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Sometimes A Man Just Wants To Wear A Dress

Updated on October 16, 2009
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Does every man wearing a dress want to be a woman? No. Does every man who yearns for panties also harbor a secret desire to slip into a long evening gown, wig, high heels and gloves and call himself Contessa Stacy? No. Sometimes a man just wants to wear a dress. No more and no less.

Some men simply want the ability to dress exactly how they please without their masculinity being called into question, or their sexuality being doubted, or without people assuming that they are transitioning into being a woman.

There are two distinct types of men who wear women's clothing. There are the men who love being masculine, but simply happen to enjoy the look or feel of clothing which is currently considered feminine, such as skirts, dresses and some kinds of lingerie; and there are the men for whom dressing in women's clothing is an expression of a feminine side, or even a desire to be feminine.

Men who fit into the first category can become irritated when people assume that just because they want to wear a skirt they are wanting to be female. For these men it is simply an issue of fashion freedom, no more and no less. They retain their male name, they do not create female alter egos and they are almost always straight in their orientation. Women who don't understand that men like this exist can become confused when encountering these kinds of men, and may even not believe them when they explain that they have no interest in actually being feminine, they simply want to be able to wear clothing that they like the look of.

The second category is much larger and much more widely publicized in popular culture. Men who fit into the second category run the gamut from guys who occasionally like to dress in panties and feel girly, to men who want to transition into being women. The bulk of men in this category however wear more than a few items of women's clothing and have an interest in all things feminine. They will take on female names and create female alter egos. For these men, the feminine isn't simply a concept expressed in the opposite gender, it is a reality within themselves, a reality they want to express and enjoy.

Because the first category of men can so easily be mistaken for the early stages of the second category, many people are unaware that it even exists. Thereby comes a great deal of frustration and annoyance for men who simply enjoy the feeling and look of some feminine clothing. Take lingerie, for instance. As any women knows, nice lingerie feels nice against the skin. It's a sensual feeling. Men have just as many, if not more sensual receptors floating about in the skin of their panty region, so it makes total sense that they would also enjoy similar clothing as women do. High cut nylon panties are hugely popular among many men for this reason. For some, it is just about feeling feminine, but for others, it is simply about feeling good. This may come as a surprise, but high cut women's styles actually fit men really well and provide a sensation that isn't achievable in traditional male underwear.

Sometimes a pair of panties is a gateway to the world of femininity, and sometimes a pair of panties is just a pair of panties.

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    • profile image

      Stiubhart 

      8 years ago

      knell63 says British men will wear a skirt at the drop of a hat, yes if that are tanked up on booze at a stag night. you don't unfortunately see men wearing skirts or dresses as a matter of course so I can still only wear my skirts around the house or if I wish to do it in public do the full Scottish bit and wear a kilt. Will we ever have the freedom to choose?

    • profile image

      Steve 

      8 years ago

      Doug I am just like you and feel the same exact way you do. Not only am I an air force vet I am also in one of the most manly carrer fields you can be in. Im a fire fighter/emt. I know quite a few women that work in my field some I would consider a tomboy and other are far from it. I have a really hard time wrapping around my mind how it is ok for women to be able to work in the same field as me get very nasty dirty, sweetie, covered in blood and guts at time's. Then at the end of there shift walk into there shower get cleaned up toss on a skirt or dress and leave and go home and never once have there sexuality called into question. No put the shoe on the other foot and a man do that and look out! I think for me when it come's to wearing a skirt, hose and heels onacasion it is my way of saying look I am a guy I work in one of the toughtest carrier fields to work in and I still would like to be able to show my softer side too. I fell all men have a softer side it's just we where brought up to be rough and tough and not show that side. Hope I would like to thank you for some of the great article's you have wrote and I look forward to many more!

    • profile image

      Doug 

      8 years ago

      Let's be honest, there's more to males wearing dresses and skirts than simply comfort, otherwise, why do so many women wear pants or shorts when the want to be comfortable? In my opinion, there's not much difference in comfort between a pair of baggy shorts and a short skirt, however, I love wearing skirts. I think if we are honest, we are each trying to make a statement of some type, whether about society or ourselves, or maybe both. I also think these statements are important and I have a lot of respect for the men, women and dual gendered folk who make them.

      I'd also suggest that there are a lot more than two catagories of men who wear traditionally feminine clothes. I fall into both camps, sometimes looking very obviously like a guy wearing a skirt, and sometimes donning a wig and make up and looking as much like a woman as I can (I can't pass yet). When appearing in male mode, sometimes the only item I bought in the women's department is my skirt, other times I'll wear very effiminate outfits with pants, maybe even carying a purse. I have no problem with my masculinity being called into question even though I, like Dave, am a happily married heterosexual with kids and also a combat veteran.

      I see no reson to threaten people with violence when they respond to our breaking conventions in a fairly predicatable manner. My feeling is, if I am comfortable and confident wearing what I am wearing, then who cares what anyone else thinks. Some people think it is cool, others don't and a lot don't seem to care very much one way or the other. I don't feel like I need to defend or prove anything regarding my masculinity, and my sexuality is strictly between my wife and I. I do happen to also have a significant feminine aspect to my personality, which I like to express, and I'm very comfortable with that.

