Perspectives: Knowing Your True Self ~ The Emperor's Old Clothes

For an introduction to premise and intent behind the 'Perspectives:' series visit the link provided below, and to enjoy the other perspectives by my fellow contributors visit the links listed at the end of this hub ~

Getting Into Your Own Head

Considering your 'self', within yourself, I mean contemplating and examining who you are and what you are like as a self-contained exercise inside your own head, is a tricky bit of business. The whole concept behind this whole 'Perspectives' series is to benefit from not just seeing your own view and understanding of things, but to look beyond your personal perspective and to be informed by the perspectives of others. But the counter-culture movement of my generation, the 60's babyboomers, coined phrases like 'finding yourself' and 'getting into your own head' in their effort to escape the socially ordained course our culture and the previous generations dictated we must follow. On a number of the issues the hippie culture confronted, we owned a keen and vigorous apprehension of a number of the ills and wrongs we found ourselves in the midst of, but the solutions, or better way, we suggested were often ill-informed, fanciful, or just self-indulgent.

The generation that preceded us looked at our interest for self-realization, to 'find ourselves', as little more than an ambiguous lack of productive effort toward anything genuinely useful, a needlessly concocted mystery. These people were a generation closer to the pioneer sensibility, their grandparents and/or great grandparents stepped away from safety to mark-out their spot in the world, and they themselves struggled through the Great Depression and witnessed the unspeakable horrors of World War II defending the principles their nation esteemed and were built on. To them, pulling at your bottom lip as you tilted your head upward to 'find yourself' was nothing but ludicrous - they 'found themselves' in the hard work of living the lives they were dealt.

But that was kind of the point . . . the lives we were dealt (the young White hippies of the 60s) were simply not that hard, we weren't tested in a manner that demonstrated to us who we were and what we were like. We had sort of a puzzle before us of discovering our real 'self' in an, almost recreationally contemplative manner - we didn't have much objective experience to observe and make deductions from as to what we might be capable of, what we really wanted out of life, how we might participate and contribute to a collective good, etc. We kind of had to simply go into our own head and attempt to 'find' who we really were and what we were really like.

Now, the times were indeed tumultuous and many people were confronted by terrible hardships, but for the most part, in the White hippie counter-culture, we were observers and/or peripheral participants in the real hardships and hurt of our time. However, that has it's own, powerful, impact - we weren't discriminated against because of the color of our skin but we had to choose sides, we weren't being shot at in a foreign land but we had to choose sides, etc . . . there were all kinds of rigorous and consequential battles that came to our very doorstep, and we were called on to determine what we stood for and what we stood against. Our times, our experience, our generational disposition placed our struggle to 'find ourselves', not in our deeds and accomplishments, but in our head and our hearts.



The Suicide Of 'Self'

When I was 10 I lived on an all-White block in a northeastern city, everything east of 18th Street was White and everything west of 18th Street was Black. When I brought a Black friend home from school half the neighborhood was on our front porch demanding that we get that little "ni _ _ er" off their block - we had to look within ourselves a determine who we wanted to be and what we wanted to be like. When I was 17 my mom was beginning to make plans to send me off to Canada to avoid the Viet Nam War - I had to look within myself a determine who I wanted to be and what I wanted to be like. Every generation and every individual has the world that they live in, the issues that they face, the hurt and the joy that is specifically theirs . . . certainly my White neighbors telling White me that my Black friend was not welcome in their neighborhood was not as direct or heavy a burden as my Black friend hearing that he was not welcome, and certainly running off to Canada was not nearly as dangerous and horrifying as being shipped-out to Viet Nam - but everyone's experience is their experience, everyone can only know what they do in fact know, and no one has any right to tell another that their life is fine and that they should feel free of hurt or fear.

My generation had a remarkable experience of contemplative, internal consideration of who they wanted to be and what they wanted to be like. That opportunity was often wasted, it was regularly practiced to an excessive degree, it became co-opted by self-asserted gurus who marketed self-realization, etc, etc - but it also made examining yourself to discover the real 'you' and not just assuming the role that previous generations and your culture hand to you a legitimate course. It is a suicide of 'self' to simply adopt as your own the interests, fears, and hopes of others, either other individuals or the culture you find yourself born into . . . or an 'other' culture.

One sad consequence of the counter-culture's practice of not falling in-line with convention has been the swooning over foreign, exotic, 'other' cultures. Suddenly (historically speaking) John Wayne is evil and Geronimo is noble, Christianity is wicked and Hinduism is romanticized, mashed potatoes are lame and hummus is cool. My generation left behind many of the things they were born into to delight in things others were born into . . . young people were stumbling around seeking mantras and mocking patriotism and wearing clothes and eating food that was simply some other culture's fashion and cuisine. In an effort to avoid simply adopting convention and sliding right into the life you were expected to live, many since the 60s have done little more than assume a contempt for the familiar and chase after a delight for something 'other'.


