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Lord of the Universe: Return of the CMLL Running Diary

Updated on June 30, 2017

You know what the worst thing about vacations are; they end! I just recently learned that the hard way after my week long trek to Maryland to visit family came and went quicker than Speed Racer at the Gran Prix. I'm still sad about it as we speak. The lone saving grace; I now have some time to write again, just in time for CMLL to kick off their annual Universal Championship tournament several months earlier than usual. And, because it's me, that means it has to be done in a Running Diary format. Be warned though; I may have to abandon ship before the end, as I'm currently on a dog sitting assignment in Barrington that's supposed to be till 11:30. Translation; GET SHIT DONE BEFORE THAT TIME CMLL! Let's see if they do. For now, let's play the Flash Gordon theme and get started. Moses, for Grodd's sake stop unpacking your suitcase and meme. You've only had two days!

9:21: I'm done promoting; all that's left to do is take the dog out before the show and hope the feed works. By the by, in case you're wondering, my pick for the Universal Championship final is Volador Jr. vs. Soberano Jr. Why? Two reasons; because it be the best possible match up, featuring the best luchador alive vs. the guy who will soon be the second best luchador alive and because it would mean I was right and Rob Viper was wrong. That's something worth rooting for folks.


9:23: And now the dog has gone to sleep. So much for taking her out. Now it's down to whether the stream will work.


9:29: LAST MINUTE TO PLAY IN THE PERIOD!


9:30: And we're live! If you want to watch, check out the Facebook link instead of the Claro Sports one. It's the link, the whole link and NOTHING BUT THE LINK! Whoa, what just happened?


9:31: In what may end up being the best opening match in CMLL history, Pegasso, Drone and The Panther take on Sanson, Cuatrero and Forastero. And you thought I was kidding when I said it may be the best opener ever! There's legit nothing about this match that's bad; even Pegasso works within the confines! It's like the opposite of Blake Griffin's new deal with the Clippers. Seriously Doc; 5 years and $173 million?! That makes the deal the Knicks gave Amare look cheap.


9:34: In what may be the smartest move ever, Sanson, Cuatrero and Forastero are wearing shirts with their names on them so we know who is who. FINALLY! Only took months. Sanson and Drone are captains by the way.


9:36: Panther and Cuatrero will start and they'll start on the mat. They eventually work their way to doing chain wrestling on and off the mat, with Cuatrero having a slight edge till they lock up a second time.


9:37: Out go Panther and Cuatrero, in come Sanson and Pegasso, who's look seems to be inspired by Jet Set Radio. Sanson knocks Panther to the floor, so it appears that may be a feud of some sort to look out for.


9:38: Pegasso quickly flusters Sanson, who gets up and takes the technico to the mat with a leg lock. Pegasso gets out and it's back and forth, leading to Sanson knocking both Panther and Drone off the apron! He really wants those dudes gone, huh?


9:39: Drone and Forastero in and the pace immediately picks up. Drone hits a headscissors on Forastero, hits a Tiger Kick and the Hombre Bala knees in quick succession. Panther and Pegasso send Sanson and Cuatrero to the floor, leading to a double team that sees Panther launch Pegasso into Forastero for a hurricanrana roll up. Forastero's cousins recover in time to break it up, send the technicos to the floor and the triple team is on!


9:41: Looks like Forastero tapped Pegasso with an arm bar. The rudos then gang up on Panther, leading to a double backbreaker by Forastero and Sanson, followed by a springboard elbow drop by Cuatrero. 1-0 rudos. Decent, but not a great start. The Marvel Cinematic Universe of first falls as it were.

9:44: You'll be shocked, SHOCKED, to hear the rudos are triple teaming to start fall two. At least it's good triple teaming though! The rudos take out Pegasso, stomp on Panther and have Drone...till he slid out of the ring and started a comeback! That was quick.


9:45: Panther fakes a dive to boos, Pegasso hits a nice hurricanrana off the apron and Panther then proceeds to hit everyone with a backbreaker. He then sets up Cuatrero for a Drone Spanish Fly, which Cuatrero took HARD! Seriously, that looked painful. Meanwhile Panther submits Forastero with Nudo Lagunero and we are tied. Fast and to the point. Another decent fall. Feels there's another gear these guys can hit though.


