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The Return of the CMLL Running Diary!
Let's be real folks; when a CMLL show featuring a Negro Casas singles match falls on the same day as Casas' 57th birthday, a running diary is required. It's like a Knicks joke at a holiday party; there must be at least one or you'll be out of there faster than shit through a goose. So quick, grab that ice cold 7 Up from your fridge and make sure the mozzerella sticks and chicken strips will be all done for show time. We've got a birthday to celebrate dammit! Moses, don't forget the meme like you forgot the gorram party hats. Why do I keep you around?
8:20: Ten minutes till showtime on the East Coast. Why so early; cause I'm always finding myself rushing to promote this bad boy right as the show is starting. Why do that and miss something potentially interesting when I can start early, get the promoting done before the show and then settle in? Sounds like a good strategy for me. While we wait, why don't we do a Negro Casas quiz to test your lucha skillz. Yes I just spelled skills with a z. Fight me.
8:31: Promoting done just in time! WE'RE LIVE, LIVE IN ARENA MEXICO BABAY!
8:33: Have I mentioned how much I love Fantasy coming out to the X-Files theme? It's almost as great as seeing Aly, who is back again!
8:34: STUKITA! He has been freed from Blue Demon Jr.'s Miami Villa again! Don't ask. He and Fantasy are taking on Mercurio and Pequeño Olímpico. Could be good.
8:36: Was just asked if Casas won is his match tonight. Somehow that will prove to be smarter than at least one CMLL booking decision tonight.
8:38: Fantasy and Olímpico already looking better than every mini-estrella not named Astro that I watched last night. And we haven't even gotten to the Spanish Fly or Stukita yet!
8:39: Stukita is now in. How long till Mercurio bites him?
8:41: Mercurio never bit him! Must be waiting for later. Stukita and Olímpico are doing cool shit now before Mercurio interferes. We are now on the road to the comeback meme!
8:42: THERE'S THE BITE!
8:43: If there's a weaker kick than the one Mercurio just gave Fantasy I'd like to see it. That somehow eliminates the technico, and the rudos quickly follow up with a poor double team to eliminate Stukita. 1-0 rudos. That started off well and then got worse once the rudos got control. Looks like Stukita and Fantasy will need their A game to make this work.
8:45: It's a good thing WWE doesn't watch this stream; one look at Aly and she'd be signed by the end of the show.
8:46: This wait for the comeback has me quoting Pink Floyd. WAITING...WAITING...WAITING! At least Mercurio is starting to catch steam.
8:47: One minute later and we're still...WAITING...WAITING!
8:48: THERE IT IS!
8:49: TOP ROPE SPANISH FLY! ROMERO SPECIAL! LOUD NOISES! If that didn't give it away the technicos just tied it up with a Fantasy Spanish Fly and a Stukita Romero Special. Cool way to end a good fall. I made Pink Floyd jokes during it, but the rudos actually got their act together and hit some sweet double teams. There is hope for this yet!
8:51: Someday Stukita and Astro are going to team up and all my shit will be lost. True story.
8:52: Fantasy doing work and all I can think about is him and Valiente forming a tag team called "The Bulk." It has potential methinks.
8:54: Olímpico just PLANTED Fantasy. He follows it with a submission and that's all for the Captain Spanish Fly. Stukita lasts for a moment before Mercurio ENDS him with a Package Piledriver. Rudos win. Good match after the first fall, with both teams working hard. Most importantly though, Demus 3:16 saw that ending and approved wholeheartedly.
8:59: Oro Jr. (out to AC/DC's "TNT), Príncipe Diamante and Robin are next against Cancerbero, Grako and Disturbio. Oof this will be tough. The good news; Oro changing his theme song from that shitty rap song to AC/DC is a great improvement and Diamante looks cool in neon. Hey, if I were going to lose every time for no reason I'd at least try to look cool too. It's science.
9:01: Everytime I see Disturbio, he gets one step closer to looking like this.
