How to Deal or Cope With Failure

We all fail at something at some point in our lives. We may fail to make the grade at school, may lose a job, may lose the love of our life, among other things. As you have success, you have failure. They are two sides of the same coin. You can't have one without the other, even though you wish you experience only successes and no failures. Failure is a fact of life. It is always lurking just around the corner and you have no choice but to learn to deal with failure, if you are to be successful. So, how does one deal with failure? Here are some ways you can deal with failure and turn your failure into a success.

Don't Brood Over the Causes:

A lot of people can't help themselves from dwelling over the reasons for their failure. While it is important to learn from mistakes you've committed that may have contributed to the failure, dwelling on it excessively can be mentally exhausting. Doing so will just make you more miserable. Instead, make a few points of the reasons for your failure and resolve to learn from them and avoid repeating them.

Don't Go Into a Shell:

Another classic pattern found among people who've experienced failure is the tendency to go into a shell. This is understandable but not desirable or healthy. When you cut yourself off from friends and family and cocoon yourself in your own little shell, all you do is to magnify many times over the failure you've suffered. When you are alone and don't share your feelings, you feel the burden of failure weighing on you more. Instead, keep the channel of communication open. Don't cut yourself off from the world. Yes, you failed, but remember it is just a failure and not the end of the world!!

Think Of Your Past Successes:

When your failure has you down and depressed, the best way to lift your spirits is to think back to the times when you were successful and achieved success. Apart from making you feel better, it might also help you rediscover some of the things that led to your past successes.

Think of Your Past Failures:

This might seem like a stupid suggestion. However, thinking about your past failures might help bring back memories of how you coped then and how you turned that failure into a success. Also, think about the many successful moments you had between your past failure and your present one. It would help motivate you to get out of your present failure.

Know That Failure Is Good Too:

You many not normally look upon failure as a good thing, but it is!! Of course, you don't wish failure upon you, but if you do fail, there are just so many things that you can learn from it. Failures always teaches a person valuable life lessons. It prepares you better and makes you a more complete person. If you look back at your many failures, you would realize that had some of those failures not happened to you, many of the good things that subsequently happened wouldn't have happened either. It is surprising that the thing that you thought at the time as the worst thing to have happened to you, turns up becoming the best thing to have happened to you.

Have Faith in You:

Believe in yourself, despite your failure. Know your capabilities and have belief in them. Don't doubt yourself. Don't trash talk yourself into believing that you are no good because of your failure. Instead, keep the faith. Know what you are capable of and know that one failure doesn't change your inherent strengths.

Plan for the Road Ahead:

Failure does not mean you sit back and relax or waste your time. Failure offers you a break to reassess your priorities and your goals. Make a plan of how you hope to overcome your failure and reach your goals and set about following that plan diligently. Never give up hope!!

Copyright © Shil1978® 2013 - All Rights Reserved


Mystique1957 profile image

Mystique1957 7 years ago from Caracas-Venezuela

I love hubs like these. They leave you thinking and saying to yourself: "Yes! Why didn`t I think of that, mm?" I love intelligence in a lady! Good writing, Shil1978. May the universe grant you more opportunities to keep up your success!



Shil1978 profile image

Shil1978 7 years ago Author

Thanks Mystique for the kind words of praise and encouragement, you've made my day :)

fastfreta profile image

fastfreta 6 years ago from Southern California

Shil1978 another good hub. I like that, "Don't trash talk yourself into believing that you are no good because of your failure." Good way to put it. Watch out I might just use that one. (Smile). Looking forward to reading more.

Shil1978 profile image

Shil1978 6 years ago Author

Thanks, FF, for your encouraging words again. You are most welcome to use that phrase :)

DavePrice profile image

DavePrice 6 years ago from Sugar Grove, Ill

You put the whole idea together very well. I'ld like to see you write more on this subject.

Shil1978 profile image

Shil1978 6 years ago Author

Thank you, Dave, for stopping by and commenting. I hope to write more on this subject in the future, though can't say when at the moment!!

6 years ago

I have never failed. I have had learning experiences and I never regretted anything that I learned. Although it may have been perceived to others as a "failure" of mine, I do not get discouraged by learning experiences. I learn from them. It is so easy to think you understand something that you will never understand.

Shil1978 profile image

Shil1978 6 years ago Author

Hi "u" - thank you for stopping by and commenting. I loved the way you put it. Yes, one can look at things that way too!! Whether one calls it "failure" or not, what is important is that one learns from it, as you say!!

MRWED 6 years ago

I love this hub. When we are in the midst of success our one leg is in the pit of failure. Failures and success are just like eating “durian” you might get hurt by its thorns but after getting hurt you will taste the sweet seed inside. It is really hard to deal with failures but if we treat it as a door to success, I am sure we will be happy opening it even if it’s hard and painful.

ayoub ch 6 years ago

failure is not my option on my dictionary! i live only on the perfection!

charishmay saldon 5 years ago

thanks for posting this....this really helps people to cope and understand more of the things they're going through..thanks muchhh...

Mindful 5 years ago

Failure, what a nice word ;)

Jahanzaib 5 years ago

It shows you the true face of friends and family and makes you think how disgusting and fickle this life and its variables are. I lost $200 Million dollars business in one month and now they say I'm a loser. I wait! I wait patiently till I'm back ten folds and I know I will.... but I'm disgusted...

Shil1978 profile image

Shil1978 5 years ago Author

Jahanzaib, you would most definitely recover all your losses. You are not the loser - the ones who call you that word are the real losers!! Such friends aren't worth it and failure does show them up real quick. You'd be much better off without them!!

glimmer 4 years ago

I am just a student but this hub is so well written, it actually inspires me! As a student, failure is common. In academics, social life or whatever and overcoming them is not so easy. This really helps getting a clearer idea :')

Shil1978 profile image

Shil1978 4 years ago Author

Hi 'glimmer,' just remember that failure is the tuition you pay for success. Things may seem difficult when you fail at something, but that is not the end-all. If you stick at it and be patient, you'd be rewarded with success eventually. You just have to believe in yourself and not lose hope!

Am glad this hub inspires you. When I hear such feedback, it inspires me as well to write more such hubs! Thanks for stopping by and commenting and best of luck with your future - am sure you have a bright future ahead of you :)

kunal 4 years ago

really nice one..wud lik to read more

m.b1371 4 years ago

thank u for your good article...this was my first visit to this site...thank u again

Shil1978 profile image

Shil1978 4 years ago Author

You are welcome, MB1371 - glad you liked it! Thanks for stopping by and commenting!!

Juna 4 years ago

I recently failed completely. I spent many days and weeks preparing an important presentation. When I finally gave it for a rather large group, it was obvious they didn't like it. They had expected something quite different and I didn't live up to those expectations. It was really crushing to realize that they were disappointed. The result was that the class I was offering was canceled. However, I was offered another opportunity elsewhere.

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