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Men In Lingerie: Is It Wrong For Me To Wear Panties?

Updated on October 21, 2009

Now there's a title that's almost so stupid I wouldn't have written on it if it weren't for the fact that it's sometimes the apparently stupid, simple things in life that trip us up. I also know that many men who want to wear lingerie feel overwhelming senses of guilt about it, even to the point where their self esteem is affected.

If you're struggling with a desire to wear women's panties or other items of women's lingerie and wondering why you're a 'freak', I have some good news for you. Every month, thousands of men come to read these articles, some leave comments, some move on like shadows in the night, but most of them have the same interests as you do - they're men with an interest in women's lingerie. Most of them are straight, and a decent proportion of them are married with children.

Sometimes when we want something that isn't supported by the general media and those around us, we think that there must be something inherently wrong with us. Of course, if we stop to think about things for a few moments, we can soon realize that this is not the case.

If you spend a few hours watching TV, you'll come away with messages like

It's okay for men to sleep around, it's what they do. It's okay for men to be violent, as long as they're beating up the 'bad guy'. No matter how overweight the man is, his partner must be svelte and blonde. (Just my personal tv bugbear there, what on earth is up with that? For some reason when they put sitcoms together it's completely believable that a guy on an average income who hasn't seen his toes in a decade would be married to a woman who looks like she starts each day with a handful of diet pills and a colonic.) Men don't cry. Men are always masculine and manly. They can put up shelves just by looking at them, and not only will they not ask for directions, a real man will wait for nightfall and navigate by the stars.

Men are bombarded with ridiculous masculine stereotypes to the point where they feel guilty if they don't meet them. Women get a little more of a free ride mostly because we've been screaming about equality for the past several decades. We can wear menswear without fear of being called a lesbian, in fact, more often than not, it is regarded as being kind of cute.

Men might not be ready to fight for their own brand of equality yet, but that doesn't mean that its wrong for a man to wear panties or any other item of clothing he feels like putting on. Logically you may know this, but if you're struggling with guilt, it may be time to start living it as a truth. Put those panties on. Notice how you don't immediately become gay. Notice how you are no less of a man. Notice the relief you feel when you work with your own nature instead of fighting against it.

It is okay to be you.

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    • profile image

      Dave 8 years ago

      I love you Hope:) Thanks

    • profile image

      Gunnau 8 years ago from Central Coast NSW Australia

      Hi Hope

      Men may not fight for the equality required to get a bit of variety in our wardrobe because of the view current social circles take.

      I'm all for change and to get rid of the stereotype male image. Once upon a time women wanted men to have a softer feminine site. We dress softer and their all up in arms. AAAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH

    • profile image

      ILoveLingerie 8 years ago

      That's another nice article. Good read!

      And I agree;)

    • profile image

      lingerielover 8 years ago

      Again a very good article. Long years ago when I started wearing womens lingerie there have been some feeling of guilt or question if there was something wrong with me.

      Why shouldn´t a man wear pantyhose or lingerie? Only because it is not socially accepted? I remember when the first men wore small earrings. Lots of people were screaming these guys were gay. Today nobody cares any longer. Times are changing. But it needs someone to make changes happen. The first manufacturers have made pantyhoses for men. So there is a market. Let´s enjoy it.

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      nicintights 8 years ago

      Really love your articles, Hope! Speaking as one of these freaks, well, I'm not straight and don't have kids either, so clearly there's no hope! :)

      But I've reached a stage in life where I don't care what others think, and I know I'm an androgyne, and am quite happy with it all. My other half accepts the way I am, and I can't ask for much more, except for more public acceptance of - let's say - fashion freedom for everyone.

    • profile image

      Wren 8 years ago

      Hope, as always a great job. You have mentioned that most of us are straight with kids, I too fit that mold. My question for you and the rest of the readers: I wonder what percentage of the male population wears womens panties on a "regular" basis. Myself, I only wear panties and have been doing so since my college days. Also, I wonder if there is any correlation between education and wearing panties?

    • profile image

      lingerielover 8 years ago

      Wren, you may never know. Although I think the number is increasing. Have read an article that in England almost 10 % of all man wear womans panties more or less often. I´m not shure about education but would assume that higher educated people might be more open to it.

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      Mike 8 years ago

      Hi Hope, I'm a 20 yr old guy who has started wearing women's clothing, and really, it feels perfectly natural to me. For those of you who are on the fence, think about this: do women think that it's unnatural to wear jeans? Pants were originally considered to be a man's clothing, just like lingerie is considered women's. it DOESN'T MATTER what the "label" says, what matters is how you feel about it, if it feels comfortable to you or not, it doesn't make you less than what you are, it just helps you to come out of your shell. I cross dress, I admit it, and it drives my mother crazy. I don't do it in public all that much, at least, not on the outside, but at home, I wear women's pajamas, socks, and underwear, and feel zero guilt because I feel beautiful in them. I maintain the image of a man on the outside, but on the inside, I am who I am, whether people want to see it or not. It just doesn't matter to me.

