Inked, Trimmed and Full o' Metal
Meet Brandon Futterman of Davenport, Iowa (or BFD!, as Brandon is occasionally fond of shouting).
Brandon is — and has been, for the last 7-1/2 years — Manager of the Children’s Shoe Department of Gordman’s Department Store, 3860 Elmore Avenue. Not only that, but Brandon is — and has been, for each of the last 7 years — Employee of the Year at Gordman’s, due to his professional demeanor, high sales volume, impeccable hygiene, excellent customer service responses, and innovations like the ‘Baby Brannock’, a shoe-size calibrator he designed especially for the Infant-to-Toddler age group.
Brandon resides in the remodeled knotty-pine-paneled basement of his parents’ split-level ranch on East 8-1/2 Street near Pershing Avenue, adjacent to the Palmer College of Chiropractic. (Brandon is, in fact, considering developing a ½-credit-hour night course for the College on ‘The Chiropractic of Children’s Feet’.)
Commuting to work each day, six days a week and half a day on Sunday, in his pale blue 1986 Ford Taurus, Brandon arrives with his standard lunch of two egg-salad sandwiches — lovingly made the night before by Mrs. Fiona Futterman, Brandon’s doting Mom — a plum, and a can of Diet Crème Soda Faygo (from which Brandon shakes out all the fizz before drinking).
A guy’s got to rebel somehow, right?
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Comments
- AUTHOR
Still Brandon Futterman of Davenport, Iowa, but with a new alter-ego of SCUGG! (Scary Urban Goth Guy!)
... I wonder who this man really is now after all the 'tattoing', 'inking' and 'heavy metalling' :-)
- AUTHOR
How can he make any of the little kiddies cry, when most of them look even scarier than he does? :D
Too Bad we don't have a shoe sales place like that in Baltimore, I would have been there for my kids' Shoes for sure. But here's a ? for you. Has he ever accidentally made any little kiddies cry? Let's hope he gives out balloons or candy. :D
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