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How to Tame Your Tongue and Change Your Life

Updated on August 11, 2019

Speaking Life...Not Death

Indeed, we all make many mistakes. For if we could control our tongues, we would be perfect and could also control ourselves in every other way.

We can make a large horse go wherever we want by means of a small bit in its mouth. And a small rudder makes a huge ship turn wherever the pilot chooses to go, even though the winds are strong. In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire. And the tongue is a flame of fire. It is a whole world of wickedness, corrupting your entire body. It can set your whole life on fire, for it is set on fire by hell itself. ~James 3:2-6

Why is it so hard to tame the tongue? We praise God one second and speak hatefully to someone we love the next?. Or we say we trust God and His will...then we turn around and say we doubt Him. I say "we", because I am assuming that I am not the only imperfect Christian here on earth who can relate . If I am wrong then, God forgive me!

I am writing this hub, because I found myself for so many years, living in the negative. I would pray to God for good things to happen, but expected the worst. Instead of speaking life, I was speaking death. As I was reading my bible, I kept coming back to James chapter about God laying His Word on my heart! In so many ways what we say is what is in our hearts, When we speak negatively out loud, we are bringing the negative into our lives. Likewise; when we speak positively, we are bringing God's will into our lives. For myself, I would definitely want to live my life according to the latter. Gods Word says:

A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart. ~ Luke 6:45

After I meditated on these passages, I asked myself, "Would it be so hard to think and speak positively instead of negatively in every situation in my life?" I really thought it wouldn't be so difficult...until I started this experiment! I found that because I lived with a negative outlook for so long...thinking that my circumstances could not get better, that it was impossible to achieve or that I just wasn't good enough, that I found it hard to stop being negative.

I prayed for God to help me to live an abundant life, TO KNOW THAT ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE WITH GOD!! So I started to dig into His Word, studying scriptures about controlling the tongue and about believing that God wants us to have an abundant life, not a life of disappointments. I then used the scriptures to reinforce what I knew to be the truth of God's Word. I just needed to teach myself a new way of thinking. I knew that I could not do this alone, only with His help could I conquer my old way of thinking. Everyday I wrote down ten reasons why I was thankful, which I thought about through out my day. I also continually thanked God for these things everytime I thought of them. Soon I found that I was thankful for everything in my life. I realized as time went on that my life started change for the better, not because of my luck, but because of my positive attitude on life. I started to believe in myself and to trust God. I was not the only one that saw this, other people saw it too. Soon things changed for the better.

I now believe what I knew in my heart to be true about my life...I am blessed, not because of what I have or who I am or who I know, but because of who my Father is....the King of Kings, "El Shaddai" The God Who Provides. I thank Him everyday, even when I run into difficulties I know there is a reason. I may not know what that reason is, but He does, and His reason is always for good and not evil. I have learned to trust HIm.

Here are the passages I found that helped me:


Psalm 19:14

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer.

Ephesians 4:29

Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.

Matthew 12:37

For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.

Colossians 3:8

But now you must put them all away: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and obscene talk from your mouth.

Mark 11:23

Truly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, ‘Be taken up and thrown into the sea,’ and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that what he says will come to pass, it will be done for him.


Mark 11:22-24 Therefore I say to you, all things for which you pray and ask, believe that you have received them, and they will be granted you.

Isaiah 59:1 Behold, the LORD'S hand is not so short that it cannot save; nor is His ear so dull that it cannot hear.

Isaiah 55:11 So will My word be which goes forth from My mouth; it will not return to Me empty, without accomplishing what I desire, and without succeeding in the matter for which I sent it.

John 15:7 If you abide in Me, and My words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.

2 Corinthians 9:8 God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed.


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