An Easter Tradegy, and Blessing

On Easter, in 1985, I was only a mere seven years old. I was young, and care-free, and didn't give a thought of anything besides everyday-play and imagination. I had a "close-knit" family and we did everything together. Every holiday was at one person's house, but everyone was there. My aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, we were all there! Then came Easter of 1985... My great-grandmother passed away that day...

I knew nothing of death. But, seeing I was very close to my great-grandmother, my mother and father agreed to let me go to the funeral... When we got to the funeral home, I remember my mom and dad trying to "prepare" me for what I was about to deal with, but as a seven year old girl would think... "It's been a few days since I seen Granny, I can't wait to see her!"...

We walk in, and find a place to sit, as it was very packed in there that day. I seen the casket, but of course, didn't think anything of it, I was too busy trying to find Granny. Finally, I said "Where's Granny?"And my mother pointed to the casket, and said "Right there, we'll go up and see her in a minute..." Well, obviously, I had heard what everyone had been saying, but I assume, my parents didn't think any deaths would be happening soon, and I was still young, so they hadn't got around to filling me in on the "other" processes of life... I was still too naive, so why bring it up if you don't expect it to happen, right? Thentry to cram the meaning of death down a seven-year-old's throat in just a day and a half! (What would you say?)

Well, needless to say, I seen other people going up to see her, so naturally, I wanted to, too! So, after the line got a little shorter, I remember us standing up, and walking up to the casket. I asked if she was sleeping... I tried to wake her up...I totally freaked right out. This was my first funeral, and my mother had to leave with me. I wanted to touch her, and get in there with her. I kept asking mom, "WHY WON'T SHE WAKE UP, MOMMY? WHY WON'T SHE WAKE UP?"... My family members began to cry harder, as my mom and dad tried to calm me down, but it just wasn't happening. I was freaking out...Literally. I was screaming and crying... I wanted Granny! Mom left with me and brought me to our neighbors house, where our neighbor, Kay, held me and rocked me until I fell asleep. I don't think I was "right" after that day...

I was visiting her grave site quite often prior to meeting my husband. I had two children from a previous relationship, so I brought them with me a lot, too. The kids never met her, but they spoke of her like they had. They would play tag, and hide-n-seek in the cemetery while I said what I had to say to Granny, then they would go around and pick up pine cones, and dandelions, and "odd" things they found laying around, and they would set them either in front of her stone, or on top of it. I had taken quite a few pictures, (one in which I think there is a "ghost"), but of course, I spread it around like crazy, and I have unfortunately, lost track of it... I wanted my kids to know what death was, and to not be afraid, or wonder about it. If they had questions, I would try to answer them the best way I could... My kids are not afraid of cemeteries, or ghosts, or any stories like that. They are very open-minded, like Mom. (*smile*)

I spent a lot of time with Granny Brown prior to that tragic Easter, You are probobly thinking that I dislike Easter because of bad memories, right? Well, here, I will tell you, that yes, I hated Easter at one time, but something very special changed that...

Not only have I had dreams where Granny has given me some sort of "hidden" message, but my youngest daughter, Piper, was born on Easter. The funny thing, is that Easter in 2005 was on March 27th... (Yeah, March!) But it was Easter Sunday, and I believe her birth has something to do with Granny...

Granny was four-foot-eleven, so she was very petite. (I have added a few of my favorite pictures of her here), and my daughter, Piper, is built the same as her. (Pics of her too...) She is small for her age, tiny, and petite, and I swear she acts so much older than four! She's so smart, she actually surprises me a lot of the time! I have blue-ish colored eyes, Granny had brown eyes, Piper has brown eyes. Granny read tea leaves, and had those "special powers" from within naturally. I, some-what, am connected to "other" places of my mind that I cannot control... And I believe Piper is the same way.

Maybe these are just coincidences, but I like to think otherwise. To me, it's proof that my great-grandmother has never left my memories, or my thoughts, and still remains safe within me. She is a part of everything I say and do. She inspiresme to do some of the things I do in my life... Some of the collections, and scents... She collected elephants-So do I... I was looking for a new perfume one day... I opened "TABU", and instantly loved it. I had to buy it, and I wear it regularly to this day...My other grandmother says it is what Granny used to wear... (Coincidence?) There is more, but that is another hub...

Maybe Easter started out being a day of "bad" memories, but it ended up meaning a whole lot more to me than eggs and rabbits. Until 2005, I despisedEaster, but thanks to "coincidences", my Easter doesn't have to be sad anymore. My great-grandmother, Lena Brown, was a very beautiful, very kind-hearted, and loving woman. I'll never forget her, and someday, I will see her again. And what a grand reunion it will be! Honestly, I can't wait. I wish I could talk to her right now. Even more so, now that this hub has brought me back to those "pre-seven" years... Thank you, Princessa, for leading the way.