9:02: Oro and Grako start. I can already feel Oro's confidence flatlining. Robin and Disturbio are captains for those who care.
9:04: Whole lot of nothing from that exchange. Diamante and Cancerbero will now go at it. I'd say it be interesting to see how Cancerbero does without Raziel around but that would be the biggest lie since the Warren Commission thought up the Magic Bullet Theory.
9:06: Diamante actually gets a good sequence out of Cancerbero. But yeah, who needs to push this guy, amirite?!
9:07: I bet Diamante and Oro just watched that sequence between Robin and Disturbio and wondered why they didn't get to work Disturbio. Can't blame them.
9:08: Rudos have taken complete control. Damn shame I just used the comeback meme; we'll have to wait till the next match to see that again.
9:09: Dear Cancerbero; stop doing double teams without Raziel. You're friend Cult.
9:10: Disturbio knees Robin's head to Juarez and that's fall one. Decent stuff but nothing earth shattering. Hey, I think I just described this show!
9:13: Nothing was happening, till Robin hit a good move and turned the tide.
9:14: HUGE superkick by Disturbio. This leads to a great sequence where Oro hits a wonderful moonsault on Cancerbero to take care of him. Diamante and Robin then hit dives on Grako and we are tied! The Robin dive could've been better and the rudo beat down was lame, but I liked the end stuff with Oro. There is hope is what I'm saying.
9:16: Robin is still the only technico allowed to work with Disturbio. I mean the action is still great but come on man; spread the wealth!
9:17: Diamante still getting a good amount out of Cancerbero. Looks like they're doing short spurts of offense for the technicos followed by a fake out dive.
9:17: Yup. Here comes Oro Jr. and Grako to finish it off.
9:18: Grako did everything wrong there and yet Oro still found a way to make it work to a degree.
9:19: It's "everybody break up a pin or submission" time!
9:20: Diamante got to work with Disturbio! I mean sure he just got his ass kicked, but PROGRESS!
9:21: Never change Disturbio...HOLY BALLS THAT DOOMSDAY DEVICE DROPKICK!
9:22: Diamante is pinned after that and Cancerbero then submits Oro Jr. THE LOSING STREAK CONTINUES! Decent match with some good spots (that last one was tremendous), but you can easily take it or leave it. I'm starting to believe El Hijo del Santo will return to CMLL before Príncipe Diamante wins a match.
9:27: Junior?! IT IS YOU JUNIOR! He's here for his final CMLL match before FantasticaMania, teaming with Stigma and Pegasso to take on Okumura (also FantasticaMania bound), Virus and Forastero. Big ups to Forastero for working through that injury of his.
9:28: Junior and Virus are captains. As long as those two or Junior/Forastero are the main combinations the match should be fine.
9:29: Naturally we're starting off with Stigma-Forastero instead. Way to not listen to me CMLL.
9:31: Whatever's ailing Forastero didn't bother him there. Pegasso and Virus now in. Guess the FantasticaMania guys get to fight each other.
9:33: Biggest reaction to this match thus far was someone walking through the front row in a L.A. Park match. Even when he's not there the Chairman always gets the biggest reaction!
9:34: Virus finally got something out of Pegasso at the end there. Junior and Okumura now in. Chill.
9:35: Junior gets some stuff in for a moment...then the rudos take over with a triple team. This is now the third straight match where it's back and forth to start fall one before the rudos take complete control.
9:37: Okumura tapped Junior with an STF. Fall one to the rudos. How much you want to be the rudos win this one in three falls just like the last two matches? I'll put everything but my Batman bobblehead on the table.
9:39: Okumura getting a lot more mat work in than usual. That's not helping Junior, who tries to turn momentum and instead gets stomped by all three rudos.
9:40: JUNIOR OFFENSE! You know what that means.
9:41: Stigma and Pegasso take out Okumura and Forastero with dives. Junior meanwhile gets Virus in Nudo Laguerno and we are tied! Good end to that fall.
9:43: The power of Virus has suddenly turned Pegasso into Soberano Jr.!
