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Imagine Starting Over / When Your Last Child Leaves For College

Updated on May 12, 2011

Starting over. Imagine the possibilities that lie ahead. Chances are you have lots of life left to live when your last child leaves for college. How will you plan to really make something of your new-found freedom? Please read on for inspiration.

The Best Investment You Can Ever Make Is In Yourself

Successful people often invest in themselves because they know it guarantees amazing return and can never be lost. Today I am doing just that, investing in myself. I am thinking about the possibilities that lie ahead.

My last child will be leaving home soon for college and I am beginning to feel the excitement of ‘returning to my life’ or even possibly ‘starting over’. That is not to say that I have no fear about significant changes soon to take place. Starting over is like a set of building blocks. Our mindset and our thinking can make everything possible. Everything happens twice: once in your mind, as what you think, and once in reality. That is why you need to think about what you want daily.

Thinking equals building. If you think about how you would like to start your life anew, you are actually building a new life.

Imagine The Possibilities of 'Starting Over'
Imagine The Possibilities of 'Starting Over'

A Valuable Lesson I Learned From a Stay-At-Home-Dad

For the past five years I volunteered at a local church to mind toddlers while their moms attended a mom-2-mom connection group. This year I had the honor to mind the 2 and 3 year olds with Steve, a stay-at-home dad.

When I got to know Steve better I began asking lots of questions; curious to learn more about his life starting over in his new stay-at-home role. Both of Steve’s children were in our class. As you can imagine they demanded his attention frequently. I admired how he consistently taught them right from wrong and corrected them when they got out of line, as all children often do. He also never neglected to mention the good with the bad.

One day, Steve told me that the more time he spent with his children, he could see within himself that he was becoming more like his own father. Without mention of what that was, I gathered it wasn’t something that he liked. So Steve went to his pastor at church and courageously asked for help. The next day, the two of them went on a day long hike. They shared much and returned exhausted.

That evening, Steve phoned his father and talked for two very productive hours. Before Steve went to sleep that night he broke down and cried like a baby.

Since that day, I could sense a freshness in Steve’s spirit. A new joy had sprung from his soul. Although, I don’t know what the conversation was between he and his dad, I did start to notice that Steve’s bond with his children was beginning to change. He was beginning to not only teach his young son and daughter right from wrong but to truly love them both for who they uniquely are.

I learned a valuable lesson about courage and reaching out for help. Steve made the best investment and that was in himself.

Re-Awaken Your Dreams

It can be very easy to lose sight of your dreams. Don’t let your thinking kill your ideas. If you choose to abandon your dreams, you risk becoming a slave to other people’s projects.

The steps toward your dreams are built in the present. It is in the NOW! Your thoughts and choices you make when you begin ‘starting over’ form the foundation of whether you will achieve your dreams or not. In fact, your thoughts and choices are the very lifeblood of your dreams.

Forget about the dreams that the world sells to you and what others say you can or cannot do. Listen very carefully to your soul. For within it are the secrets to your happiness and fulfillment of your purpose.

Positive energy is the gateway to your dreams. Reaching for your dreams is a state of mind that believes everything imaginable is possible. And the path to your dreams is clarified by each small step that you take.

What Not To Do

Recently, I read a comment posted on a webpage about “The Empty Nest Syndrome”. It went like this: “I have a 22 year old and a 17 year old at home. I am trying to prepare myself for when the time comes as I know it will be so lonely, and I will not know what to do. Just the thought of it now makes me…”

Now, I did not have to click on this post to find out where her life is headed. (There was once an old lady who lived in a shoe. She was so lonely she didn’t know what to do).

I hope you clearly see how this woman is self-sabotaging her own dreams. Avoid this at all costs.

Congratulate Yourself

Although the job of being a parent is never done, you have reached a goal. You have raised an independent young adult, which is no easy task. Give yourself a pat on the back. Allow yourself a bit of pride for a job well done.

Here’s What You Can Look Forward To

How many times have you heard parents jokingly say how they can’t wait for their children to 'fly the coop' so they can finally enjoy some much needed peace and quiet? The days of shuffling children from their commitments and staying up late hoping your teenagers are really where they say they will be are over. And before you know it, water, electric and grocery bills take a dive and your home seems to be a whole lot cleaner all by itself. And last but not least you may notice that even though you’ve lost a teenager, you’ve also gained a bathroom.

Upon returning from picking up my mail today, to my bewilderment, was an official government business letter from the office of the jury commissioner addressed to me. I am being summonsed to serve as a trial juror commencing on Sept. 4th, 2008. A knowing failure to obey this summons without justifiable excuse is a crime. That is the same week that my freedom begins when my daughter begins college. Jury duty is not included in my starting over plan. I say robbing me of my long deserved freedom is a crime. I’ve come to learn through the years of raising children that you pick your battles wisely and sometimes you just have to let things be and I just had to laugh.

Best wishes as you imagine starting over. You now have your very own life, so go lead it!

John Lennon / Image

"Starting Over" / John Lennon

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