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28 Hilarious Facebook Statuses About...Facebook

Updated on August 24, 2011

If you haven't lived under a rock for the past for years, you know that Facebook is a big deal. With more than 70 languages available, there are over 750 million members actively using the site. Everyday, millions of statuses and pictures are uploaded. Facebook has been credited to destroying marriages, affect youth voting rates, and help businesses. But even with all those feats under its belt, people love poking fun at it(no pun intended).

So here are 28 statuses all about your favorite website and mine: Facebook.


Facebook Statuses

  1. Facebook: My favorite soap opera.
  2. Facebook is just like your refridgerator. You constantly check it to see if something new appears.
  3. It's weird how Facebook can bring people together! You get a friend request and think, "I hate this person!", but click accept.
  4. If Facebook was a job I'd be a millionaire by now!
  5. What's on my mind, you ask? Well Facebook, I would tell you but you're terrible at keeping secrets!
  6. Why do people get mad when everyone knows their business, but then post everything on Facebook?
  7. Facebook is the only place where it's acceptable to talk to a wall.
  8. I'm afraid of being poked on Facebook. I never know where on my body that person has poked me.
  9. Facebook really needs to change its name to Complainbook, Whinerbook, Woaw-Is-Me-book, and I-Hate-My-Life-But-Am-Too-Lazy-To-Do-Anything-About-It-book.
  10. I find it funny when people have over 1,000 Facebook friends. Just because you saw someone ahead of you on the line in Walmart doesn't mean you have to add them!
  11. Facebook: where you can write on walls, create fake farms, cities and pets and start drama. It's like kindergarden and high school all in one!
  12. Instead of a "Poke" button, there should be a "Slap" button on Facebook.
  13. Facebook is the only place where your enemy can also be your friend.
  14. My parents just told me that I spend too much time on Facebook and should go outside. Good thing I have Wifi!
  15. When I see an argument on Facebook, I keep on refreshing the page and think, "This is going to be good!"
  16. Don't you find it funny when people aren't friends in real life are friends on Facebook.
  17. Of course I post everything on my Facebook status! My stalkers would be lost without knowing where I am and what I'm doing at all times.
  18. I am currently unavailable now due to the fact that I found something to do besides Facebook. I know, I'm as shocked as you are!
  19. Liking your own Facebook status is like giving yourself a high-five in public.
  20. Facebook. It has "book" in it so I'm technically studying.
  21. If you're going to flip out on Facebook, don't delete it the next day! Some of us still want to share it with our friends.
  22. Facebook would make the perfect boyfriend. It always asks what's on your mind, it's never busy and you can shut it off whenever you want.
  23. If I had as much money in real life as I did on my Facebook apps, I could have retired by now!
  24. If you send more ONE MORE Facebook game imvite, I swear I will give you Anthrax.
  25. I'm trying to figure out why I'm still on Facebook. No new notifications or messages, so why am I still on?
  26. My name is ________ and I'm a Facebookaholic. My last post was three seconds ago.
  27. Some people complain about the drama on Facebook, but I don't. How can I complain about free entertainment?
  28. Why does Facebook give me the option to like my own status? Of course I like my own status! I'm sexy and freakin' hilarious.


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    • facts25 profile image

      facts25 4 years ago

      This is very good collection of funny facebook statuses. I have seen some good statuses also on

    • profile image

      Chewy Mommy 4 years ago

      I wish I could vote this up twice. Thanks for sharing these funny and true status updates. I may have to share this on personal facebook page ;-)

    • lucybell21 profile image

      Bonny OBrien 4 years ago from Troy, N.Y.

      OMG, yes I did type this lol. Anyway a really great hub!! I was really laughing and really so agreeing with it. I am going to like this hub on facebook, and I gave you Thumbs up, useful m funny & interesting!

    • SlyMJ profile image

      SlyMJ 5 years ago

      My favourite - because I wish I dared use it on FB - is "If you send more ONE MORE Facebook game imvite, I swear I will give you Anthrax".

    • thranax profile image

      Andrew 5 years ago from Rep Boston MA

      Some are pretty funny there! This one is my favorite:

      Facebook is like jail. You sit around, waste time, have a profile picture, write on walls and get poked by guys you don't really know.