9:44: Forastero and Stigma have an okay sequence. Now time for Junior and Okumura.
9:45: OWN THEM NOOBS JUNIOR!
9:47: Virus actually nailed an off the apron hurricanrana to Junior! Sweet. That's the beginning of the end for the technicos, as Okumura puts down Stigma with a DDT and Forastero plants Pegasso with a powerbomb. Still not sure why the rudos are winning everything but this match was just fine. Virus was great, Junior and Okumura did well despite pacing themselves and, once more, big ups to Forastero. He didn't look hurt at all and worked well with the time he was given.
9:51: First big match of the night folks. Before they ship off to Japan, Dragon Lee, Stuka Jr. and Titan take on Ephesto, Niebla Roja and Hechicero. Might be time to get the "OMG DID YOU SEE THAT?!" memes ready.
9:54: Ephesto and Dragon Lee are captains. That's good. What's not good is that 9,000 year old Pompin is the ref. If anyone's ruining this one it's him.
9:56: HECHICERO AND TITAN WILL START!
9:59: I haven't seen something as beautiful as this since the Casas-Blue Panther exchange from Friday.
10:00: Lee and Roja are now killing it too. They looked to have issues prior to the bell, so keep an eye on that throughout this match.
10:01: Man Stuka doing work right now. He then fakes out Ephesto to draw him into a Titan hurricanrana on the floor! Meanwhile Lee gets the Double Stomp on Hechicero and Stuka hits Moonlight Drive on Roja. Technicos win a good fall one.
10:02: By the way; that was the first time tonight a technico team has won the first fall. CMLL everyone!
10:03: Second fall is starting and I'm just sitting here wondering why the dancer girls look like extras from Fifty Shades of Showgirls. You're gorram right I just combined those two piles of fecal matter.
10:05: If the Titan-Hechicero singles match doesn't happen before the end of 2017 then we have failed this city.
10:06: When Niebla Roja attempts a running hurricanrana and Dragon Lee lands on his feet like it's no big deal.
10:07: Hechicero with the Electric Chair drop on Dragon Lee!
10:09: What is...OH MY! Roja just put Lee down with a top rope pancake from the Tiger Driver position. That's all for Lee and that's all for fall two. It feels like these guys are in cruise control and yet they're still killing it. Amazing.
10:11: Hechicero tossing fools into the stands!
10:12: Hechicero is so cool he's over at the booth chatting it up with Rey Bucanero.
10:12: BRAINBUSTA BY STUKA!
10:13: TIME FOR THE TRIPLE DIVE! I'm not sure who's more excited; me or Bucanero at the booth. CONTROL YOURSELF REY!
10:14: A SECOND STRAIGHT TRIPLE DIVE?!
10:15: A great sequence between Roja and Lee is almost screwed up by Pompin counting out Lee. Of course it is.
10:16: HE'S A CRAZY MAN THAT DRAGON LEE!
10:17: Sadly Lee is too busy celebrating outside to see Ephesto and Hechicero destroy Titan and Stuka. The rudos win; the fourth straight match the rudos have won tonight. I don't get it either. This match was great though, even with the guys taking it easy. Everyone did well, everything was fun; it just worked. Thank Grodd Pompin didn't fuck shit up either (though he tried).
10:20: It's here folks; Maximo Sexy vs. Negro Casas on Casas' 57th birthday. Should be super cool.
10:21: They aren't putting a clock up, so this isn't a Lightning Match. Thank Grodd!
10:23: Maximo messing with Casas to start. Even Edgar wants him to stop, and Edgar is as technico as they come!
10:24: Maximo gets Negro in a half crab and Casas taps. Come on Negro; it's your birthday! Should've gone for the clean sweep. Good start, if quick, and the crowd is already really behind this.
10:25: Is Maximo booing the fans for booing him?! Legend.
10:26: Great exchange of strikes to start this fall. Negro then takes Maximo to the corner and does the foot choke. Haven't seen one of those in eons.
