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I'd like feedback on my Hub: Five Secrets to Get Your Dream Job

  1. waves001 profile image61
    waves001posted 3 months ago

    Hi Hubbers,

    I'd like some help with passing the Quality Assessment Process. Will you please give feedback on my Hub Five Secrets to Get Your Dream Job (must be signed in to view). What can I do to improve? Thanks!

    1. theraggededge profile image94
      theraggededgeposted 3 months ago in reply to this

      Hi Waves,

      Hate to break it to you but those aren't secrets, they are commonsense smile

      Your written English needs some work as the phrasing and structure of your sentences are not quite right. For example, you say "Know your right address." That means to know where you live, your actual home address. You really mean "Know where you want to be" or "Know what work you want to do".

      Secrets #1 and #2 seem to be saying the same thing, i.e. clarify your goals.

      The fourth 'secret' is confusing. The job applicant should 'sell themselves to the employer' or 'sell their self as the solution'.

      While metaphors like restaurants, cooking, swimming a boarding buses are useful, be careful not to overdo them. Your readers are not stupid, so they don't need it spelled out to them as though they were children.

      You should add a source for your images and also make sure they are legal to use.

      Hope that helps.

      1. waves001 profile image61
        waves001posted 2 months ago in reply to this

        theraggededge thanks for your suggestion as English is not my first language but i will defiantly take care your valuable suggestions.

  2. julieann26 profile image81
    julieann26posted 3 months ago

    One problem I saw is your number 4 point "Sale the Solution" should be "Sell the Solution".

    Also, do you have any evidence that your five points work? You ensure that it does but you haven't proved it by giving an example of someone who has applied your techniques.

    Check your grammar as well as some sentences don't make sense, is missing the correct punctuation, is missing some words entirely.  Some titles lack capitalisation, while some words are capitalise when they shouldn't be.

    1. waves001 profile image61
      waves001posted 2 months ago in reply to this

      thanks julieann i will see to that

  3. 60
    Liisa Bposted 2 months ago

    Basically your grammar. I would suggest copying your written page into Word by Microsoft or Google something like "Fix my grammar" and you will surly find APPS or web pages that will find mistakes that also may offer suggestions. I understand this isn't the time to review ENG 101 so this suggestion may be quick help.
    Also, when you have time just review what were your mistakes and review , find reasons to help improving your grammar. Maybe even get a simple English geammer book for English as Second Language which will help improve your downfalls.
    I can empathise your struggles because English is my second language and at 39 I'm finally seeing how my geammer can be written in another context by changing positions of my words. I'm sure this will be a lifelong struggle. Plus I think teachers overlooked my struggles in grade school, there for I still struggle even after getting a degree in Nursing.
    Other than that I can't pinpoint other areas that need improvement until the grammar gets fixed, then other areas can be seen .
    Good luck.
    PS. Im only assuming English is your second language.

  4. waves001 profile image61
    waves001posted 2 months ago

    thanks you are right English is my 2nd language. i will follow your suggestions and thanks once again liisa keep in touch.

 
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