      I consider myself the mirror image of a Tomboy. A Tomboy can hang out with the boys all day getting dirty and playing rough, and then clean up, get pretty and enjoy being a girl all night. Girls and women who break gender barriers by entering previously male-only pursuits are luaded and encouraged. I want the same freedom for men to be able to move between tough and soft as the mood dictates.

    • Hope Alexander profile imageAUTHOR

      Hope Alexander 

      8 years ago

      Thanks Suzy :) But screw the MSM, they're far too busy digging their own graves.

    • profile image

      Suzy31 

      8 years ago

      I am waiting for the day when the NY Times or Washington post or the View or some other mainstream media outlet gives "legitimacy" to these most intelligent and thoughtful posts. It's going to happen. In the meantime, I will enjoy each and every hub that Hope writes, and be on the ground floor as one of those who can claim her as our own

    • profile image

      iwhcpanties 

      8 years ago

      Hope you are soooo gooood!!!! I especially like the last paragraph about hi-cut panties! I am comfort driven.

    • profile image

      robin48 

      8 years ago

      I like wearing dresses and skirts too feels quite liberating,also sexy and secure. add nylons the right lingerie and heels and I am all girl.

    • Hope Alexander profile imageAUTHOR

      Hope Alexander 

      8 years ago

      Great comment, knell, I am going to write a hub on the Rebecca Riots, they're very interesting!

    • knell63 profile image

      knell63 

      8 years ago from Umbria, Italy

      I would also say there is a third group British men. There is a long history of men dressing up as women, The Rebbecca riots in Wales, the pantomime dame and almost every blokes stag night. British men will don a skirt and pair of heels without a second thought. No idea why but even British male has to try it at least once.

    • profile image

      Fairy Mary 

      8 years ago

      Women express on a daily basis their right to fashion freedom, and wear whatever they like on a daily basis. Men don't because this basic freedom, if expressed, will lead to derision and perhaps even physical assault. It is a sad fact that the freedom to wear whatever you like is still a long way off for men.

    • profile image

      allen 

      8 years ago

      to me a dress is freedom something sometimes sexy and comfortable love the feel of a nice slip under it to why cant men wear them i think they look almost as nice on us too

    • profile image

      Dave 

      8 years ago

      We all have opinions. I've heard they are like elbows . . .

      The CD label is a huge turn-off to the macho guys (your first group) such as myself who might hurt someone if they were to be judged as effeminate. No woman today is labelled as a CD even if she NEVER wears a skirt or a dress. What does it take for men to reach the same status in today's society? I married my best friend, a 100% loving biological woman. To my way of thinking, a traditional marriage needs only one woman & one womanly perspective. Although I wear the skirts in the family & my wife owns & wears all of the pants in the family, I am not anything less than a combat-trained killer (remember Viet Nam) who should never be mistaken for anything less than as manly as one can get. Even in my skirts. How's that for a soft feminine side?

      Pants aren't masculine anymore, not with at least 98% of women wearing them on a daily basis. Should we label virtually every woman as a CD today? So why are skirts & dresses labeled as items of women's clothing when virtually every woman doesn't wear them? Personally I have two daughters & a wife, all the soft, 100% biological females, who wear pants. Pants. Jeans (they are pants too). Haven't skirts & dresses been abandoned by females? Hasn't even Hope Alexander abandoned them too? Just guessing, Hope.

      All us manly types want is the ability to have an equal right of choice. We insist that we won't wear high heeled shoes for the same reason that we want to wear skirts. Comfort. What is the most miserable thing that a modern woman might wear to the office? Heels. The first thing that is removed when the lady leaves the office. Sometimes even before the walk to the bus. Yes, the macho guys want the right to wear heels but insist upon the right not to wear them even more so. No bras. No high heels. Give us comfort.

      So a manly man in a skirt isn't anymore of a CD than a woman in pants. Get your head into the 21st Century. Women's clothes are what women wear. It's rarely skirts or dresses anymore. So forget about calling me a transvestite. Someone did that once. Quickly changed their mind. Within the same minute. Amazing how that happens.

      Summary: You might not want to confuse me with a woman. I'm not beautiful. And don't call me Nancy or Susan either.

    • profile image

      Gunnau 

      8 years ago from Central Coast NSW Australia

      I know just how comfy a dress or slip and even my kaftan is.

      It's nice to ditch the trousers and shorts and have a a bit more freedom in the places it counts most.

      I don't know if it's worth mentioning , but the research done on CD's suggested most are straight, married and with kids. The only issue is weather or not that wife and family will understand the desire we seek in what is just a change of clothes.

    • profile image

      Litmusslane 

      8 years ago

      Thanks for the article. I believe I am in the first category. I do not wish to adopt any feminine persona, I don't wear wigs, make-up or female shoes, but I do like to wear lingerie and skirts.

      I tend to look at people - men and women - and if they are wearing something that looks good to me, then I try to recreate for myself e.g. opaque tights and shorts. I believe this is probably the way women probably decide to wear "male" clothes. Not because they are masculine, but just because they like the look.

      I wish there were more of us in category one & maybe more men would feel less intimidated in wearing what they want in public

      Thanks Hope

    • kfsteve391 profile image

      kfsteve391 

      8 years ago from Mesa, Arizona

      I may fall in between the two groups. I love how beautiful women look in their panties and high heels. I want to look just like they do, so I wear the same thing. Suddenly, I feel so sexy knowing that I am wearing the same thing women wear.

    • profile image

      sneakorocksolid 

      8 years ago

      Ok. I think.

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