The Prefabricated Persona Closet

The public advance of what's (currently) cool and the media's representation of what we should have disdain for, feed the individual's longing to fit in, to be accepted. Consider the contestants on tv talent competition shows who don't want to make beautiful music but just want to be famous, they don't think they should win because they can sing so remarkably well but because they are so special . . . again and again they say things like 'If only America can get to know me, can see me a tv, they would love me'. And so popular culture catalogs and presents to us who we all are and what is acceptable and what is not; single moms are heroic while happily married moms are probably unable to make decisions on their own, the gay guy on a tv show is decent and honorable while the heterosexual guy watching NSCAR with a beer is likely not too bright and undoubtedly homophobic, the young public defender or teacher is noble while the oil company or bank employee is corrupt, etc. We have cartoonish types, prefabricated personas set before us, and in our fearful effort to be accepted, to be cool instead of mocked, too many simply go to the closet of ready-to-wear personhood and select who we want to be.

One young girl is vegan and hates Republicans and listens to Mumford & Sons and some middle aged man is afraid of his boss so he pushes his wife around and drinks too many beers every weekend and stays home while he sends his kids to Sunday School . . . but, are either of them really those people? Have either of them ever removed themselves from the current that has swept them up and carried them along and earnestly considered what they really want, what would really make them happy? Not what people like them like, not what tv tells them brings happiness, but what about them might remain had they been born in Peru or had been born 400 years ago?

I fear that a great many people, and perhaps all of us to a degree, don't become the true 'us' that we have within us to be, but simply put on a persona of who we wish we were, who we think others will approve of, who our contemporary culture asserts we ought to be. I honestly think that many more of us than we might at first consider, don't know what kind of music we like, what kind of food we like, what our own true thoughts about life & death are, what we think about ourselves and what we think about God, etc. Some went to the prefabricated persona closet so long ago and so naively, and they so un-ceremonially picked-out who they thought they ought be and put that on, and they have lived so long in their ready-to-wear personhood, that they genuinely think that's who they are.

We need to regularly examine ourselves, not in a self-aggrandizing manner, but in a real stripped-down and critical manner seeking truth . . . why do we care so much what others think and when did we start reading one romance novel after another and why do we hoot and cheer when a chef says he's adding more wine to his dish, etc, etc - what is it that would genuinely make us happy?



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Comments 16 comments

bravewarrior profile image

bravewarrior 4 years ago from Central Florida

Awesome, my friend! We indeed, don the cloaks of who we think we should be early in life. Suddenly, you find yourself in your 50's wondering what happened to the self of yesteryear and his or her dreams? Losing site of your self and becoming society's clone is a very dangerous thing to the mind and soul.

While we do have aspects of our lives to which we must succumb, we must develop a sense of self and never lose site! We are unique souls, not mass produced robots!


Docmo profile image

Docmo 4 years ago from UK

Awesome Mickey. The realm of the inner self is not often visited by many, instead concentrating on mirrors and filters. your discourse on the emperor's old clothes is a testament to banishing triviality and reaching deeper within. We all may be wearing Emperor's old clothes: stripping down to the real 'us' is the true emperor's New clothes. who dares to strip? Well, we did!


Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

Voted up and awesome. I think it should all begin with knowing yourself and being your own best friend and then take it from there. Congrats great series all great hubs. Enjoying this much. Let's all live in perfect harmony. Passing this on.


marcoujor profile image

marcoujor 4 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

Mickey,

You, sir, have blown me away with your perspective, using such a metaphorical story. I can relate on so many levels, having grown up so close to you and seeing many of the same entrenched issues.

This warrants a second (maybe more) read to truly reflect. You did a fabulous job.

Thank you for your leadership and patience. You rock. UP and UABI.

Hugs, Maria


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 4 years ago from South Africa

What an interesting fact, proving that each generation has to face bare reality before they can get to themselves: “… To them (previous generations), pulling at your bottom lip as you tilted your head upward to 'find yourself' was nothing but ludicrous - they 'found themselves' in the hard work of living the lives they were dealt.”

We are actually living in ‘better times’.

I dare to say that the hippies may not have been the pioneers who had discovered new land and new knowledge and insights about world wars, but the pioneers that had discovered the human soul – the womb of all human deeds. Their tantrums demanded the attention of everybody and all and the results were development on many levels of humanity.