9:47: Pegasso and...Cuatrero start fall three? Nope, it's Forastero. Even with the shirts I can't tell them apart. In any event, Pegasso rolls up Forastero, Drone and Panther roll up the other two for a triple roll up (!) and everyone kicks out.


9:48: MORE TRIPLE ROLL UPS! And more kick outs. One day that triple roll up will work. I'm telling you.


9:49: Panther hits a great powerslam/Lionsault combon on Forastero, followed by yet another triple roll up scenario. Once more it doesn't work. The rudos take brief control, go for dives, get tripped up and find themselves getting rolled up for a fourth time! Does it work this go around? NOPE! Damn you CMLL.


9:50: Looks like Sanson and Drone are going at it. They have a nice back and forth before Sanson runs Drone into the corner. Sanson eventually finds himself on the top, Drone hits a palm strike, goes up and then nearly gets piledriven by Sanson before Panther is in to break it up. This all leads to the TOWER OF DOOM, with Pegasso hitting a splash on someone. Near falls for all!


9:51: Panther and Cuatrero were alone before Pegasso came in. Cuatrero hits him with Wasteland, then goes up and misses what would've been an awesome splash. Forastero comes in and MY GRODD WHAT A GERMAN SUPLEX ON PEGASSO! That takes care of him, just as Panther gets rid of Cuatrero with an awesome Frog Splash.


9:52: Panther sends Forastero to the floor and hits an awesome Suicide Dive! Down to Sanson and Drone. They find themselves up top and THAT'S A SPINNING POWERBOMB BY SANSON OFF THE TOP! Rudos win. Excellent end to a very good opening match. I liked but didn't love the first two falls, but that third was great. Really good start to the show.


9:56: Time for the undercard to impress again! We've got Guerrero Maya Jr., Rey Cometa and Titan taking on Virus, Polvora and Ripper. Take away Ripper and this match is a winner all around. Hell it may still be anyway; the rest of the guys are so good that Ripper can do his Weekend at Bernie's impression and shit will still work out.

Ripper's the guy in the cart. The guy pulling him is the other five luchadors in this match.
Ripper's the guy in the cart. The guy pulling him is the other five luchadors in this match.

10:01: Ripper is rudo captain. I missed the technico captain as I cut a scab on my leg BRB YO!


10:03: I've returned to see Maya faking out Ripper with a handshake. Clearly I missed a ton!


10:04: Maya and Ripper are finally out, Virus and Titan are in. This could be very good. Or Virus could slack off. Let's hope for the former.


10:05: The good news; Titan and Virus were great together! The bad news; it lasted a minute. In are Polvora and Cometa, which itself could be good.


10:06: Cometa used his speed to get the better of Polvora, sending him to the floor with a hurricanrana. Virus then comes in to kick his head off, and it's rinse, repeat from there till Ripper and Maya are the last two in the ring. They go back and forth till Maya arm drags Ripper to the floor so Titan can hurricanrana him from the apron. In the ring, Maya sets up Polvora for a Cometa splash (which he hits for the pin) while Maya takes out Virus with a springboard back elbow. 1-0 technicos. Okay start.


10:10: Titan and Ripper start fall two with Titan owning Ripper. As it should be. He sends the rudo to the floor, disposes of Polvora and Virus, looks like he's going to moonsault Ripper...and instead dives back in to hurricanrana Polvora to the floor, where he follows up with another hurricanrana on the floor. Good stuff from Titan.


10:11: Guerrero Maya's turn. He owns Ripper, then owns Polvora and Ripper at the same time, then owns Virus with a couple of backbreakers that Virus sells beautifully. Unfortunately the fun ends there as Polvora hits Maya with a dropkick from behind to start the rudo beat down. Poor Cometa didn't even get a turn!


