behavior
Genesis 3:3 - The woman said to the serpent, "From the fruit of the trees of the garden we may eat; but from the fruit of the tree which is in the middle of the garden, God has said, 'You shall not eat from it or touch it, or you will die.'" The serpent said to the woman, "You surely will not die!…
The covenant in the Garden was between God, Adam and Eve but Satan who was outside of that covenant began to speak into that covenant. In the same way Satan will use others to speak into a covenant relationship for the cause of bringing unproductive behavior. Single friends or family members have no business speaking their thoughts and emotions into a marriage they have no investment in. Stay under the blessing of God for relationship by abiding in his word. Genesis 1:28 declares that God blessed them and said…. Be fruitful multiply replenish subdue and have dominion. The blessing of productiveness is in what God has said and if obedience to what he has said is followed then productiveness will follow.
Fruitfulness – Child bearing is prevalent today with many pregnancies occurring outside of marriage where fathers are absent and single mothers are left alone to raise the child. Fruitfulness is more than just child bearing… but providing, protecting and preserving for productiveness.
Multiply – To take something from seed form that’s productive and do it over and over.
Replenish – A person replenishing must have the “ability to do” as well as everything falling into place once it is done.
Subdue – To subdue is to conquer
Dominion – To have dominion is to control
Out of place and unproductive behavior happens when trying to accomplish in relationship what only God can.
Genesis 3:7 - When the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was desirable to make one wise, she took from its fruit and ate; and she gave also to her husband with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both of them were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loin coverings.
Adam and Eve were out of place and unproductive at what they trying to accomplish for themselves because they were out of relation with the creator and source of all creation. God created the fig leaves and placed them in the right place for production which was the ground, But the couple remove the leaves from its source (ground) because they were out of place from their source (God). What they did was not successful because eventually the fig leaves died. God stepped in and made them coats of skin, a covering from which an animal had to die. God longs for couples to come to him for advice instead of trying to do things on their own. Proverbs 3:6 declares in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.
Out of place through hiding leads to unproductive behavior
Genesis 3:8-9 - They heard the sound of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and the man and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God among the trees of the garden. Then the LORD God called to the man, and said to him, "Where are you?"…
People who fail to take responsibility for their actions will never end up to where God wants them to go. People hide for various reasons such as guilt and shame, low self-esteem, not wanting to be alone and many other reasons. Adam and Eve hid behind the trees, but people hide behind denial of what’s really going on so they remain a victim of their circumstances. God’s question to Adam was not something that he did not already know, but it was a question to cause him to reflect on where he was so he could take responsibility for his actions. God can send the right person in life but it can seem like the wrong one if personal responsibility is ignored. Adam later blamed God and Eve …
Genesis 3:12 - The man said, "The woman whom you gave to be with me, she gave me from the tree, and I ate."