Self-Help Tips To Overcome Anger
Introduction
Anger is a natural emotion and experienced by all. It is an emotion that is more acceptable to socially express as opposed to other negative emotions such as sadness or guilt. Yet, in a lifetime most of society can say that anger has gotten the best of them at least a handful of times. However, if not managed or controlled, anger can be a rotten beast that eats away at your insides without mercy and that lack of control can prove to be very volatile.
Just by watching the local news most of us can gather that societal anger is increasing and the results of internalized anger is problematic to us all. Your own anger can leave you feeling embarrassed and ashamed if it gets out of hand. You may begin to wonder who is to blame and how to change especially if anger takes the joy out of life.
Many times an angry person blames everyone but themselves when they throw their numerous tantrums; I know because I have been there. Changing jobs, loved ones and mostly everything around you except yourself because remember the world is the problem. That is until that dark day that you are left to yourself and the light bulb appears from nowhere; I am the problem. If you are not there yet hopefully by reading this you may at least have an idea of change but how this is who you are.
One thing to remember anger is a basic emotion and is absolutely normal as long as it is displayed in an appropriate manner without anyone getting hurt.
Identifying if You Have Anger Issues
It is pretty clear that you have a problem if you have a hard time maintaining relationships or if the ones you do have in your life is in fear of your “episodes.” One way of telling if you are angry is to watch yourself in a conversation and watch your face; continually frowning, raising voice, feeling of irritation is a definite sign. Ask people that regularly see you and have them describe your behavior; hopefully they are honest. This is probably the hardest stage as many as taking accountability for your anger and behavior is your responsibility and not that of others. Have you ever said or heard “Well they made me mad.” Remember, being angry is a choice.
What techniques have helped you to deal with anger?
Quickly Identify if Anger is a Problem in Your Life
The emotion you reserve for enemies
The emotion that most often accompanies or precedes aggressive behavior
The emotion that triggers the fight component of your nervous system’s fight or flight response.
The emotion that is opposite of fear
The emotion that expresses itself in revenge
The emotion that signals that you feel personally threatened
The emotion that’s associated with blame
The emotion that can be deadly when it comes to your health.
The emotions that’s negative in tone
The emotion that gets your blood boiling
The emotion that you are the most afraid of
The emotion that expresses the combative side of your personality
The emotion that everyone else around you is most afraid of
The emotion that always does more harm than good!!
Control Your Emotions Through Journaling
Anger Myths
Males are angrier than females
Anger is bad/good
Anger is only a problem when you openly express it
The older you get, the more irritable you are
Anger is all in the mind
Anger is all about getting even
Only certain types of people have a problem with anger
Anger is a result of human conflict
Do You Have an Angry Personality?
A person that generally has adapted into being angry all the time and mostly lives in fight mode may not even realize that this has become a problem for yourself and others. Also, this type of person struggles with accepting his or her own behavior. If anger is not shown in a productive manner then the situation always results in the abuse of another individual. Abuse can be in the forms of physical, emotional, psychological, and verbal which can all be the results of someone’s out of control anger.
Is Your Personality Considered to be Angry in Nature?
You’re competitive
You like to dominate others
You’re impatient
You’re intense
You’re demanding
You’re confrontational
You’re forceful in pursuing goals
Impose Positive Thinking
Some Contributing Factors
Substances can be a contributing factor in anger as they are likely to reduce a person’s inhabitations and blur judgment.
Substances that can be problematic:
- Alcohol
- Caffeine
- Nicotine
- Tranquilizers
- Cocaine
- Chemical inhalants
- PCP
- Hypnotics
- Sedatives.
Traumas
Other factors that can contribute to the feeling of anger is past traumas which has caused your lens of the world to become altered and damaged, therefore, a sense of the world working against you may have been formed thereby becoming defensive.
Overcome Your Anger
There are several tried and true ways of managing and/or conquering your anger and the outbursts that accompany it. No matter the method of treatment beginning is key. There are both self-help measures and professional help that can assist you with learning a new way of life beyond your anger.
Some Self-help Measures Include:
- Stop – when getting mad just stop and walk away.
- Counting – everyone has probably heard counting to 10 helps
- Meditation
- Guided imagery
- Sustain from substances
Professional Help:
- Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy- addresses distorted thinking that contributes to angry perceptions
- Trauma treatment – learn to heal traumas that provoke you to be angry at the world
Anger Resources
- How to Let Go of Anger In The Heat Of The Moment
This article explains how we inadvertently increase feelings of anger, and gives suggestions for how to effectively let go instead. - How to Deal With Anger - Learn to control your anger...
Anger is a powerful emotion that, if uncontrolled, it could lead our lives and cause chaos and destruction in our relations with others. Learn to control it by following these tips.
Conclusion
So much can be explained in the nature of anger and how to identify, contemplate change, make a plan, follow progress. Changing anger is a process that requires practice and persistence. Failure to be perfect is part of change.
Do not give up.