10:12: Really good triple teaming on Cometa leads to his elimination, allowing the rudos to gang up on Maya. They set him up for a Ripper Senton and BOY DID HE CONNECT! That looked like it hurt. In any event Maya is done, we're tied and this has been pretty good.


10:14: Fall three begins with Polvora telling the edecan to go back to the locker room! High comedy. The rudo beat down continues.


10:15: Virus gets a near fall on Maya while Polvora takes it to Titan on the floor. In the ring Ripper and Virus start the double team and floor Maya with a double big boot. Cometa comes in and he doesn't do much better, immediately getting kicked from behind by Virus.


10:16: Double dropkick to the knees by Polvora and Virus! Nice. Maya's now in, and I'm getting the feeling he's the one to start the comeback. That or he's the one to get stomped on repeatedly.


10:17: Virus accidentally ran into Ripper on the apron, Titan's now on the apron and UH OH!

10:18: Titan went crazy hitting a huge Asai Moonsault on Polvora! Meanwhile Cometa and Virus go at it in the ring, trading near falls before Cometa sends the rudo to the floor and hits a nice dive. Maya is now in with Ripper and Polvora, owns both, but then watches as Polvora catches Titan on the top and destroys him with a Polvora Driver! Bye bye Titan. Meanwhile Ripper nails Maya with a senton, but Titan was the captain so it doesn't matter. Rudos win. Another solid match, though not as good as the first. Titan was tremendous in his last performance before Long Beach, while Maya, Cometa, Virus and Polvora were all solid. Probably should've had the technicos win this one though.


10:21: Here comes yet another potentially awesome undercard match. This time we've got the red hot Soberano, Atlantis and Blue Panther taking on the red hot Sam Adonis, Mephisto and Dragon Rojo Jr. Sam and Blue Panther have been reliving the Blue Panther-Art Barr feud recently, so look out for that here.


10:27: Can you believe these entrances took six minutes? Me neither. Mephisto and Atlantis are captains by the by.


10:28: Crowd is white hot because DUH; Sam Adonis is there. He'll have to wait to get in though as Soberano and Dragon Rojo will start in what should be an interesting match up.


10:29: Mephisto in to break up a key hold by Soberano. Hmm. Rojo stays in, locks up with Soberano again and gets put in another submission. This time Sam is in to break it up. I smell Blue Panther booking here!


10:30: Sam waves the flag on the apron as Rojo and Soberano lock up again. Soberano ends up hitting a slingshot snapmare that sends Rojo to the floor, allowing Blue Panther to chase Sam out of the ring when he tries to interfere. The Panther-Love Machine remake is on!


10:31: Panther wants Sam but ends up getting him, Mephisto and Rojo instead. The triple team looks to be on, but instead Rojo takes Atlantis, Mephisto takes Soberano and Sam focuses on Blue Panther. The legend tries to fight back, but Mephisto is in to hold him down and the beat down is on as Rojo takes care of Atlantis.


10:32: Mephisto nails Atlantis with the Devil's Wings, allowing Rojo to make a cover to actually pin Atlantis. That's the best thing that's happened to Rojo since his Boing! commercial! 1-0 rudos after a heated but largely uneventful first fall.


10:34: The rudo beat down continues for fall two, with the rudos even beating up KeMonito! EVIL RUDOS!


10:35: MEPHISTO CRUSHED KEMONITO WITH A SPLASH! BAH GAWD!

10:36: Sam Adonis accidentally kicks his teammates instead of Atlantis and pretty quickly all three technicos are beating him up! Atlantis then chases Sam all the way to the back, giving me the slight hope that Atlantis-Sam is the plan for the Anniversary Show.


10:37: Meanwhile, Soberano hits a great Fosbury Flop on Dragon Rojo while Blue Panther rolls Mephisto in an Oklahoma Roll about ten times before the rudo quits. That was awesome! We're tied and that was an enjoyable fall thanks to a hot crowd.


10:39: Fall three is on...or is it? Okay it is. Rojo and Soberano begin with Soberano hitting a nice dropkick, then turning on the jets.