10:26: LA CASITA! SIT ON IT MAXIMO! The GOAT has tied it up after a quick but effective second fall. They'll need something epic to make this third fall great, but if anyone can do it it's these two. Also; I just gave away a quiz answer away! Dammit all.
10:27: Casas working on Maximo's leg to start fall three. Limb work definitely can't hurt this match.
10:29: Casas using a much better STF than Okumura. Somehow he manages to rally the crowd and pull Maximo's hair all while doing this move. THE GOAT!
10:30: Still working the leg. I like this.
10:30: Maximo comeback! He's noticeably limping though.
10:31: Wonderful double clothesline exchanges! They knock each other down and almost get counted out for a draw.
10:33: Maximo goes for the kiss, only Edgar stops it. Damn Edgar, why you gotta play a dude like that?! As Maximo argues, Casas sneaks in and hits a really stiff looking low blow. One small package later and the birthday boy is victorious on his birthday! Not a great match, but very well worked for what they did. I liked the limb work in the third fall, I liked the double clothesline spots and I even liked the end. Give them more time and I think this could've been sublime, but I'll settle for it being good. Though I also wouldn't have minded a Lightning Match if it was going to be this short.
10:34: By the by; that makes the rudos five for five tonight. If you thought the technicos had any shot of winning anything ever again, I'm afraid Dr. Cox has some news for you.
10:37: Volador Jr. Mistico and Atlantis are the technicos last hope as they take on UG, Euforia and Gran Guerrero. Everyone but Gran Guerrero is heading to Japan after this so I wouldn't expect these guys to go full out. Still should be good anyway.
10:39: Mistico and UG are captains.
10:41: The captains are starting off with some cool mat work. We need more of this UG. Drop the checklist, get with the mat twists. Oh Grodd, why did I just say that?
10:43: This mat sequence has already lasted longer than anyone though the match would. And it's still going...or was till Mistico hurricanrana'd UG out of the ring. Euforia and Atlantis are now in because Grodd is good.
10:44: Would you believe it; ANOTHER RUDO TRIPLE TEAM TURNS THE TIDE IN THE FIRST FALL. Seriously, who booked this show and how much weed did they smoke before doing so?
10:45: Gran and Euforia put Mistico and Volador in this super unique, super cool double submission. It was one part camel clutch, one part hybrid abdominal stretch. Both technicos tap and the rudos are one fall away from a clean sweep tonight. Decent fall.
10:46: For the last time tonight!
10:48: Mistico led the charge there with a great hurricanrana and an even better dive, followed by Volador and Atlantis rolling up Euforia and Gran Guerrero to tie it up. Uh oh; could the rudos perfect show go up in flames?!
10:49: The lack of Euforia references in this match just makes me realize that CMLL should be doing so much more with the dude. Guarantee you give him a boatload of singles matches and he shines it up like a new penny.
10:50: Volador and Gran Guerrero did killer work there by the way. UG and Mistico in and they're acting like they're feuding. Did you UG forget that Mistico and Caristico are different dudes?
10:51: Mistico has gone crazy!
10:52: TAKE ME DOWN TO THE BACKBREAKER CITY WHERE THE GRASS IS GREEN AND THE GIRLS ARE PRETTY! DIVES! DIVES! DIVES, FROM ATLANTIS AND VOLADOR!
10:55: Mistico and UG go at it in the ring, UG winds up locking Mistico in his submission and BAH GAWD THEY'VE DONE IT! The Guerreros win and inexplicably complete a night that saw the rudos win every single match. I repeat; EVERY. SINGLE. MATCH! That deserved an all caps. The main event was good and Mistico in particular was terrific, but man...who booked this show?! Whoever it was they should get a crash course on how to book a show with decent finishes. At least the the wrestling was overall decent and Negro Casas' birthday stuff was cool. Beyond that though, this show and it's booking was stranger than Stranger Things.
That's a wrap sports fans. I'm off to go chill, but I'll be back tomorrow to review the next Lucha Underground episode. Till then, SCULLZ AND MULDS! Just trying it on.