      Men, do what feels right. Don't listen to society, because society are the ones that dictate things- and sometimes they get us nowhere. Do what you want, and feel beautiful doing it.

      Merry Christmas everybody!

    • profile image

      lovepanties66 8 years ago

      i love wearing them they make you feel good about yourself.ive been wearing now for 2 years and the wife is cool with it aswell.when i told her about it she said "at least i can help you enjoy it " and with that gave me about ten pairs that she dont wear anymore and ive since bought about 20 paors of my own. they feel great when you are completely shave and keep it all in. respect to the panties!!!!!!!!!!!

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      scantilyclad 8 years ago

      Wren there is a site www.best&worst.com where they have a poll you can vote if you have ever worn or do wear panties and about 75% so far say they do wear or have worn them, i was shocked it is so high, Mike i agree with you and i also wear womens pyjamas, camisoles, pantyhose, sleepers, nighties etc they are SO comfortable, i also wear panties 24/7. It is fine for a female to wear "boy style" undies, if a girlfriend/wife wears their partners shirts long undies etc or a teenage daughter wears dads shirts it is "cute" but if a male wears panties he is automatically "sick" "perverted" or gay, don't judge the person by the clothes

    • profile image

      scantilyclad 8 years ago

      Wren there is a website www.bestandworse.com where someone had a poll asking men if they wore panties and i was shockecd to see roughly 75% answered that they did or had and Mike i agree with you it shouldn't matter what a label say's, it bugs me that if you wear panties you are tageed "gay" sick" or "perverted" look at the person not the clothes, i also love to wear ladies sleepers, camisoles, nighties, pj's etc to bed as they are much more comfy and it's panties 24/7 for me

    • robin48 profile image

      robin48 8 years ago

      I love wearing panties and all womans clothes.

      I am one of the 75%. I also wear dresses in private only.I guess its a part of me now..so I will try to embrace and nurture it cuz rejection has not worked.

    • profile image

      pantie lover 8 years ago

      I love wearing womens panties, even love matching up panties with my wife and sometimes love swaping out panties of the morning. Nothing at all wrong with wearing panties. just get some of these women to enjoy the mens desires to wear panties. Why should men be ashamed, women arent ashamed of wearing mens styles.

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      hangman_1963@yahoo.com 7 years ago

      I have been fighting with this since childhood both the desire and the guilt. I am not gay of this I am certain, women turn me on not men. Yes I do like to wear pretty femenine panties and sleep wear, it just feels right to me when I do but I still feel guilty and like some kind of freak, but Thank you for this great article.

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      JenSsmstrs 7 years ago

      i found this article completely randomly, and i have to chime in. ive worked in the mall for years, and since xmas at victoriassecret. You can trust me on this one, there are lots of men that waer lingerie. most are not open about it (but we can totally tell). others are as open as can be, and ive even helped a husbnad and wife shop tegoether for matching items. i say go for it. the ones that i've seen together with the wife, have always been the happiest customers ive met. so if yur huby likes it, just send him my way, you wont be sorry ;->

    • profile image

      deke 7 years ago

      thank you

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      deep 7 years ago

      That's awsome! Thank you Hope

      , Shadow in the nite!

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      Fairy Mary 7 years ago

      Thanks Hope, awsome article and bang on target. I have been fighting my desire to wear lingerie for years and it hasn't worked. Then I found your hubs and learned it really is okay to be me. Now what I wear is my business though I keep it private because of the small minded, intolerant ones still out there in our society.

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      nickin nylons 7 years ago

      i have been wearing for the past thirty years... i cant help it. i love buying the prettiest of lingerie, it just has too match... i do feel really guilty at times and have often thrown it all away only to find myself buying it all again. Part of me wants everyone to know, the other half, the one i think i should listen to, keeps it hidden... well almost :-)

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      Go Caps 7 years ago

      If anyone were to ask me if I wear panties I would not lie and Yes, I do. No one has asked.

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      None 7 years ago

      Hello. I am 22 years old and I work out side and i was looking for ways to keep my legs warm in this winter and most of the web pages I found sed that tights / pantyhose are a good way to your legs warm in winter. So I got all different tights/pantyhose some sheers and opac to ware when I am in work outside. Some people have sad if you ware tights/pantyhose you are a pufther but I what to be nice and warm when working outside. I know I can get longjohns but where I work they might get ripped and they cost like £3 to £4 pound just for one pair but for £2 to £3 you can get like 5 pairs of tights/pantyhose or more. Is this a bad way of thing and doing to keep warm

    • profile image

      None 7 years ago

      I looked on the Internet to find a way of keeping ware when I am working outside in the winter and most of the websites have sed men whearing tights/pantyhose so I tried a pair and now I can not stop wareing them is this worng.

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