10:40: Soberano is up and Rojo becomes the next guy to taste the 900! Soberano then hits a kick, but can't go for a dive as Mephisto is in. He chooses to face off with the veteran, who slaps him around to great heat.


10:41: Mephisto turns his back, allowing Soberano to recover and send him to the ramp. Soberano then hurricanran's Mephisto, goes up to the stage and BAH GAWD HE HITS THE 900 OFF THE STAGE AGAIN! Crowd goes nuts, Panther goes nuts; fuck I'm going nuts!


10:43: Atlantis is now in, taking everyone but Sam to Backbreaker City to huge applause. Blue Panther is now in AND SO IS SAM! This could be awesome. They exchange strikes before Sam whips Panther into the corner and misses a body splash. Panther grounds him, then tosses Sam to the floor only for Mephisto to come in for a fight, which leads to a Blue Panther hurricanrana from the second rope!


10:44: Sam is sent to the floor and Blue Panther connects with a suicide dive! Soberano and Rojo go at it before Rojo connects with a low kick for a near fall.


10:45: Rojo now has Soberano set up for the Double Stomp...MISS! Soberano is up, and Rojo is soon caught in the ropes for the Guillotine Moonsault! Soberano finishes him off, Mephisto comes in and MY GRODD WHAT A POWERBOMB BY MEPHISTO! Out goes Soberano, in comes Atlantis for a sweet Monkey Flip, a dropkick and suicide dive! IT'S DOWN TO PANTHER AND SAM!


10:46: Crowd is going APE SHIT! They then stop when Sam nails a Nail in the Coffin and just like that Sam Adonis has given the rudos a win after pinning Blue Panther. HUGE boos from the crowd for that. That was a ton of fun; Soberano was electric as always, Atlantis, Mephisto and Rojo all held their own and the Sam Adonis-Blue Panther stuff is a winner. Not the greatest match from a work rate standpoint necessarily (though the work was strong), but the heat the match had really made this worth while.


10:55: Took the dog out before the next match. Why? Because the next match is Pierroth, Rush and Misterioso against Vangellys, Terrible and Rey Rey Buc to continue the build towards Vangellys-Pierroth. The only thing of note; there's a big dude dressed as a La Sombra wannabe at ring side with Rush and Pierroth. A new Ingobernables member?!


10:56: There's a beat down going on but who cares; WHO WAS THE LA SOMBRA COSPLAYER?!

10:58: Ingobernables and Misterioso had fall one, till one of them was DQ'd for beating up Terrible. Really, who cares; all that's important is that this ends quickly and that we get to find out who the new Sombra is!


11:01: As we all scramble to figure out what is going on, a terrible match continues. Honestly, CMLL introducing a new Sombra may be the best thing that happened to this angle; now we're all scrambling to find out who this is and are too busy to care for the shit show! Great work Paco.


11:04: Terrible legit just did a plancha. Grodd bless him. Meanwhile Pierroth tries to act like Rush, nearly runs into the ref and gets low blowed by Vangellys to give the former TGR a 2-0 victory. All I remember about this match is the new Sombra and Terrible's dive, so overall I consider this a success. Vangellys is now cutting a promo that I'm just going to ignore.


11:06: Now Rush has the mic. I'm intrigued only if he brings up new Sombra. BRING UP NEW SOMBRA RUSH!


11:09: In defense of whatever just happened, the replays show Terrible and Bucanero both hitting good dives. They did at least try; put that with any other angle and people are just fine with that I think. It's just the Pierroth-Vangellys stench that affects it all.


11:11: It's pointless seeding Battle Royal time! Somehow that'll be better than what we just got...or will it considering we're getting some sort of trophy presentation first. I guess this is the Copa Bobby Bonales thing.


11:12: And the winners are...Marcela and Volador Jr.! How about that?


11:15: Finally...thankfully...we've reached the pointless battle royal that will lead to the tournament. Unless a miracle happens, I'm not too hopeful of getting to see this all the way through. DAMMIT ALL!


11:20: We're off. Stuff is happening, blah blah blah, LET'S JUST GET TO THE GORRAM MATCHES ALREADY!


