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CMLL Puebla: Mailed In

Updated on February 27, 2017

I’m going to keep this short and to the point; I’m super tired thanks to only getting three hours of sleep the other day (I’m still playing catch up), I’m grumpy and I’m now even further annoyed by tonight’s CMLL show, which was the very definition of the phrase “mailed in.” Hell it’s annoyed me so much that I believe I just used a run on sentence, the cardinal sin of writing. Look what you’ve done to me Paco! Luckily I was reviewing the show as it happened, which means this bad boy is all set to go and I can be up and out of here as sooner than later. Be warned though; the grumpiness, tiredness and nature of this CMLL show may have led to me mailing this one in too. Or as much as I can; my skillz are untouched yo! But enough of my narcissistic ways; Moses, drop that meme yeah, drop that meme. Man I got to lay off the hip hop that I never listen to.

París & Zaeta Roja defeated Rey Apocalipsis & Toro Bill Jr. two falls to one

A better than usual Rey Apocalipsis/Toro Bill match that still wasn’t all that good. I gotta lay the blame on the technicos there. Apocalipsis and Toro Bill may be two more unmotivated luchadors in a long line of unmotivated luchadors, but they were trying here and actually pulled off some pretty cool stuff (including an Apocalipsis Lionsault). So how did París and Zaeta Roja reward them; by working a match that was so Esfinge I’m surprised one of them didn’t pull their mask off to reveal themselves as Esfinge after. I’m cool with basic stuff, but at some point in a match you have to move past that and the technicos didn’t, leading to this becoming three falls of your typical CMLL opener. At least the technicos won I suppose, even if that only leads to Apocalipsis and Toro Bill getting reamed and chewed out by Raziel and Arkángel de la Muerte later. Losing is unacceptable in the Grumpy Old Luchadors club you know.

Millenium & Robin defeated Espíritu Maligno & Policeman two falls to none

I’m still trying to figure out what happened here. This match was fine for the first two falls, with Millenium doing work, Robin doing well save for one near slip up on a crossbody and the rudos staying afloat. Then a funny thing happened; the match ended after two falls with at technico victory AND ended with Maligno and Policeman fighting each other. That’s right; the rudos ended up brawling with each other!

You’ll have to forgive me for the shock here. I’ve seen rudo/heel turns before, but turns in CMLL happen with the frequency of a Chicago Cubs World Series. Why did this happen? No idea. All I know is that one minute Maligno was trying to pull Policeman into the ring, Policeman then snapped at him and suddenly they were slapping the shit out of each other while Millenium and Robin celebrated. I have no idea if this is leading to a match or if this is leading to Maligno or Policeman turning technico, but I can’t deny that this was interesting (more interesting than the match). I’d have maybe preferred this happen with two dudes that actually matter, but hey; any effort anywhere is something right?

Fuego, Oro Jr., Stigma defeated Arkángel de la Muerte, Canelo Casas, Puma two falls to one

It’s happened folks. For the first time…ever, we have witnessed a decent Arkángel de la Muerte match. Sure he had nothing to do with what made this match highly watchable, but his involvement technically means he was involved which technically means he was in a decent match. Hey don’t blame me; I didn’t make the rules. Turns out the best thing to happen to this match was Okumura’s injury, allowing him to be replaced by Puma. I was all prepared to feel bad for Puma being stuck with Arkángel and his Heavy Metal wannabe cousin, but against all odds Puma came in with both a great effort and a really great performance; he was trying his ass off the entire time, raised the game of the technicos and I think even made Canelo and Arkángel a tad bit better. Not enough to make them likable obviously, but they were far easier to digest here than usual. Because of that I can’t really complain. Puma was great, the technicos were all solid, there were actually a few cool dives and best of all the right team won. When it comes to the involvement of Arkángel and Canelo Casas, there’s not much more you can ask for than that.

Ephesto, Hechicero, Mephisto defeated Johnny Idol, Máximo Sexy, Stuka Jr. two falls to one

This was looking really good in the first fall, with all six guys coming out of the gate fast. Then the end of the second fall happened and off the rails we went. For some reason Mephisto and Ephesto just weren’t on tonight. They were trying and they were good early, but it seemed like their timing and rhythm really deteriorated as the match went along, resulting in several sloppy sequences during the second and third fall. It wasn’t enough to harm the match completely and thankfully Hechicero, Stuka, Idol and to a lesser extent Máximo picked things up to a degree. Ultimately though this match didn’t click as well as one would’ve expected. The Arena Puebla effect strikes again.

Lightning Match

Volador Jr. defeated Euforia

This match was like getting a taste of your favorite meal and then watching as someone took it away. That may sound harsh for a match that was pretty good but that’s all this was, and I may be being a tad kind. Part of the problem was the fact that this was a Lightning Match, which pretty much limited Volador and Euforia from doing their greatest hits selection from what would’ve been an exciting third fall. I don’t know though; something just felt missing. They were doing cool stuff and Euforia looked every bit as game as you’d expect, but something about this didn’t click the way I would’ve liked. And the worst part is we won’t get to see it click as Volador ended up beating Euforia clean, with no build up to another match next week or anything. Come on CMLL; you can’t give us a taste and then toss the meal into the garbage! Maybe it’s just as well; I’m fairly convinced Euforia vs. Volador is a money match somewhere down the road. Perhaps Arena Puebla and the restrictions that come with it isn’t the place.

Carístico, Valiente, Rush defeated Gran Guerrero, Niebla Roja, Último Guerrero two falls to one

If ever there was a match that summed up a show, this was it. This actually wasn’t a bad bout by any means; sure it didn’t reinvent the wheel, but Carístico was really good, Valiente was active, Rush had a few moments (despite being in coast mode) and the Guerreros were entertaining as always. The problem was less the match and more what the match was building to; yet another Rush vs. Último Guerrero match.

Correct me if I’m wrong sports fans, but hasn’t that match happened, oh I don’t know, over 9,000 times in the past few months? Every time I look up there appears to be another Rush vs. Último Guerrero match; the only match I see more of is UG vs. Valiente, another bout that’s happened far too many times. Sure it could be worse and all considering Rush and UG are the Rush and UG, and I did enjoy UG once again breaking out the English in the show closing promo to mess with Rush. But come on CMLL; there’s only so many times you can do this match before it’s basically the same thing, especially since Rush is a guy who takes matches off and UG basically does UG every time out these days. Booking this match again is lazy, especially since you could book any other singles match you wanted (like say, I don’t know, a longer, more substantial match between Volador and Euforia?!). I’m sure it’ll be fine come next week and if Rush decides to show up it may even be something worthwhile. That being said, I’m guessing Rush will mail it in, UG will do his routine, the match will merely be okay and I will be back here next week saying the same damn thing I’m saying now. Well hopefully with wittier comments than this time around. Good Grodd does it suck to be tired.

We’re done folks and I am off to bed. See you tomorrow for what will hopefully be a better CMLL show than tonights. Till then, this!

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