Motherhood is a Lifetime Job

My son and his children, the eldest girl and the boy-girl twins; this picture was taken when they were still living near my home in 2004. Beside me is my daughter when she was still single.
My son and his children, the eldest girl and the boy-girl twins; this picture was taken when they were still living near my home in 2004. Beside me is my daughter when she was still single.
My granddaughter, CyeCye, my daughter's eldest...2 years
My granddaughter, CyeCye, my daughter's eldest...2 years
My grand baby boy, Claude, 4 months...my daughter's second baby
My grand baby boy, Claude, 4 months...my daughter's second baby

Conditioning through colours and forms

My son's children benefit from their father's success
My son's children benefit from their father's success
A scrapbook on self confidence and financial success
A scrapbook on self confidence and financial success
symbolic presentation of financial success
symbolic presentation of financial success
If your son grows up in a happy family environment then he will have a bigger chance of having it himself.
If your son grows up in a happy family environment then he will have a bigger chance of having it himself.
Some f my son's collections of dozens of expensive guitars
Some f my son's collections of dozens of expensive guitars
This is a rich universe
This is a rich universe
The magic of colours in a child's development of creative ability
The magic of colours in a child's development of creative ability
Joy in learning pays of in adult life
Joy in learning pays of in adult life
This is a world of potentials.
This is a world of potentials.

Mother's heart

Like any normal mother, I love my son and would shake the whole universe if necessary just so my son will have a good life.I am not a typical mother though so I cannot expect my first born to be a typical son too.

It all started when I happened to get so attracted to this very beautiful 6-month old baby boy. I was 19 years old then when I went to my classmate's house to get the book she borrowed from me in which she either forgot to return or had intentionally keep it. Then I saw the baby there, he was my classmate's nephew.

The baby's name was Roland and what attracted me to him was his very healthy features, the flawless and glowing baby skin, the giggles and everything a wonderful baby could be. I stayed almost a day there just watching and playing with Roland. That was my first time to have spent so much time with a baby; I was not exposed to any baby before. This experience of attraction to a baby haunted me from then on.

In my fantasy I imagined myself having a baby exactly or better than that. From then on I collected pictures of beautiful baby boys and made a scrap book of them. I even bought a huge poster of a very beautiful baby and posted it on the wall of my bedroom.

My own baby boy

One year later, I was 20, I gave birth to my first born. It was such a joy beyond compare when I first set eyes on my first born; it was like I fell in love for the first time; I just can't believe I have my own baby coming out from me. Then in my solitude I had resolved quietly, and with tears of joy in my eyes, that from this day onwards my life would revolve around him.

He was a bulky 12-pound baby boy, so big for a Filipino infant at birth. He was also too fair-skinned for a Filipino baby that people around would say that his father must have been a Caucasian. He was such a beautiful baby I had ever seen and he is my son, my gift..., more beautiful than those in the pictures I had collected; such awesome feeling.

The reality of parenting

But the awesome baby is another human being and the responsibility of being a parent is not just to awe in wonder in every moment of the child's life. I realized in my youthful motherhood that to have a child is in fact the onset of a completely changed life.

I took this realization seriously so I sat down one day and wrote everything that my new life should be with my child in my full charge. I listed down scenarios of our life together in a moment by moment basis including the life of my baby since birth up to the time that he would be the father of my grandchildren.

One Sunday when I was attending church, the Preacher was telling of five brothers who all became Pastors when they were adults; their Dad was a Judge and was so disappointed because he should have wanted another Judge or Attorney from any of his sons. This message gave me an idea.

The only rule is LOVE

I love my baby every second, every minute, every hour, every day, every week every month, every year and for the rest of my life. The bottom line is I love him unconditionally and with the kind of love that only a mother's heart can do.

The question then is "how do I love my child?".

Because I love my child I had formulated the following scenario;

1. I will finish a degree (I was an out-of-school then) so that he will be proud of me when he grows up;

2. I will make him the millionaire son when he is in his twenties.

But how could it be when I am not a millionaire myself? I knew then that I was just hitting the moon but I did research works just for this obsession; the obsession of a young mother-in-love-with-her-first-born. I wanted the best for him.

My strategy as a doting mother

While life was busy with work, dreams, ambitions, plans and every concern there was in life, y priority was still my son and my daughter who followed three years later. Having to beautiful children made more inspired in life. I finally finished my degree.

Things I did for their future success

1. Big posters on the wall

2. musical instruments

3. scrapbooks and colouring books

4. spending quality time as a family

5. giving them assignment and rewards for achievement


Big posters on the wall

My objective for the posters is to have a successful son and daughter in their adult life so in the bedroom of my son were beautiful and colourful posters of a wealthy and famous personality. Other posters are of money. I also created collage that showed me as being wealthy with all the symbols of money and success.

In the receiving room and all around the walls of my house were posters of guitars and musical instruments because I wanted my son to be a good guitar player just like my Dad and brother.

Musical instruments

Music is the language of the soul and so aside from the posters of musical instruments, I bought guitars and electronic organs that I played myself. I also invited my brother weekly to play the guitar and eventually taught my son to play it.

