The Nazi Party - Dumb Poem # 62

It is OK to use a word that would ordinarily mean one thing to mean something entirely different. I once had a book written by an author ("KMS") who wanted to remain anonymous. He wrote the thing with a mixture of English and German, but used neither of those languages altogether correctly. His stuff was funny but sometimes a little difficult to understand on first reading. There was one passage in his book dealing with the conversation between a "naturalized" old-timer (a German immigrant who had lived in Chicago for many years) and a freshly-arrived immigrant. The latter asked in German if the old-timer would kindly tell him where the streetcar stopped. The old-timer obliged, using a funny mixture of bad English and murdered German. The immigrant then asked the old-timer to tell him "in German." The old-timer muttered under his breath, "Good grief. The guy's been here for only a short ten days and already he has forgotten his mother language!"

Well, I have been here long enough to handle English OK, and my high school gave me three years of learning German before they turned me loose on the world, but I thought it was going to be fun to murder both languages in the following dumb poem. You could do the same.


Another funny illustration by my friend, Al Kaeppel...

The Nazi Party


Iss not so demm schure soytin
who iss dees schtoopid Loytin.
Zey komm und dine,
trink all mine vine,
denn schwing on vindow coytin.

More by this Author


Comments 9 comments

maven101 profile image

maven101 7 years ago from Northern Arizona

HAW !!...Coytin? A German with a Brooklyn accent...Too funny...well done, my friend...Larry


GusTheRedneck profile image

GusTheRedneck 7 years ago from USA Author

Thanks Larry. The German word for people is "Leuten." Most everyone would pronounce that as "Looten." So I wrote, "Loytin" and that worked with "coytin" (curtain) and "soytin" (certain) and maybe caused a grimace to appear on the face of a German speaker. (Kind of like JFK's "Ich bin ein Berliner!" in his speech to the Germans then suffering through the Berlin problems. He thought that he had said, "I am a Berliner." I guess he found out later that he had told everyone that he was a jelly donut (ein Berliner). Language stuff can be funny when you get to messing around idioms and the like.


maven101 profile image

maven101 7 years ago from Northern Arizona

I remember listening to that speech with my Dad, a German speaker, and him remarking " Hey, he just called himself a pastry "....I'm still wondering if Obama has learned a few words in that rare language, Austrian...or Hillary the meaning in Russian for " reset "...Larry


Sue Adams profile image

Sue Adams 7 years ago from Andalusia

Hey thanks Gus for answering my question about multilingual puns and poetry, an even smaller niche than poetry itself.

We laughed our heads off the other night when asking English guests to pronounce the Dutch word "huilen", meaning "to cry". They tried and tried but could only come up with a sound like "Hoylen", as in the German "heulen".

Allow me to add a line to your poem.

Iss not so demm schure soytin

who iss dees schtoopid Loytin.

Zey komm und dine,

trink all mine vine,

denn schwing on vindow coytin,

Zey fall und konnen nur hoylen."

I find Spanish the most phonetic of the languages I know, less open to miss-pronounciation, less fun I guess.


GusTheRedneck profile image

GusTheRedneck 7 years ago from USA Author

Well, Howdy Sue...Let's just the two of us call our mutual efforts "sauerkraut!" As to Spanish, I speak only several words of that nice language. At a continuing Ed class, the instructor was playfully telling us about the time he instructed up in the northeast U.S. He gave examples of how some of his students pronounced various Spanish words. One that I remember well was "tamales." One of his students pronounced it, "Taa Males." There was more. :-)


drbj profile image

drbj 6 years ago from south Florida

Liked your dumb funny poem, Gus. It reminded me how we can get confused when someone with a heavy accent explains something to us.

My real life example: I had a professor in college (long, long ago) whose native language was Spanish and he still had a pronounced Spanish accent. For years I tried to figure out what he was talking about when he referred to Freud's "insides". What???

One day it dawned on me. He was saying, "insights". :)


GusTheRedneck profile image

GusTheRedneck 6 years ago from USA Author

Good Doctor bj - It is funny how some folks can pronounce things and "Freud's insides" surely has the qualifications. Nice one.

Gus :-)))


poo 4 years ago

poooo


GusTheRedneck profile image

GusTheRedneck 4 years ago from USA Author

Hi "poo" -

Can't say that I blame you - that is, "Dumb Poems" are exactly that - dumb. :)

Gus :-)))

    Sign in or sign up and post using a HubPages Network account.

    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No HTML is allowed in comments, but URLs will be hyperlinked. Comments are not for promoting your articles or other sites.


    Click to Rate This Article
    working