11:21: Valiente is out, followed by Shocker. There's your first match up. Hechicero is next to go, followed by...VOLADOR! We're getting Hechicero vs. Volador!!!


11:22: Angel de Oro is dumped next, leaving Casas, Dragon Lee and Luciferno. Lee dumps Casas, so he's got Oro and Lee has Luciferno. Let's get cracking!


11:24: Valiente vs. Shocker is first. If there's a Grodd, CMLL will keep it short and sweet with Valiente going over. Please note; there's probably not a Grodd.


11:25: Valiente dodges several Shocker attacks before they got to the floor. I'll be honest; I just want this one to be over. Bring us to the interesting matches please!


11:27: This is a whole lot of nothing because poor Shocker can unfortunately do nothing. We're now doing a handshake thing because of that. PLEASE END THIS!


11:28: Shocker sends Valiente into the corner, knees him then takes him to the mat. They get up and exchange chops, followed by Valiente turning up the speed and FINALLY getting stuff going. Shocker then catches him with a Powerbomb, puts his feet on the ropes and...oh Grodd, Shocker just won and I'm starting to get a bad feeling. Really CMLL? Really?


11:30: That shit is done and thankfully Volador vs. Hechicero is next. Let's see what they can do with their five to seven minutes.


11:31: We're off. Lots of taunting to start with Hechicero trying to bring Volador to the mat. He does, they do some chain wrestling and both men trade roll up attempts. Very well done.


11:32: Volador attempts a roll up but Hechicero is quickly out. Volador then turns on the jets, Hechicero quickly tries a roll up and Volador counters with a short arm key lock. Hechicero gets out quickly, but Volador works it to his favor with a ncie headscissors. He then slides Hechicero out and hits an awesome Asai Moonsault!


11:34: Hechicero with a hot shot coming back in and then nails a flying elbow! That's good for a near fall. Both men are back up quick and Hechicero connects again with an awesome Shotgun Dropkick. He goes for a weird roll up, but Volador gets his foot on the ropes in front of the ref, much to Hechi's dismay.


11:35: Volador ducks a Hechicero attack, hits a headscissors, super kick and a backracker! Hechicero is smart enough to roll away though and save himself. Smart.


11:36: Hechicero hits a few elbow, drops Volador then hits another elbow! Only two. It's getting tense. Hechicero connects with some rights, goes for a powerbomb...AND GETS REVERSED INTO A CODE RED! Great spot. Hechicero barely escapes.


11:37: HECHICERO KNEE! VOLADOR SUPER KICK! It's back and forth. Hechicero hits a Wasteland, sets up for standing shooting star...and misses! Volador is now going up top for a moonsault...BLOCKED!


11:38: It could go either way. Hechicero is now going to the top and gets kicked by Volador. Volador is up himself....SUPER RANA! That'll do it; Volador wins a spectacular eight minute sprint. Great match.


11:40: Looks like that's how I'm going out folks. I'll be back in a bit to recap what I missed driving home.


12:25: Nearly an hour later, I've gotten home and missed the rest of the show. And because my luck is worse than that Blake Griffin deal, I missed Volador and Negro Casas tearing the house down, potentially Negro Casas and Dragon Lee tearing the house down and MY GRODD DOESN'T EVERYTHING JUST SUCK?!

That being said, it's hard to complain too much because everything I did see tonight was pretty good. The under card was super strong, Hechicero-Volador was superb; even the Vangellys-Pierroth bullshit was worth it because we got this mysterious La Sombra cosplayer lurking about (and by the by; the actual La Sombra WAS THERE TONIGHT! So it could've been him...probably not but it could've been!). Only Valiente vs. Shocker and the Battle Royal wasn't worth the time, and that's just fine when the rest of the show ruled. Hopefully I'll get to see the parts I missed soon enough. If not, it was a good show anyway and it gets us one step closer to the ultimate prize; Soberano Jr. vs. Volador Jr. IT'S GONNA HAPPEN!!!!!!!!


And scene. I'm out kids, but you'll see me soon. Till then, THIS!

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