Scrapbooks and colouring books

I din't really push them with colours and scrapbooks; I just bought a lot of them and do colouring myself. I drew and colour and he just imitated me. Most of my drawings were of nature but the scrapbooks were money and material possessions.

Spending quality time

Spending quality time with kids differ in many ways; it can be educational, leisurely or playfully, exploring nature, excursions in the city or some establishments, and the church and these could be done spontaneously better yet as a surprise or reward for good works in their parts.

Parenting is a lifetime job. Parents learn from their children and vice versa.



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Comments 15 comments

Jynzly profile image

Jynzly 4 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA Author

purnimamoh1982,

I had just read your truly wonderful hub...keep up your creative motherhood. God Bless.


Jynzly profile image

Jynzly 4 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA Author

Thanks for the visit.


Jynzly profile image

Jynzly 4 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA Author

purnimamoh1982,

I had just read your hub and left a comment there. Yes parenthood is a personal matter and every sensibly loving mother has her unique way to inculcate values system and creativity, among others, to her children. My best shot is "live the life" I would like my children to see and experience it themselves. For a child the mother is a statement in all areas in life...her actions speak louder than words.


Jynzly profile image

Jynzly 4 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA Author

purnimamoh1982,

Thanks for dropping by. Yes, I will read your hub too.

Each mother is unique in expressing their love and care to their children. We all differ in bringing up our children but the best way to teach our children is to "model" the virtues and values system that we wish to inculcate to them. Living our lives "right" in all areas is louder than words for them.


purnimamoh1982 profile image

purnimamoh1982 4 years ago

A beautiful hub and very sensible position. Motherhood is a lifelong experience and expectations do continue even when your kids grow old. Voted up and followed. My experience in the world of parenthood is rather small compared to yours, but interestingly, my introspections do match with those of yours. Please see my hubs. especially the one I have written on creativity of children. http://hubpages.com/education/Engaging-Children-in...


Jynzly profile image

Jynzly 4 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA Author

Hi dementedmom.

Whew, I can feel how you feel, and that baby boy; you're right, his peace and smile is a consolation by itself. You remind me of my childbearing years and the joy/sacrifice it brought. Now I am just witnessing my daughter, 31, also working, a College Instructor and she's got that wonderful 6-month baby boy, he's a joy. I love babies, beautiful babies.


dementedmom profile image

dementedmom 4 years ago from R.O.I.

i just had a baby 3 months ago. the last 2 months of my pregnancy was very difficult, i could hardly stand each and every morning. i cry everytime i get out of bed, thats how bad it is. i cannot wait for my due date to come...then it came. i had a very healthy baby boy unfortunately he cries and feed every hour every night. he is better now. i was able to get him into a little routine....its a work in progress. sometimes i wish i could have a day off....a day of not having to look after or worry about my baby. im always exhausted. but then again everytime i look at my son's face when he is sleeping......he looks so peaceful. or when he smiles at me, all that waking and feeding and dancing/pacing to and fro, not being able to brush my hair, eating my meals in 2 minutes, nappy changing and sleepless nights is all worth it. you are right, motherhood is 24/7. even when they have grown and had a family of their own, your duty as a mother does not stop...it goes beyond that.


Jynzly profile image

Jynzly 4 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA Author

Hi Kelleyward,

Thanks for the comment; yes people have varied reasons for having children. For me, I just thought it was fun but realize later how serious it is to become a mother.

Jynzly


kelleyward 4 years ago

Great info I just asked a lot of people why they chose to have children and got some interesting responses. It's amazing how diff our choices are. It's called Why we have children. Thanks for sharing why motherhood is a lifetime job!


Jynzly profile image

Jynzly 4 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA Author

Hi Alur,

Thanks for the comment; I wish you success in parenting your child. You will learn and find your own method; loving your child unditionally is the basic.


Jynzly profile image

Jynzly 4 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA Author

Thank you very much Nell, I am honorre by your comment. Yes, my children are the meaing of my life and I had devoted my time and everything to them when they still needed it. Now they are already self-supporting and successful...there is also a disadvantage when they are successful; that's why I married again.

Your story concerning my husband was really interesting.

Jynzly


Nell Rose profile image

Nell Rose 4 years ago from England

Hi, you have a beautiful family, and what a great way to teach them, and for you to get yourself organised too, motherhood is such as special time when they are tiny and again when they grow and have children of their own, its the best! cheers nell


Jynzly profile image

Jynzly 4 years ago from Marion, Indiana, USA Author

Thank you jacqui,

Yes, I do, my son is a systems analyst and owns his business, my daughter is also a College Instructor. I feel like my love for them pays off.

I wish you success too in our motherhood lifetime job.

Jynzly


jacqui2011 profile image

jacqui2011 4 years ago from Leicester, United Kingdom

I can tell how much you love your children and grandchildren. You have a lovely family. I have two daughters and want the very best for both of them too. Motherhood really is a full time job, but the best one in the world. I love the photographs.


ALUR profile image

ALUR 4 years ago from USA

As a single mother of 3, I have learned that simply producing a seed of life does not make a good mother. It is how we raise and provide a foundation for our children that makes all the difference.

Too bad they don't come with a manual.

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