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Shut Up, Men And Put Some Panties On

Updated on March 1, 2010

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We spend a lot of time going back and forth in these articles about whether or not its okay for men to wear lingerie. Obviously the prevailing attitude is that yes, it is fine for men to wear lingerie. Those who disagree occasionally pop up, but for the most part, the only people who really care about men wearing lingerie are the men who wear lingerie themselves. (And their sometimes surprised partners.)

That tells you something in itself. There's undeniably a bit of an echo chamber effect going on here, for the most part, only men who are interested in wearing women's clothing read these articles, or women who already support the practice. Occasionally you'll come across a woman or man who does not agree, but they're howled down as bigots in much the same way people who don't think interracial marriages should be allowed are. Sorry, wrong century, in much the same way that people who don't think gay marriages should be allowed.

So where does that leave you, the man who wants to wear lingerie but yet worries about what will become of him if he does? It leaves you only to shut up and put some panties on. I say that with the utmost affection, not with any anger or rancour. The fact of the matter is, there are many men who wear women's clothing and have wonderful partners who support them and who enjoy their fashion choices to the fullest, sometimes even going so far as to wear the occasional skirt or skort out in public. There are some who are still hiding their proclivities, and others who value whatever marriage they have over their own personal freedom. It's not down to me or us to judge them, but it is up to you, man who wants to wear lingerie, to go out and find your way in the world.

There are kind, soft places to fall. There are plenty of people who support you. There are plenty of women who don't give a rats ass what you wear as long as you don't leave the toilet seat up. If you choose a partner who does not accept you for who you are, then that is a choice you have made.

Never let it be said that life does not offer you choices. There are always choices, but in order to experience them in their fullest, you have to start by making a choice. Of course, dilly dallying about in the borderlands of wanting to wear lingerie but not doing so, is a choice in itself.


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    • Gr8legs profile image

      Gr8legs 8 years ago

      I love to wear lingerie. My last partner tolerated it, but my current partner embraces it & we enjoy it together.

      Hope, I took your advice after reading the article "Why You Should Tell Her You Wear Lingerie?" on our fourth date after I met her. I began by telling her there was something important I needed to tell her about myself, then I told her about the lingerie. Her reaction was "Is that all? I thought you were going to tell me you were seeing other women!"

      I then proceeded to strip down to my undies to show her the black panties, stay-ups & half slip I was wearing. She said she thought it looked kind of sexy and since then I have openly worn whatever I like around her and have never felt so relaxed & comfortable in lingerie before in my life.

      I have also shown her some of your article, Hope, including "Why You Need To Date A Man Who Wears Lingerie" and "Why I Like My Men To Wear Lingerie" and she has said that she agrees with you completely.

      p.s. on the subject of toilet seats, women who complain about men leaving the seat up have obviously never had to sit on a toilet where the previous occupant was a man who was standing whilst using the toilet & left the seat down!

    • profile image

      Sherman 8 years ago

      I jealously envy all you males who have the support and/or acceptance of your female partner. I suppose we who like wearing panties and other lingerie like to also be embraced for our preferences and harmless proclivities. It's very much like being appreciated for our arts, music, food, literature, etc. preferences. I don't expect my wife to like all the blues, rock, classical, jazz music that I like. But I expect her to let me listen to it without either of us having to leave the room. The same goes for foods. She doesn't have to eat spicy dishes, but we can enjoy an evening together over a favorite entre and liquid refreshment. We even prefer different roasts of coffee but enjoy our morning coffee together. Is there an example here? The point is to enjoy diversity of personality without trying to convert someone to a mirror image of the other. The saying 'viva la difference' applies to so much in life. Understanding, tolerance, grace, appreciation, openness and open-mindedness, and being friends will do well in all kinds of relatioinships and partnerships--personal, national and international. Is this too idealistic? I hope not. I believe we too often forget to look at the whole picture and focus on a short-lived surprise which was there all along and only recently come out in the open.

      And by the way, I do have my panties, camisole and half-slip on. It's good.

      Peace everyone.

    • profile image

      Johnny 8 years ago

      Well well written hope. i am a very lucky guy with an exceptional girl who supports me! to all those struggling... its out there!

    • profile image

      Doug 8 years ago

      Let's change the world one panty at a time!

      Seriously, if merchants see a market in feminine clothing for men, they will promote it. Start buying and let the sales people know who it's for.

    • profile image

      Alana Raso 8 years ago


      You said it all here. It's only clothing. If it is thrilling, then enjoy it. But as a man, I say be a man and put on your panty, bra or hoop petticoat if you want. I am very fortunate to have one of those partners you mention in the hub who knows that the silky stuff is better and supports me in wherever my interest lie. As a couple, we love women's fashion and make it a priority for both of us.

    • profile image

      eric east 8 years ago

      Living wanting to wear lingerie as a man but not doing so for fear of how a spouse will react should it be negative, is not a healthy thing....Cultivating an attitude of "Who cares, it's comfortable for me and I like it" is best. A spouse who can not accept an alternative non-mainstream choice is unable to accept you for who you are. Be honest. There is no harm. It's not like your flashing to the world. Underwear is a personal choice...give yourself that gift. Give yourself that freedom. Life is too short!

    • profile image

      sissychuck44 8 years ago

      Great Article, once again, Hope. You are such a gem for being so supportive of us guys who prefer wearing panties and other lingerie.

    • profile image

      dana 8 years ago

      I've been wearing panties for about 3 years now and wonder why I waited so long. My wife tolerates it but we have fun with it too. Most of our panties are different in style and color but when we do laundry and there are black panties involved we "fight" about whose black panties are whose.

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      rman 8 years ago

      Very good point hope. Most people don't want to try anything new, but at times they might be curious. The way I look at it is that, it is a free country and u should do want you want, to a certain extent. I like to enjoy life as much as possible.