Ref: The Prefabricated Persona Closet – I do believe that Human Behavior should become a compulsive subject in all schools. When people understand the behavior of themselves and their fellowman, Life would be so much easier and more people would be able to be happy simply because they’re alive and able to love themselves and others and all that exists on this beautiful Earth.

Mickey, I enjoyed this hub of yours tremendously and voted it up to the stars.


MickeySr profile image

MickeySr 4 years ago from Hershey, Pa. Author

bravewarrior ~ my 1st comment in this stretching before us hub series. Thanks, again and again.


MickeySr profile image

MickeySr 4 years ago from Hershey, Pa. Author

Thanks Docmo - I'm more and more encouraged for this experiment.


MartieCoetser profile image

MartieCoetser 4 years ago from South Africa

MickeySR, I woke up with your hub in my mind - you've given me a new perceptive on hippies, in particular on their intentional AND unintentional motives.

I believe in the South-African-philosophy called 'Ubuntu' - "I am what I am because of who we all are."

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ubuntu_(philosophy)

The hippie-generation was the PRODUCT of the previous generation(s) - in the perfect environment (America at that time) teenagers simply germinated into hippies expressing philosophies that were certainly also in the mind of their enlightened ancestors, but suppressed because of authoritative intimidation.

You've given wings to my thoughts!


tillsontitan profile image

tillsontitan 4 years ago from New York

"be informed by the perspectives of others"...a great idea for this wonderful series, particularly since it is written by such GREAT writers. You started it off with a bang...how often, especially today, people 'go with the flow' and don't stop and think for themselves!

Hippies just showed everyone what happens when you lose control...object LOUDLY to anything you don't like, but don't do anything about it....drug yourself and be happy without responsibility. Much of that has changed but much has not. "Falling in line" as you put it is just as bad as objecting to everything and anything.

Lots to think about here! Voted up, useful, awesome, and interesting.


MickeySr profile image

MickeySr 4 years ago from Hershey, Pa. Author

Gypsy ~ I so glad you visited, thanks for the comment and votes.


MickeySr profile image

MickeySr 4 years ago from Hershey, Pa. Author

tillsontitan ~ "a great idea for this wonderful series"

Thanks, and . . . we're looking for guest contributors, our next in the series will be published October 15th on the theme 'Vanity' . . ?


Sueswan 4 years ago

Hi Mickey,

"Why do we care so much about what others think?" A waste of time cause we have no control over others thoughts only are own. Not caring so much about what others think about us and being true to ourselves doesn't make us uncaring.

Voted up and awesome

Take care :)


MickeySr profile image

MickeySr 4 years ago from Hershey, Pa. Author

Martie ~ "I woke up with your hub in my mind"

I must admit, mixed in with my appreciation, that kind of consequence of me blabbering always stops my in my tracks - with a bit of trepidation. The week a lady in our Bible Study started a comment saying "Mickey, I remember once you said . . . " and it gave me chills. I'm not at all sure people should give that kind of attention to ideas I so eagerly vomit all over everyone.


MickeySr profile image

MickeySr 4 years ago from Hershey, Pa. Author

Maria ~ 'blowing you away' . . . that I like - so, are we excited to see what we all do with 'Vanity'? And, especially so with our guest writer, Gypsy!


MickeySr profile image

MickeySr 4 years ago from Hershey, Pa. Author

Sueswan ~ thanks so much for the visit, comment, and votes.


SilentReed profile image

SilentReed 3 years ago from Philippines

I remember rooting for John Wayne against the Vietcong in the Green Beret movie. Until Bruce Lee gave us an Asian identity to counter the Micky Rooney "Mr. Yunioshi" stereotype perception in "Breakfast at Tiffany", AND a personal reevaluation of the history I was taught in school, western decadence :) manage to seep into my youthful conscience :) The "Age of Aquarius" and senseless killings of the Vietnam war was a major factor in the psyche of that time. But the hippie "make love not war" movement was a universal rebellion against tradition among the youth, irrespective of race or culture.

The older generation looked with disapproval and tried to enforce their values on us, forgetting that they were the James Deans of yesteryear rebelling against their own parents. I chuckle now that I find myself in the role of my parents. I had to learn to adjust my perspective with regard to my children's search for their own identity. Having the faith that I assume my parents had in me, that they would after a few false start, find their place in this world.

But I can't help feeling that the continuity between my generation and theirs have somehow been mangled by today's advancement in technology and living lifestyles.Things move too fast, too much multitasking, and too casual. Everything is like eating at McDonald's, paper plates and cups (OK, Styrofoam), everything disposable, including family values. Am I reacting just like my parents?

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