Computer Virus: Don't Panic, Beat It At It's Own Game! I Did! And I Am Computer Stupid!
We all know that horrible sinking feeling when we go to turn on the computer and it starts sluggishly, and sometimes makes a horrible grumbling sound. Our hearts sink and we straight away think to ourselves, Computer virus. The relief when we manage to get it up and running properly without any mishaps is a feeling we all share. But what happens when it does go wrong? There are so many Computer Viruses out there that I won't bore you with all the different names of them. If you have any Spyware or Internet Security, you will know the names of these little evil bugs, as your computer will tell you which ones are trying to attack your hard drive right now. What I will say is that sometimes they are so subtle the little darlings manage to ruin everything before you can say boo! There is not a lot that you can do about those until you are aware of them, but what about the big loud, look at me I am so clever ones? you know the ones that I mean. You turn on your PC and you crash straight away. When you eventually get into your computer you start getting pop up after pop up saying buy this Spyware, etc. So I will just tell you my story, and hopefully it will help you.
Now I know that I am a genius, who isn't? Hum, well, I think so anyway! But the one thing that I have no idea about is the background of my computer. What I mean by background, is anything to do with how it works, the behind the scenes if you like. I can turn on, write, switch from one screen to another, and even add photos, but I have no idea of the workings of the darn things. I was never taught, and I have no yearning to learn. But sometimes a bit of knowledge can be a magnificent thing. I suggest that on a good working computer day, take a few minutes to go through all your icons on your desktop. Look for things like, Take Back To Factory Settings, etc. It does help in a crisis. I have in fact done exactly that when my computer went wrong. It takes about an hour and you have to save your work if it is stored on the PC, but it really does help. It asks you what date you want to take it back too. This is great if you don't necessarily have a Computer Virus, but just the computer decides to give up the Ghost so to speak. But back to the Computer Virus and my near nervous breakdown.
Be Careful of Popups
Popups! Lovely little things. Just as you are reading something really interesting, a pop up will, well, pop up and drive you to insanity. These can be annoying, or even sometimes funny, but believe me when I say, they can be dangerous. In fact very dangerous, these are the darn things that bring the virus straight to your PC. On this day in particular, I turned on my PC and to my horror, I kept getting pop up messages flashing before my eyes. I would close one, and then another would pop up. These were all saying the same thing, or something just as annoying:
YOUR PC IS IN DANGER OF A VIRUS, PLEASE BUY BLAH BLAH SPYWARE NOW!
Obviously there is no such thing as blah blah spyware, but I aint taking any chances with a real one spotting this hub and legging it my way! The more that I tried to get it to stop, the more damage it done.
Nothing Works! Help!
After the pop ups came thick and fast, another great little happening, well, happened. I had numerous Google pages suddenly appear. You know the one I mean. When you first sign in you go and click onto the Internet, and the Google page comes up. This happened over and over without me touching anything! Pop ups, Google pages, flashing screen, and so on. Whatever I did didn't work. I even tried taking it back to Factory Settings, but it wouldn't let me in anything. I started to panic and could feel a very expensive computer mending coming on. Oh great, I thought, no computer for weeks. Whoopy bloody da!
Crafty, But I am Craftier!
So I did the best thing. I turned it of and thought about it. I really must reiterate how important this is. The computer virus is designed to make you panic. When you panic you do all sorts of strange and wonderful things to try to mend it. All you succeed in doing is tying yourself up in a bigger computer virus knot. So turn it off and think!
What was I doing wrong? I had tried Factory Settings. Zilch. It wouldn't let me in to do it. I tried downloading a spyware or new internet security. Zilch. It wouldn't let me in. I was fighting the bloody thing. I felt like it was a living Thing from the planet Zarg, and I held the short sword.
Then it came to me! Ha Ha
The Light Suddenly Dawns On Me!
If you can't beat it, let it win! Now I know that this sounds stupid, but let me explain. The Computer Virus wanted me to buy a Spyware. It was trying to get me to panic to such an extent that I would say YES! I WILL HAVE IT GODDAMN IT!
The page that it was trying to get me to was called, and this is made up so I don't get the nasty thing chasing me again, it is an example. Virus Spy Bloop! buy it now and save 40 percent off, it covers all your needs!
The scary thing is that it looks just like a really genuine Spyware site. It is even clever enough to add another site so that if you just key in the words in the search box it will come up independently, so that you think it is genuine. It is not. Never trust it, only buy the one that you know is genuine.
So what did I do? Right here we go!
1. I clicked on the accept button. This I did at least three times as it made sure that I was desperate! It's clever enough to know that if you get in on the first click, you will either not believe that it was that simple and then get suspicious, or if you click it once, you can then go on to ignore it. Clever eh?
2. After accepting it, it stopped flashing and popping, stupid thing! and let me read the so called 'real' deal page.
3. At this stage it asks for your money. DO NOT GIVE IT YOUR BANK DETAILS OR SAY YES, STAY ON THIS PAGE FOR A SECOND.
4. Go to your search box at the top of your page. The usual Google one.
5. Then type in the exact name that is on the false spyware page in front of you. MAKE SURE IT IS EXACT, AS IF YOU MAKE ONE SPELLING MISTAKE IT WILL KNOW THAT YOU ARE TRYING TO CHEAT IT. BE CAREFUL!
6. When you have written it in, click search. The virus will recognise your words and leave you alone to browse it's false name!
7. When you have reached the Google pages with this name, don't be surprised to find hundreds of sites saying, WE CAN STOP THIS VIRUS FOR YOU, CLICK HERE! Fantastic!
8. Now this is up to you, go down and find the one that you trust the most, and even more important read them all through to make sure it will work first time for you, otherwise the virus will catch onto what you are doing!
9. Choose a site that will give you the spyware for nothing! Free, Zilch! There are plenty of them. Click on it and follow the instructions.
10. And finally, and I think this is the most important, well it was for me anyway, go to the Wiki site! You know the one I mean, Wiki always has a page for everything, the online dictionary sort of thing. The reason? You just know it will be genuine! Aha!
This is what I did, and it was brilliant. I read what the Wiki page said, and to my delight, found that it had added the best and free spyware on it!
I followed the instructions, easy peasy, and VOILA', The virus disappeared!
Am I a Genius or what? No, I know. Took me long enough! Ha ha
Anyway, there you have it, the dummies, me, guide of how to get rid of the Computer Virus!
Give it a go, it will save you money and also give you the best feeling because you beat the little bleep!
This is what happened to me, not all Computer Viruses are the same, so if this doesn't work, please do not virtual strangle me! I am just giving you one good way of getting rid of them. Hopefully it will work on all the 'in your face' Viruses!
If you like mysteries, psychic phenomena, true stories, or just a good laugh, please feel free to click on my profile page, the link is below, it would be great to see you.
- Nell Rose on HubPages
I live in Buckinghamshire, and have been writing for about twenty years. I had a couple of shorts stories published and a poem accepted for an...