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CMLL Puebla: Third Match Thrills

Updated on February 6, 2017

What do you know sports fans; tonight’s CMLL show in Puebla wasn’t a colossal waste of time? Sure it wasn’t the greatest show ever but overall it was a fun show with some intrigue, some good performances, only two noteworthy duds and one really, REALLY good match. Let’s see which was which so I can get back to TEW! Moses, just meme it! Meme it! MEME IT! Meme it!

El Malayo, Fuerza Chicana, Perverso defeated Arkalis, Hijo de Centella Roja, Meyer two falls to one

The good news; all three technicos tried really hard, did some cool stuff and with better opponents may have even been able to pull out a good match. Even Hijo de Centella Roja looked alright, which tells you he needs to be kept away from his father FOREVER if he wants to succeed. The bad news; the rudos were just plain awful. Fuerza Chicana was Fuerza Chicana, Malayo did absolutely nothing and Perverso messed up so many spots it was, well, perverse. They couldn’t have been more putrid if their team name was the Cleveland Browns, and the match fell apart once they got control in the second fall and never recovered. Congrats to you CMLL; with this team you’ve officially made me miss Policeman and Ares on this show. Quite the accomplishment.

Dalys, La Seductora, Zeuxis defeated La Jarochita, La Vaquerita, Marcela two falls to one

Pretty much what you’d expect from this type of match. Zeuxis was terrific as per usual, dishing out knees, kick ass dropkicks and even more kick ass dropkicks. Even when she isn’t doing Spanish Fly’s she still rocks. Dalys and Marcela came off very well here too, and it wouldn’t shock me if Marcela brought a little extra edge after it was announced she was going to Ring of Honor Wrestlemania weekend. Unfortunately the other three weren’t on the same level. Jarochita tried hard, but you can tell she’s still working out the kinks and has a ways to go. The same excuse cannot be used for Vaquerita and Seductora, who were seemingly competing to be the worst luchadora in the history of the universe. At one point they did a headscissors spot in this match that was so bad it simultaneously made Gigli look like a five star movie and made me want the headscissors move to be retired. That bad folks. I think this goes without saying but I’ll say it again; get some better women in there CMLL! You’ve got Zeuxis killing it and two serviceable vets in Dalys and Marcela involved and yet this match breaks down because you’ve got two women in their near forties who apparently can’t do the basics without someone holding their hands still! Time for them to hit the bricks and get someone else in there. What’s Sanely doing, besides breaking hearts across the globe?

Okumura, Puma, Tiger defeated Drone, Esfinge, Soberano Jr. two falls to one

What do you know; the match that looked the best on paper going into the show was the best coming out. In fact I’d say this even surpassed expectations, and you could tell it would the moment Puma and Soberano started out with some of the most beautifully paced back and forth mat work in the history of the western hemisphere. Seriously, I could write sonnets about the work they did there, and it only lasted five minutes. Without question it had to be the best five minutes since the Goku-Frieza battle. And yes, I’m well aware that went longer than five minutes. Damn Frieza, learn to tell the time.

Anyways, this match was sublime. The pace was never anything but great, with everyone moving full speed at all times. Soberano, as expected, was excellent. Tiger and Puma, as expected, were excellent, more so individually than as a team (there weren’t as many double teams as I expected). Drone was spectacular and it seems to me that he and Soberano have a unique chemistry as partners that CMLL needs to explore more. And even thought they didn’t shine as much as the other four did, Okumura and Esfinge didn’t mess anything up and when the time came looked good hitting their spots (big ups to Esfinge for hitting a nice springboard plancha where it looked like he may slip and die). Whatever you want to bring up, from the performances to the spots to the cool multiple submission sequence (everyone put each other in a Triangle Choke while Esfinge put Puma in a Boston Crab) to even the finish where Drone pinned Puma, only it was negated by Tiger pinning Soberano (the technico captain), it all worked. Not only that but it was never not fun, and I’d argue this was the most fun a Puebla match there’s been since Dragón Lee and Pólvora squared off IN NOVEMBER! It’s been a long three months folks. Let’s hope the semi-controversial finish means these six will be going again next week! Outstanding match.

Cavernario, Felino, Mr. Niebla defeated Máximo Sexy, Stuka Jr., Titán two falls to one

The moment it became apparent Mr. Niebla was in for Negro Casas you knew this match’s chances of being great were done like dinner. It still managed to be entertaining for the most part; I don’t know if Niebla was wasted or not like he usually is, but his comedy game was on point and there were several entertaining moments between him and Máximo. Likewise Felino and Zacharias had a few good spots as well; you weren’t hurting for laughs in this one if that’s what you were looking for. The problem was a) this meant Titán, Cavernario and Stuka had nothing to do, b) Stuka ended up hurting himself at the end of the second fall when he hit Niebla with the Stuka Splash and c) he was hurt enough that the third fall ending completely fell apart because of it. Well that and the fact that Pompin is way too old to be refereeing and has the timing of the Ultimate Warrior and Hulk Hogan at Halloween Havoc 98. The ending isn’t a big deal in hindsight considering the match did at least entertain and won’t be remembered as anything more once tomorrow has come. But this could have huge implications for Stuka. Remember, he’s supposed to be facing Rey Bucanero in Arena Mexico less than twenty four hours from now! Can he still go? And what will CMLL do if he can’t? That Stuka Splash (which Stuka has done a thousand times without incident by the by) may have been a big deal when all is said and done, at least as far as this week is concerned.

Diamante Azul, Euforia, Valiente defeated Pierroth, Rush, Volador Jr. two falls to none

There were only three redeemable things about this match. First, Volador (as expected) fit in right alongside Rush as a rudo and made you long for the day CMLL finally wakes up and puts those two together in Los Ingobernables. Second, Diamante Azul’s Nail in the Coffin out of the Gorilla Press position was dope and I don’t care who knows it. And third, there was a brief fifteen second sequence in this match between Volador and Euforia that was so good I thought we had entered another, better match. Suddenly it was just those two in the ring, Volador…hell I can’t even remember what twisty move he was going for but gorramit Euforia reversed it into that backbreaker, followed by Volador recovering, headscissors Euforia out of the ring and hitting that awesome springboard hurricanrana to the floor. Memo to CMLL; can we drop the Diamante-Ingobernables shit and just do Volador-Euforia forever? I’ll do anything.

Sadly that was all there was to this match, which otherwise featured more Diamante-Ingobernables stuff that wasn’t putrid but annoyed you anyway because it seems more and more likely CMLL is going to waste the main event of a big show on this rivalry. Not only that but it appears this will now be playing out across all three streamed shows. ALL THREE! There will soon be no escape for us and we’ll all be driven insane. Well I may be insane already BUT STILL! My hope is that the post match promos from Rush and Diamante are leading to a resolution that will take place next Monday or the Monday after that so we can all move on to whatever glorious plan CMLL may or may not have for Homenaje a Dos Leyendas. Maybe I’m naïve but I cannot fathom that Rush vs. Diamante Azul (which was disastrous not too long ago) or Pierroth vs. Diamante Azul is the match they want to headline the show honoring Villano III on the 17th Anniversary of his all time classic with Atlantis. I can’t see it; I don’t want to see it, and Grodd willing this match and the aftermath is the beginning of the end to this rivalry and not simply the beginning.

That’s game sports fans. I return tomorrow with a new entry in the 201 series (I know, been awhile) and a review of tomorrow’s Tuesday show. Let’s hope Stuka-Rey Bucanero is still on yeah? Till we meet again, DA BUFF!

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