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Its all your own fault!

Updated on November 15, 2010

It's you! You're the problem.

It's all your fault.

It always was all your fault and it's really silly of you not to see it. It's high time you recognized yourself and I'm gonna help you with it because I'm kind, decent and a bloody genius!

Firstly, just understand that nothing has changed in the world ok? It's just that you can't keep up. The peak hour traffic is doing exactly what it always does, it doesn't change at all.

You are a part of the peak hour because your life is organized in to time blocks that correspond with it so that's your fault for starters.

After all, if you're one of those who are pissing in the milk, you can't complain that it's tainted now can you?

Lets face it. You shouldn't drive in peak hour traffic, you don't have the temperament for it.

You don't pick the traffic lanes well, or early enough either. That's why you have to shove in at the last minute to make your turn offs. To be honest, you're a lousy driver. You should have left 15 minutes earlier to compensate for your lack of ability.

You should also have been getting smarter about your driving generally by now. Then you wouldn't have endangered yourself by almost having an accident when you met another person who is blaming the traffic like you do and drives as poorly as you do.

My only advice is to slow down even more and ....... don't turn the radio on! You will lose even more of the tiny bit of concentration you possess now if you do, and that would be even more dangerous.

Front up! Realize that you are a menace on the roads, it's all your fault so just get over it and take the bus from now on.

It's also come to my notice how many times you need to make the same mistake in other areas of your life before you learn.

The kids are always spilling something if you let em loose, you know that. So who's fault is it that chocolate got on the fancy lace trim of the evening gown when you showed it to them?

Why are you still so insecure that you needed the approval of a 3 and 5 year old anyway?

Get over yourself!

A photo of me on a good day.

I don't always look this good!
I don't always look this good!

Remember when you got the opinions of the kids about that new sexy "little black dress" you spent the month's housekeeping money to buy?

You should know by now the little ones are going to tell you they can see your bum, and that black makes you look as if you were dead. I think "You look fat in that" should have done it for you last time. No point running out of the room crying ...... what did you really expect? Did you think they were going to ask if it is available in their size?

You know full well that you're clumsy too, yet you still insist on stacking the dishes on the sink until they are so high they slide off the bench one by one and explode when they hit the floor.

Then knowing full well that you have a bad back, you bend down awkwardly to sweep up the pieces and do your back in again. You are a slow learner ain't you? Who to blame for that? Clearly it's your fault!

Another thing I would like to point out is your habit of getting up every morning early and rushing to log on to read your latest adsense income only to find that it is still at .01 cent as it has been for the last three years. You have been online long enough to be used to failure, it should not be something you have to reinforce hourly!

You have to write stuff that people read, whinging in an "article" about the incident with the little black dress and the ankle biters just won't put you in the big league earning group online.

I've tried not to be too critical in this hub as I know you are very sensitive to being given advice.

That sensitivity thing. It's all your fault too.

Tell you what.

Why don't you have a nice cuppa tea, lie back and read another nice hub like this one!

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